Husband put his hands round my kneck

[CleverQuacks]

Hi all,
I don't no why I am writing this as I know what I need to do. I think I just need to get it out.

Before I start, so as not to drip feed, I should say I have BPD. Part of this means I experience intense mood swings from incredibly low, to manic. When I am manic I become very silly and childish. I am on medication to manage this and it helps but I still sometimes suffer manic episodes.

Last night whilst me and my husband were lieing in bed I was being quite manic. For some reason I thought it was funny to make up silly pet names for my husband. These weren't offensive names just things like "my little alligator". At the time I found this hilarious and despite my husband asking me several times to stop I continued making up names and laughing.

My husband became increasingly annoyed with me and after about 10 minutes lept on top of me and held me down by the neck saying "you need to stop". I panicked and bought my knees up, kicking him in the groin which made him get off me. He then lay down and went to sleep.

This morning I have bruising on my shoulders and neck. Neither of us have mentioned it.

I am in shock. I know I was being silly but he has never reacted in an aggressive or violent manner before.

I know I need to leave. This can't happen again. But where do I go?!?! What do I say to people?!?! And what about the kids. I don't no how I will cope with them and my mental health.

He sounds terrifying

Before I get flamed what he did wasn't right but the ops behaviour wasn't right either

You can't goad someone into committing assault if they are a decent person.

It was assault.

complicit ?

Reported

Wait are you seriously reporting me for using a big word?

No. I'd be saying it was assault still. Anyone putting their hands round someone's neck is dangerous.

For the relationships board, this is sounding more like aibu! Strangulation is extremely serious. It doesn't matter how annoying you were. He had a ton of other choices. Leave the room. Go for a walk. Whatever. Strangle your wife? No way acceptable no matter what the perceived provocation.

You also say you can't talk to him because he's out getting drunk and he hasn't said anything about it despite your bruises.

This is a dangerous situation.please speak to women's aid.

He's not sounding like a great husband and father. He's sounding like a financially, emotionally and physically abusive drunk.

No. Not for using a big word, for fuck sake, but for being an apologist for domestic violence.

I am reporting you for being a DV apologist. Do you deny it ?

I'm very against domestic violence I'm not an apologist, i was just saying what happened in my case. I'm sorry I wrote anything and I'll have my posts removed

If your husband attacked you then he is a domestic abuser too.

He asked her to stop. He could have got out of bed. Instead he got on top of her. Strangled her hard enough to leaving bruising. Then fell asleep.

That's abuse. There was no panic. Remorse. Shock. He slept. Ignored it this morning.

This pattern will repeat.

Flowery if he self harmed that's on him. You didn't drive him to that either. I think you are taking on a blame that's not yours.

If op's manic behaviour has been annoying her dp, he should be thinking about sleeping on the couch, moving out for a while, or if it's been going on for a long time, maybe even a divorce.

He shouldn't be grabbing his wife (or anyone for that matter) by the throat!

Flowery
What your husband did seems horrific for himself and foe you . But he (as far as you've told us) NEVER put his hands on your neck. That's the difference

For*

Anyfucker ive had my posts removed. I've also reported that I'm being unfairly targeted by your good self as being a dv apologist against my right for free speech on the site.

Op hope you get on ok, if it's a pattern then obviously do what's best for you and your children, I understand how hard it is to think of leaving.

You don't talk to him you call the police get your injures documented. And believe me any DV unit will take chocking as serious.

Call women's aid.

It doesn't matter what you said there is no excuse. It is shockingly easy to kill someone by placing your hands around their neck.

Doesn't matter how good a Dad you think he is right now, how good will he be when you're dead and he's in jail??