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Original poster

pregnant lap dance

53 replies

lovingmumhood · 07/04/2017 18:04

It's my husband and my second wedding anniversary in June and we have a nine month old and I am 22 weeks pregnant.

On our anniversary I will be two months off giving birth! So I will have a big bump.

I've wanted to give him a lap dance quite a few times and this year we said we wouldn't spend any money on anniversary being we are low income and tight budget. I tried to give him one before and he loved it but about two thirds of the way through the dance I totally psyched myself out and chickened out of it.

My question is how do you have the confidence - especially with a bump!

I was thinking of wearing nice undies on the bottom half and a huge white shirt so when I reveal my bum and boobs (sorry tmi but there you go) I can still cover the bump since I don't actively find that to be a 'sexy' body part being that it is my baby.

What can I do to get confidence and be sexy even as a human basketball? :O totally not 'that girl' normally.

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 07/04/2017 20:27
Confused
histinyhandsarefrozen · 07/04/2017 20:29

I read the post very differently flupi.

Planning how, in three months time you can strip for your husband, seems the very definition of low confidence to me (sorry op)

I don't get why you don't just take him upstairs this weekend and twirl around a bit. You'll get better with practise!

thebakerwithboobs · 07/04/2017 20:29

Could you perhaps have a boudoir photo shoot done instead? Doesn't have to be expensive and you can chicken out half way through and he'll never know! I've seen some gorgeous ones-the photos don't have to feature your bump at all.

GeekyWombat · 07/04/2017 20:30

OlympiatheQueen Why? Heaven forfend a pregnant woman wants to have sex and do something fun!

EyeStye · 07/04/2017 20:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

histinyhandsarefrozen · 07/04/2017 20:37

I don't really get it. Op lives with him and is presumably having sex with him regularly, I can't really understand how taking her clothes off (slightly more slowly than usual!) in front of him is such a big deal?!

Original poster
lovingmumhood · 07/04/2017 20:38

I did a boudoir photo shoot for his wedding present lol and even let them use my nude photos for their online portfolio! So I guess I'm coming across more prudish than I am :/

I am both completely mental to some people with what doesn't scare me but a total overthinker as well

the reason I am doing it so far in advance is because I like to plan things, it makes me feel better, so I start looking into things always pretty early!

and the reason I am doing it for our anniversary instead of just as a random thing is because I know that we can have the house to ourselves on our anniversary with my mum taking our son and make it a special evening, for a special occasion rather than just random (I am not exaggerating when I say we are low income).

I definitely do have low body confidence but at the same time I like to feel attractive, I like to be intimate with my husband and I know that if I do it, AFTER I've done it I'll feel great. :)

I will try that EyeStye :) just got to think of how they see us rather than how we see ourselves.

OP posts:
Original poster
lovingmumhood · 07/04/2017 20:49

histinyhandsarefrozen

it's just because when we have sex etc it's BOTH of us on display and it's something together, not all eyes on just one of us.

but then that is exactly why I want to do it, a sexy surprise.... but at the same time that's the bit that makes me nervous.

OP posts:
histinyhandsarefrozen · 07/04/2017 20:51

But it's only his eyes - unless you're planning to invite in the rugby team!

Original poster
lovingmumhood · 07/04/2017 20:54

histinyhandsarefrozen and that's what I have to remember :)

just got to try and not over think (and I am the queen of that)

OP posts:
LokisSister · 07/04/2017 20:58

I'm envious that you can still dance when you're pregnant! I'm 32 weeks and can barely walk up and down the stairs!

Good luck and have fun Wink

AssassinatedBeauty · 07/04/2017 21:02

You could get him to sit there naked whilst you're dancing so that he's on display as well...

Original poster
lovingmumhood · 07/04/2017 21:18

LokisSister thanks :) I'm sure it won't be the most graceful thing I've ever done lol but I'll give it my best shot

AssassinatedBeauty that is not a bad idea! or at the least in his boxers.. even the playing field out :p I like that

OP posts:
iloveruby · 07/04/2017 23:20

I think for this sort of thing to work you need to be confident as there is nothing less erotic than watching someone nervously do something which they think 'should' be sexy when they clearly aren't enjoying it.

Obsidian77 · 07/04/2017 23:29

I'd be surprised if anyone thinks you have to be pure and virginal when you're pregnant, that comes across as a bit judgey Hmm
I went off sex during pregnancy because I was exhausted and had PGP. Oh, and nausea for months followed immediately by raging heartburn.
If you feel sexy, beautiful and want to celebrate your gorgeous pregnant body then good for you, hope it meets yr expectations and your DP is bound to appreciate you making the effort.
By 7mo I was beached on the sofa in Asda pyjamas and could not have been less interested in sex.
Each to their own. Smile

Original poster
lovingmumhood · 08/04/2017 11:33

Obsidian77 I just meant it often seems like people think it's bizarre for a woman to want to be sexy in pregnancy, or somehow inappropriate, which I don't understand.

I'm not normally super into sex but I find that when I'm pregnant it increases! Even though I am uncomfortable in alot of ways physically with the stuff you mentioned, for some reason it sparks something in me lol

I also spend most of the days in pjs in pregnancy so I know it will be an even bigger surprise for him haha :D

OP posts:
Emboo19 · 08/04/2017 11:52

I craved sex in pregnancy, more so than normally (until the last 6 weeks and that was only because baby would move into a awkward position and it felt really uncomfortable).
I also wasn't very big and kept going to gym and running until the last few weeks.

To the lap dance.....I love to dance, and I'm pretty confident. Years of ballet and doing dance shows etc (I've actually just started back at ballet)
Never actually given a lap dance, I do dance round the kitchen loads though and my bf kinda digs it lots of kitchen sex. I'm not one for planning or organising stuff though, we just go with the flow.
Confidence will definitely be your best friend as well as good music. I wouldn't go for anything overly sexual. Something you enjoy and find easy to move to, would be best.
I also don't think I'd hide my bump, he knows it's there, maybe one of those baby doll things (I'm crap with lingerie) with a bra top and the chiffon dress but over your bump. You could always pull the cups down to show your boobs!

StartledByHisFurryShorts · 08/04/2017 12:08

Oh, do it!

I do think you're planning it ridiculously far in advance but I'm more an "immediate gratification" kind of woman. Smile

Just a thought, are you going to have any sexy underwear that actually fits you by that stage? Doesn't sound like there's the budget to buy anything new. (Does Ann Summers even do a maternity range? Wink ) You may need to get a bit inventive.

And YY to what a previous poster said about having a sense of fun about it. I'm fat, middle-aged and kinky. I really find a shared sense of humour is essential.

Will you be able to giggle about it if it all goes (possibly literally) tits up?

Cricrichan · 08/04/2017 12:22

What about a pamper session with massage, oils etc. You could do each other and have a happy ending?

Original poster
lovingmumhood · 08/04/2017 15:42

yeah I think overly sexy RnB music or something would make me feel stupid, probably I'll do something a bit lighter :)

I work out quite a bit so am in alright shape and fitness, don't have too much lingerie but all my bottoms will fit fine and then I have a big white shirt where I probably won't wear a bra to be honest (don't like traditional cup bras).. when I wear lingerie it's normally something lacey on the bottom and not alot on the top, with one of his shirts or something - more that style than matching sets

I am a far-in-advance planner but we definitely are completely comfortable :) There have been many giggles in the bedroom, we've been each other's only partners and been together since 16 so there's been more than enough chances for embarassment where we just laughed alot :D

I like the idea of a dance being an intro to a pampery session then if I start to feel stupid half way through I could just get on with the massage or whatever but make it all seem deliberate, I can definitely do that :)

OP posts:
MapMyMum · 09/04/2017 19:13

Choose a song that you like and makes you feel sexy or has a good beat to dance to and go for it. I think overthinking here is what foiled it the last time.
Really shocked at some of the responses here. Your body is sexy and perfect just as it is, pregnant or not, your dh knows it and you know it, you just need to believe it more. I think the fancy pants and shirt is a good idea but dont make it too obvious youre hiding your bump else it might get awkward. If you unbutton the shirt do it all the way. He loves all of you! Go for it and have fun

Original poster
lovingmumhood · 09/04/2017 20:12

MayMyMum thankyou :) that's a lovely response.

good point about the shirt... I asked him last night if he thinks it's weird if women try and be sexy when pregnant and he said NO!! lol

definitely overthinking is what did it, I'll try and be more relaxed this time :)

thankyou for your response :)

OP posts:
Belle4201 · 07/08/2021 01:52

Literally just tried "making a moment" for my husband, put on some music, got into the mood,even got myself into a sexy little outfit, danced around and basically humiliated myself. He turned the tv on and everytime I got close to him he looked super annoyed and looked over me to look at the tv to watch Ghost Busters.. His body postures said everything. I'm over 5 months pregnant and have wanted to do something like that for him for a long time and thought since we're away just the two of us, it would be the perfect time. It took everything I had to put all insecurities aside for that. That's the last time I'm ever even going to think about doing anything special like that for him.
I really hope if you ended up dancing for your husband( to the original poster of this thread) that he actually enjoyed and appreciated it. I really do. It takes an incredible amount of guts to do something like that. I often wonder wtf is wrong with my husband, like he can have a porn addiction and use our line of credit to pay for it but when his actually wife tries something sexy he wants nothing to do with it.

Zerrin13 · 07/08/2021 22:01

This is one of the funniest threads I've read on her for ages

thiswaswrittenaboutme · 07/08/2021 22:20

Misread the heading as tap dance and wondered why on earth!