Longest time on receiving end of silent treatment??

[ItsOooohSoQuiet]

Halfway through day four.

You can't have a perfect relationship with a twat who ignores you for days.

Half an hour is what I give it. After that they should grow up or fuck off.

Can you get the contact details from him and chase yourself.
Not what you should need to do but I'd have taken control of it by now.
If it's a one off then it's a bit different.
But say it's happened before and can last 2 days.
You really really to put an end to this bullshit!

'Can you get the contact details from him and chase yourself.'

How can she do that - with the 'silent treatment'? Hold up sheets with one word written on- like 'Love Actually'?

"He's fine around the DC, they've not even noticed!"

I would think that they have noticed, you perhaps like to think they have not. Children do notice far more than many adults give them credit for. Silent treatment like this is another form of emotional abuse designed to exert power over you as his target.

I could dig around for paperwork next time he's out. I'm sure there's something here somewhere.

Enjoy the peace and quiet

I would think that they have noticed, you perhaps like to think they have not. Children do notice far more than many adults give them credit for. Silent treatment like this is another form of emotional abuse designed to exert power over you as his target.

They're mostly at school/college/in their rooms/out with friends. Can go days with only seeing my eldest for a total of 10 minutes!

Enjoy the peace and quiet

I am!

You are waiting for him to go out so you can hunt for paperwork for house you are BOTH buying? Rather than just y'know be able to ASK him?

They see a lot more than you care to realise. Their dad's silent treatment of you is perhaps also why they are rarely at home as well, its not just the ways of being a teen.

What do you see in this man OP: why have you put up with this at all from him. Did you for instance grow up seeing similar treatment meted out to your mother?.

Do Exh's count? Despite 50:50 parenting, have not spoken to each other in any form for over 6 months

*Silent treatment is never ever about silence or being silent.

Its another form of emotional abuse designed to place the aggressor in a position of control whilst silencing any attempts of assertion.*

Yes.

The silent treatment is always about punishment. He probably wants you to make a scene about it so he can act the victim. Tell him in a calm voice that you are ready to talk when he is ready. DON'T APOLOGISE. Get on with your life and emotionally detach (as much as you can).

I had a work colleague (in her fifties) about 20 years ago whose husband of 30 years regularly gave her the silent treatment he kept it up for a year once from Xmas to Xmas - we used to get updates.

'Their dad's silent treatment of you is perhaps also why they are rarely at home as well, its not just the ways of being a teen.'

This occurred to me too. I reckon my dad would have said we were totally unaware of the atmosphere at home when my mother was freezing him out for weeks on end, because he kept up the happy families act, but we most definitely were aware and it was bloody miserable.

I think you've normalised this as it's part of your every day life with him; if you are going to excuse it then why come on here.

I'd suggest you sit him down and tell him no more of it, he's punishing you for what, because he's stressed???? We all go through stress; he's using the stress as an excuse to treat you like crap but you seem to think it's ok so don't really see what you are asking.

So you had a nice calm chat with him asking him if he wouldn't mind phoning the mortgage company/solicitor/estate agent or whoever and he said no need they said they'll be back to us soon, and then he said you need to know sooner is stressing me out and decided to give you the silent treatment?

Not a chance that you tore him off a strip for being lackadaisical and he's waiting for an apology, but you're both too stubborn to back down?

Your first scenario was pretty much how it went @HarmlessChap. No arguement beforehand.

Perfect relationship? Clearly not
Childish, silly behaviour that I would and have not ever tolerated.

Your first scenario was pretty much how it went @HarmlessChap. No arguement beforehand.

In which case are you sure you really want to be buying a house with him?

Ate your children deaf and blind ?

Of course your DC are aware of it. They are either avoiding it by getting out, or normalising it (as you do) or both. It is abuse.

Think my dad managed between 6 weeks to 2 months when I lived in the same house as him as a teenager. This year he disappeared to another country and doesn't speak to any of us at all.

As others have said, this is abusive behaviour and your children will have noticed. They are no where near as dim as some parents think. They will be avoiding home to get away from such a toxic atmosphere.

My parents used to do this to each other for months and months when we were kids. My brother and I were forever whispering to each other about when it might end. In fact, I remember us being terribly worried one Christmas Eve about whether they'd be speaking on Christmas Day. It was awful, I will NEVER do that to my kids. Both my brother and I suffer with anxiety and I am sure it is related, makes me feel all kinds of weird just writing this. Silent treatment sucks!

Please make arrangements to move yourself and kids and not him.

If you can't afford to move without him, then get yourself a divorce going and tell him he has to go.