What do you miss about your ex? (Lighthearted-ish)

[OhBlissOhJoy]

I miss his strength. I've had to ask more favours from friends than I am comfortable with and pay people to move heavy stuff around. It makes me feel like a fragile little woman and I hate it.
I miss him doing odd jobs around the home (see above). Although most the stuff that needs doing now he should have done when we were together and didn't.
I miss sharing expenses and not having to worry about whether I can afford the mortgage and bills.
That's not lighthearted is it? It was meant to be.

I miss the happiness I used to feel every time that I had to work late/had other plans and didn't have to spend time with him!

Changing lightbulbs.

I'm glad to see so many of you are referring to your current DP/DH, I can't imagine letting another man into my life after STBXH. I don't think I will ever be able to trust anyone again. I miss being trusting.

Getting rid of spiders, cant think of anything else

From my very first love I miss bank holiday sundays in the local pub. We used to get pissed as farts then wobble home.

From the ex after him I miss his sharp, sarcastic intelligence. And his sense of humour. Which was as dark as mine.

From my 'badlad' ex I miss mad nights doing coke and rude sex.

But non of them come close to DP. I have all those things (tho the cocaine has very much stopped since dcs). He is a billion times those exs. All of them and more. I adore him and our life.

Sweet f* all.

What have I gained from him not being in my life
1 Bathroom availability.

He was. Rather he is vain. I once suggested that he was vain & sang a few lines of Carly Simon's hit:
"You're So Vain" to him.
He almost had a fit 😂😆😉

Escape came more than a decade later.
Gut reaction at the time said "RUN"

I listen to my gut reaction these days.

Life Is good.

@ahamsternest - I love the idea that in a post-recession Brexit Britain, someone would be looking back wistfully at an ex with a free train pass 😂

@Bad it was quite a humble perk all things considered!

At a push I'd say I miss his music collection. Other than that, nothing!

He had four younger brothers who I adored. I suspect that he omitted to tell them that he cheated on me several times, that he was an arse to me when I went through a bereavement and that he was a creep. They've probably been told the opposite.

The drugs. He was the worst person I've had the misfortune to spend time with, but he had access to good drugs and never charged me. Obvs part of his control methods in hindsight, but I was naive about that at the time.

The usual putting the bins out. Emptying the kitchen bin. He used to hoover upstairs after he shaved his head. But he is terrible at DIY the amount of odd jobs I got sorted when he moved out.

I don't miss the cheating or the stress he put me under though.

Light-hearted reflection from the lovely OhBlissOhJoy has made me take a very serious early morning proper look at my current life and times.

So I now know what I want & need in my life. I currently have a lovely nice no-game playing boy/man friend.
However I always look for problems and red flags; presuming that they MUST be there somewhere.

I need to lighten up for sure.

Enjoy what I have & move on from the ex vain turd I was married to and had two delightful children with.

Lsoup

He used to de-ice my car on his way out to work every morning. And, he let me wipe my nose on his sleeve when I forgot a tissue for the dog walk

He had a lovely big cock.

Nothing at all. I've even read through this thread thinking it might trigger a wave of nostalgia ....but no.

Can't decide if our relationship was always crap. Or if I just can't remember the good times early on because the last few years were so bad.

His ability to not give a shit what people thought.

His sense of humour was the same sarcastic dark twisted vein as mine.

His shared sense of adventure. We could just get in the car or on a plane and go.

His lack of fuss/hang ups on bodily functions. It was easy to be natural around him.

The shared history of experiences and bringing up DS. We split when DS was 9 so had a lot of years together watching him grow.

My DP is very caring, but extremely shy. And of a different culture. I love him deeply but in a different way and probably more respectfully. But there's less "comfort" and more deliberation and consideration in the relationship.

I feel guilty about saying that now.

Only his champagne.
But I prefer Prosecco now so that's fine.

I miss the DIY stuff he did (I need to put sealant around the kitchen sink and just cant get round to it! And paint a bedroom) - and he was quite good at cleaning the shower!! And it was nice to share the chores such as dog walking and hoovering.

But I suspect thats just laziness talking as I know I'm better off without him around :-)

He was v good at diy as he is a builder
Other than that only the way that he annoyed me so that I could have a good shout and release some stress
Dp is the complete opposite in every way and possibly a different species

Have thought long and hard about this - nope, still nothing :)

The sex.
His shoulders.

I miss him stroking my hair in bed at night.

On the plus side, he was a total nob with dubious personal hygiene, and nowadays I get all the dick I can handle.

His family. His sisters had four kids between them, all born while we were together. I was there holding them all within hours of them being born, and they grew up knowing me as Auntie Frieda. It still really hurts knowing that from their point of view, I just totally disappeared from their lives with no explanation.

He had a big dick. I kind of miss that....

Him mowing the lawn. My garden is big and I hate doing it myself