Online dating - such BAD photos!!

[PinkGlitter17]

Just a lighthearted post.

I'm splitting up with H and was browsing (just for fun - I'm not up for dating any time soon) on match.com. I was surprised to see the men's profile photos. It seems to be a mixture of good photos of good-looking men, really bad photos of average guys, really bad photos of unattractive (imo) guys, and, frankly, photos that belong on Crimewatch (don't have nightmares 😉).

Why do people use such bloody awful pictures in their online dating profiles? Makes no sense.

ooo tell us more shatners - i need to know where i am going wrong

Cupcakes. So. Many. Cupcakes on women's profiles.

And horses. Anonymous group shots. Those bloody Instagram filters with golden butterflies around the head (that's an immediate no). Photos of their kids. None with them in, just their kids. Photos of them as a kid. Photos of them in a wedding dress.

Photos with other women who are more attractive. Mugshot photos - lots of really unaware women out there too.

Furlined What Bant said. Spot on.

yay i have done none of those :)

Why oh why the pictures with the past (or current) wife or girlfriend. Or the woman cropped out really badly. With smartphones there is o excuse for using old pics

LOL at these replies! I get it, I do, about these guys having a bad self-image. But yeah, it is really funny if you don't delve too deeply into the psychology behind it - and also fascinating to make psych assessments!

I've heard that women are just as bad at OLD profiles too tbf.

I'm sure women are, but we never get to see those ones! I know men don't seem to like the pouting/overly made up/heavily filtered ones - when I was still active (have chucked it in as a bad job at the moment) I used to get referred to as a "natural beauty" quite a lot - I am NOT! - but I have natural style photos, light make up (what I would wear on a normal day which apparently to men looks like none at all 😄), try to smile nicely in a natural way...this is what I like to see from men too. Just, on any given day, what you look like at the best moment and the best light!

Remember the thread on here where the guy was painting his caravan.....in the nude??

Olddear I'm so glad someone else remembers!

That was an absolute work of art it was a gift that just kept on giving!

It was so funny!!! What was he thinking!!!???

Remember the thread on here where the guy was painting his caravan.....in the nude??

Oh yes, he was a treat with his bare torso and medallion Such a great photo I saved it

One of my friends is OLD and obsesssed with taking selfies and posting them on Facebook. Every single one is taken at arms length from a great height and is very unrepresentative of what she looks like IRL. It's not going well, so I assume the false representation isn't working/helping.

For photos that are actually unflattering I think some people just don't have an eye for presentation and I find that with men and women and what they put on Facebook or instagram.

In terms of online dating I know most people find it a relief if someone turns up looking like their photos and pleasant surprise if they look better.

The worst thing is people putting up photos that are too flattering, make them look ten years younger and three stone lighter. That is not a pleasant surprise. I have to admit only once has someone turned up looking different from their photos but most of the men I've met seem to have a recurring problem of women who've posed and airbrushed the years away to then find a completely different person in front of them.

I wouldn't judge a picture unless it was inappropriate or stupid (I hate when they stick their tongues out for the camera).

To echo Bant and Shatners...

Women's profile pics can be just as bad, if not worse. Who on earth decided that Zoolander style pout was attractive ? And if you use soft focus or airbrush, I just know that you've got a fair share of wrinkles ( I don't mind wrinkles, we all get them as we get older, but I do mind trying to hide them )...

Snapchat filters should be banned. End of. And if I ever go back to OLD I am going to take a selfie with a flowery crown filter and weirdly altered eyes because "women fill their profiles with them so they must think they're attractive"... Kind of what it says to me is "I don't want you to see what I really look like ).

And clear up behind you FFS...

Oh, and those pics where the woman is an aspiring TOWIE extra. That just screams "hard work"...

And EVERY single woman in her 40's seems to have an obligatory Yoga picture. WTF ? Either show me a pic of you folded up like a pretzel so I know I'm going to be dating a freakishly flexible sex goddess or don't bother. Actually, downward facing dog is acceptable. ( And for those MN'ers who will crucify me for that comment, it is tounge in cheek. Well mostly .

I personally love natural pictures with a non posed smile, showing you doing something you love. Nights out are fine, a sneaky shot someone took of you reading a book when you weren't aware... Natural and normal do it for me. But OMFG smile !!!

Wow... No wonder I quit OLD last weekend .

I can't believe the number of men who put up pictures of themselves with their elderly parents .

I have 2 selfies on mine, one glammed up and one natural, and 2 group photos, cropped to show me in the middle, one is full length. I'm smiling in all of them. I think mine is ok. No yoga or horses or filters.

I remember on Tinder seeing lots of female profiles that had no photos at all, just memes or cliches. Or there would be three photos, all in group situations, in which at least TWO of the women were in all the photos, so presumably you just had to know by telepathy who had the profile.

I think Galla has it spot on. No filters, one "glam", one "natural", one full length and smiling not pouting. I'm 43 and could imagine a lot of women in their early 20s doing the whole fake tan, fake eyebrows, nothing but pouty selfies because so many seem to follow the Towie generation but I was astonished to see so many women in their late-30s doing nothing but pouty photos. Just WHY??

I get the impression that many men believe that women don't care about looks because they are not 'visual' like men are
Also he probably signed up after viewing porn in which ugly older men with stick legs no arse and a flabby paunch have sex with attractive slim young women
in short he believes that women need a man their life, so much so that hot young housewives in your area want to fuck you now
He just has to throw up any old pic and he'll be flooded with offers
Deluded old scrapper blokes on the internet
😄😄😄😄

You mean I shouldn't believe those adverts Peaceout

Damnit !

No doubt your reasoning powers can resist the siren song Rock but many neglect the lashing to the mast step and are dashed upon the rocks😮

I get the impression that many men believe that women don't care about looks because they are not 'visual' like men are

I get that impression too, that they think women care about personality but very little about looks. But personally I find how a man looks (and especially how he looks naked) is very important to me. I'm very visually stimulated (especially sexually) and am as "shallow" in that respect as any man.

I get the impression that many men believe that women don't care about looks because they are not 'visual' like men are
Also he probably signed up after viewing porn in which ugly older men with stick legs no arse and a flabby paunch have sex with attractive slim young women
in short he believes that women need a man their life, so much so that hot young housewives in your area want to fuck you now
He just has to throw up any old pic and he'll be flooded with offers
Deluded old scrapper blokes on the internet
😄😄😄😄

Now it all makes sense Peaceout. What a brilliant post! But since 80% of male profiles are like that, its a bit scary. At the other end of spectrum the very good photos tend to be, how can I say, rather full of themselves.

What to do .

I suspect there is more to it than that, perhaps many men feel that the whole process of taking and selecting a flattering photo is a feminine pursuit and they just feel odd doing it?

Possibly also an age thing, younger blokes where the culture is different may have better profiles?

At least the awful photos likely mean what you see is what you'll get. They won't turn out to be a foot shorter and 15 years older than they looked in the photo. Hopefully!