Does anyone have experience of dating agencies? Are they worth the money?

[winteriseverywhere]

I'm 35 and want to find a life long partner to have kids with but so far nothing I've done to find a man has worked. I've been online dating for the past 8 years and met about 130 men. Nothing has felt right although I've "given it a go" with 5 or 6 of them, for anything between 3 months and 15 months. It has never worked and it's usually me who ends things, most often just because I don't feel I'm really getting anything from the relationship but sometimes because of their pretty awful behaviour. I've also done speed dating and thrown myself into the meetup scene, both of which have generated a fair few dates but again I've never met anyone that I'd want to spend the rest of my life with.

I'm now considering going down the dating agency route but don't know if it's likely to just be more of the same, but with a far heftier price tag. Has anyone done this? Did they manage to find you anyone and if so how long did it take and what were the men (or women) like that you met along the way?

Well I Went on a paid site last year, met a wonderful man, moved in with him and now engaged! Didn't know actual dating agencies actually existed any more! I would not have thought it would have made a deal of difference whether the agency found you someone or a site did!

I would what fantas did and use a paid website if you haven't, or try another if you have. At least with those you are less likely to meet the creepier guys that go on the free ones as they aren't likely to pay.

Absolutely at least on paid sites you can be sure that the vast majority of the men are looking for a serious relationship!

Well, for balance, I've used paid sites as well as free sites and got nowhere and have now been 7 years single. And a cursory glance at the dating thread on here will show you that there are just as many people (just not men) looking for non-serious relationships on paid sites too. I found more fake profiles on paid sites also.

If I had the money, would I go to a dating agency? I have to say no. Having looked into them, they take an awful lot of money from you for doing not a lot of work and they do not appear any more likely to find you someone suitable than you doing the work yourself via online dating.

I thought I remembered a thread from a while ago (easily a year old) where this was discussed (talking about high end dating agencies the £k cost ones and people who had used them)but I can't find it.

Found some older threads here with some comments/conclusions to be drawn while I was looking. Does anyone know where the advanced search function went? Where you could search within particular topics and date limit it?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2524786-The-cost-of-professional-dating-agencies

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1786176-Matchmaking-introduction-agencies-Other-creative-ways-of-meeting-sane-happy-single-men

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/other_subjects/1226865-Help-with-introduction-agencies

Thanks CheersMedea - I'll have a look at those threads.

I'm already on match, okcupid and pof. I'm not having any issues with creepy men or men that don't want to commit. I have met a lot of men who have wanted to take things further with me and have been nice people but either I haven't fancied them or I just don't find that I ever enjoy their company enough to want to live with them for the rest of my life. I'm feeling pretty defeated to be honest.

I should add that I've also tried eharmoney and guardian soulmates but there was hardly anyone on either of them in my area and I didn't get any dates for the month or two that I was on those ones.

I've also tried expanding my social circle and been going to absolutely every party anyone ever throws but again, nothing ever comes of it.

*eharmony

That might sound patronising, but I honestly don't mean it this way.

Do you think you're having no luck because you have set the standards quite high? As in you've developed the ideal scenario in your head of the perfect man, children , marriage , house and so on. But none of the potential candidates are coming up to par with the scenario you've made?

I'm obviously not saying drop your standards and settle down with anyone. But because you want this so bad, maybe you have ruled out a lot of good potential partners.

I also know this phrase is so cliched but you often find love when you are least expecting it. Why not take a short break from dating for a while and roll with the punches.