Please read and help me I'm feeling so low and need advice and a general hand hold through this shitty time
Me and DH are struggling at the moment. About a month now and every emotion going I'm feeling so empty and numb. I'm crazy for him and could never ever ever imagining not loving him but he's recently said that he's confused about how he feels and what he wants in the future. That his life isn't how he imagined it would be. He's got the wife and kids that he wanted the family life ......Maybe having a midlife crisis I don't know but one thing he did say was that he feels he's dragged me down to be a person I wasn't when we met and that he wishes I would meet someone who could make me happy and that I would fall in love with. So then he could see me happy 
Now to me that sounds like he wants me to be the bad guy if we were to split up? That I'd be the reason and he would be the victim surely?
I've told him that I will make things easier for him and that If he wants to call it a day then I will ask for a divorce and I won't make it bitter but I can't stand knowing that this one person I care so much for doesn't feel the same towards me.
I've been a mess but my friends have picked me up and I'm feeling strong at the minute. Can't say that I will feel strong when d-day comes and he "confirms" that it's over but for now he just keeps saying that I'm getting ahead of myself and that he wants us to work . Arrrrrrrgh I'm getting so many mixed signals and to be honest I feel like I'm being dangled waiting around for him to make up his mind. I feel like I'm worthless and that if he truly loved me he wouldn't have to wait around to see what he wants.