The pill turned me into an ogre tonight and now I'm sitting here drinking gin and feeling sorry for myself

[HarrietKettleWasHere]

At least, I hope it's the pill, otherwise I'm just not very nice.

And poor DP has decamped to his mate's to watch the boxing because I was in an awful irrational rage. Triggered by the following things:

1. we are going away tomorrow and I didn't feel DP was showing enough enthusiasm.

2. I had to get up at 7:30 to go into work while he got to sleep in, have a leisurely breakfast and go to the gym

3. I rang him at lunchtime to see what he was up to later and he was in the supermarket and crap on the phone anyway so I thought he was being evasive and I felt like an inconvenience for phoning

4. when we both came back to our flat he thought there was an 'atmosphere' (tbf probably there was as I was in a foul mood about nothing in particular) so we had a strained hour together before he went out

So far pathetic and irrational. I am like this about two days out of every month. I do not want to dripfeed, but, I shouldn't be on the pill at all really- it gave me a pulmonary embolism a couple of years ago (not this brand) I then got the coil. Wheh they measured my cervix and put the bastard in I passed out in agony. I thought it would settle down eventually but it made me look 5 months pregnant, felt like a bit of barbed wire scratching at my uterus every day and they wouldn't take it out so I paid to go private to be rid of it. My normal GP wouldn't prescribe me the pill but the private gynaecologist basically worked out a 'least risk' one and said the chances of another embolism was like lightning striking twice. So now I'm on mycrogynin which is mostly fine except turning me into a monster occasionally.

And usually DP is very understanding, but he cracked tonight and has stormed out leaving me with my gin. (Not enough to get even vaguely wasted and I won't be going to the shop so it won't cause too much damage)

Anyone else being absolutely horrid on their pill?

Disclaimer: I don't want to be off it and use condoms- I took the pill in the first place as my periods are nasty fuckers. I can't discuss with my GP as she won't prescribe me the pill!

I need to text DP and apologise but I'm stubborn.

*I get the turning meatballs thing. I was a monster on the pill, DH brushed past me in the kitchen one day and luckily I wasn't holding a knife at the time......

Nothing is worth feeling that way.*

It's hard to believe isn't it but it really can get you like that.

You write about yourself in a very odd, detached & helpless way. Like the way a sexist man would write about women.