Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

DH viber snapchat messenger apps

38 replies

thiscannotbewhatithinkitis · 13/04/2017 21:52

I've put this in chat but haven't had any replies - I've found out my DH has downloaded these apps & they are now deleted. He says he doesn't remember downloading them but may have done it if someone at work mentioned them. He was really defensive but now has gone quiet. Why would he use these? I've not used them so no idea how they work.

OP posts:
esk1mo · 13/04/2017 22:03

there is a way to check if your DH has used these apps recently, if he has an iphone.

go to settings on his phone, then battery, and it will say which apps have used battery in the past 24 hours and past 7 days. if they come up then he has been using them.

not to be harsh but these apps are usually downloaded in secret to sext/send pics and are rarely used innocently, especially if married.

Original poster
thiscannotbewhatithinkitis · 13/04/2017 22:14

Thank you esk I've just checked but I've been looking at them on his phone today so they show up as using the battery. I just don't know what I'm expecting him to say.

OP posts:
esk1mo · 14/04/2017 00:32

what about the last 7 days? if they havent been used throughout the week then hes probably telling the truth. alot of people use
snapchat innocently, to send silly pictures etc.

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 14/04/2017 08:08

Viber if I remember rightly, is just another app like whatsapp.

Some people prefer viber over whatsapp.

Snapchat is you can send pictures/videos to friends from your phone list. You normally put filters on them ( butterfly halo, dog face etc ) snapchat often do a "special" filter like if a movies being released they did a Harley Quinn filter back when suicide squad was released.

I wouldn't be suspicious or worried if my DH downloaded these apps.

ShowMePotatoSalad · 14/04/2017 08:27

esk where is the evidence for this? I once downloaded Viber on the recommendation of a workmate, then deleted it because it was crap and hardly anyone I know was on it.

Unihorn · 14/04/2017 08:31

I've had all of these Confused
Viber is because I can make calls over WiFi when I have no signal.
Snapchat because it was just one of those apps everyone seemed to have and I wanted to know what it was.
And Messenger is attached to Facebook and has to be downloaded separately most of the time?
Nothing strikes me as suspicious here so I assume you have more reasons to suspect. He may have been defensive because they seem quite innocent to most people so he may have wondered why you were o suspicious.

NashvilleQueen · 14/04/2017 08:36

We use Snapchat for the silly daily filters here. Recently heard radio prove saying it started out as a platform for explicit pics as they aren't saved but it's now become more about social networking and exchanging funny photos/chatting. On its own it wouldn't be an issue for me. Haven't had viber so can't comment.

Trills · 14/04/2017 08:36

I once downloaded Viber on the recommendation of a workmate, then deleted it because it was crap and hardly anyone I know was on it.

I have probably done this more than once with different messaging apps,, and if you asked me "do you have Viber?" I'd probably say that I had never used it.

Original poster
thiscannotbewhatithinkitis · 14/04/2017 08:38

Thanks Kungfu I think my suspicion was because he denied knowing what they were or downloading them even though they were on his App Store.

OP posts:
Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 08:40

The PPs explaining how they have downloaded them with good reasons prove the point though. They can say why, and they're not defensive.

Yet this guy can't remember? And is defensive.

I'd be trusting my instincts.

Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 08:42

I'd be very unimpressed if my boyfriend denied knowing what all three were.

One, maybe.

That's some coincidence that he managed to download THREE messaging apps without knowing what they were, huh?

Original poster
thiscannotbewhatithinkitis · 14/04/2017 08:42

Thanks for all your replies. Like most of you say, it's probably completely innocent. If not, I'll come back & let you know!

OP posts:
Okkitokkiunga · 14/04/2017 08:43

What made you go through his phone? TBH as an innocent person if my DH went through my phone and questioned apps I'd downloaded and deleted I'd be annoyed/defensive too. Unless he could give me a good reason for why he felt the need to go through my phone. Then we'd need to fix the trust issues.

So why did you go thorough his phone?

Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 08:43

How do you innocently download 3 messaging apps when you don't even know that they are messaging apps? Hmm

Keep your eyes open.

Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 08:45

I'd be annoyed, but not defensive.

In fact, I'd hit the fucking roof at someone going through my phone.

I'd still be able to say, without being defensive, why I downloaded them.

Dontsayyouloveme · 14/04/2017 08:46

Sorry but in my experience defensive equates to guilty!

NashvilleQueen · 14/04/2017 08:47

Also cos all our iPads/phones on my account things arrive on my phone which DD has downloaded for iPad. Usually Furby connect of a dragon breeding programme.

Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 08:48

Out of interest: how many other apps were on his phone that he couldn't remember what they were, but must have been a conversation with a work mate?

Cos it's funny how they were messaging apps that he couldn't explain, not Candy Crush, huh?

Okkitokkiunga · 14/04/2017 08:49

Though if you were annoyed at someone going through your phone perhaps your first reaction wouldn't be a rational and calm explanation Ellis

Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 08:50

And there you go, Nashville - genuine accidental apps include dragon breeding Grin (must look that one up for my daughter!)

I don't buy that he has downloaded 3 separate messaging apps and doesn't know what they are or why he downloaded them.

Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 08:53

Okkito you're right I might not be calm. But I wouldn't be defensive, I'm pretty sure of that.

I had viber for about 2 days 5 years ago - the suggestion of an ex boyfriend (ex then, too). We used it once for a call, he moved on to WhatsApp and I followed him there. I can remember this, and I could happily tell my boyfriend who would say "oh the one who lives in NZ now, who had a baby last year?"

Claiming not to know what they are + defensive = suspicious as fuck.

As I said - if I were the OP I would keep my eyes very open.

kathkim · 14/04/2017 08:55

In itself, this is nothing to worry about, but if you feel he is acting funny and you are feeling suspicious in your gut about it, keep your radar up.

NashvilleQueen · 14/04/2017 09:06

Ah no they aren't accidental. My DD deliberately downloaded to her iPad (with my permission) but they sync onto my phone. So there are apps on my phone which I haven't personally downloaded and sometimes don't immediately notice. My children are 8 & 10 hence the dragons but if there are older children on the same account it could be more grown up apps.

That said I think all this comes down to trust your instinct.

Ellisandra · 14/04/2017 09:09

I meant accidental as in not intentionally added to your phone by you. You're able to easily explain what happened without getting defensive though!

It's a good point from a PP, what led you to looking at his phone in the first place.

ShowMePotatoSalad · 14/04/2017 09:13

Ellis it took me a while to remember I'd actually had Viber. I had a vague recollection of the name then a few mins later remember that I'd downloaded it then deleted it. If someone asked me out of the blue I might have had a similar reaction to OP's DH. I often download then delete apps. If I was being accused of something I might well be defensive because I would feel I was needing to defend myself.

Swipe left for the next trending thread