Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DP embarrases me

63 replies

mousetrap07 · 02/03/2007 14:07

I feel a bit guilty writing this but not sure what else to do.
I've been with my DP for around 2 years, when we met he wasn't exactly a "trendy" type but nothing too out of the ordinary. We lived at opposite ends of the city so he used to come and see me as he had the car, One day I suprised him and turned up at his house and he was wearing pink slippers, I made a joke about it and he said they were his mums but he found them comfortable so asked for them when she wanted rid , I said "does it not bother you that they're womens?" and he said "no, why should it matter?" I still found it funny but left it there.

Anyway on the odd occasion that I went I noticed more and more that he had strange habits when it came to clothes, he would wear a really feminine apron when cooking, the slippers and one time he even had a womans cardigan on saying it was his ex's but it was comfortable .

Anyway all this was last year, in the end we moved in together, firstly into my house and then we rented a place together, I asked him to get rid of the slippers and he said I was being ridiculous, he did however agree to get rid of the cardigan when I made out it upset me being his ex's!

Thing is my family quite often come down and I've just found out that they've all been having a good laugh about him taking the piss out of the slippers etc and last week a friend of mine brought my son his ps2 games back and saw DP's slippers and ran into the kitchen laughing asking me if he'd put them on as a joke.

We're having a group of friends over tomorow night and I'm dreading it as DP said he will cook, this means the apron AND the slippers will make an appearance and to make matters worse there will be male friends here tomorow too who are more likely to take the piss.

I know it sounds awful but it really embarrasses me, it winds me up that he doesn't care about people laughing and doesnt care about me feeling uncomfortable. Am I out of order to ask him to bin them? I've offered to buy him new ones but he says he likes the ones he has, stupid as it sounds it's really starting to make me feel bitter.

OP posts:
Caligula · 02/03/2007 14:10

Are you afraid he's a transvestite?

I think I'd feel a embarrassed about this if I suspected it was a sign of something a bit deeper.

Cappuccino · 02/03/2007 14:12

swop him some comfy black slippers for some of your underwear

see how it goes

bandstand · 02/03/2007 14:12

can you not laugh about it too?

yorkshirelass79 · 02/03/2007 14:13

Message withdrawn

ScottishThistle · 02/03/2007 14:13

Sorry but I think I'd have thrown out the pink slippers ages ago!...Hide them!

have you actually sat down & told him how much it distresses you?

SSShakeTheChi · 02/03/2007 14:14

can you not get someone's dog over to mangle them?

bandstand · 02/03/2007 14:14

chuck em out, or buy youself some man's slippers

mousetrap07 · 02/03/2007 14:15

I did used to laugh about it but I suffer from social anxiety and the fact that everyone now seems to find us "wierd" and hillarious really doesnt help, it just annoys me that he can't just wear normal stuff.
He bought some huge wooden clogs from holland for instance and wears them to the corner shop etc, the last time I went with his we were laughed at by a group of teenagers, I was terrified as I honestly thought we were going to be attacked.

I know it shouldn't bother me but it does and he doesnt care how I feel.

OP posts:
bandstand · 02/03/2007 14:15

where is his mother

whiffywarthog · 02/03/2007 14:15

give him a cath kidston catalogue for christmas.

mousetrap07 · 02/03/2007 14:16

His mother is still alive and well so it's not as if its sentimental value

OP posts:
whiffywarthog · 02/03/2007 14:16

ok - just ask him straight - are you a transvestite?

is your lipstick more worn down than usual? underwear put back in the wrong place?

ScottishThistle · 02/03/2007 14:17

Sorry but I've tears running down my face at the clogs!

Seems like he's just a bit different in the fashion sense, maybe you had better just accept it!

Cappuccino · 02/03/2007 14:18

oh now I have read about the clogs I am not so worried about his womens clothing issues

he just wears odd stuff

I think your family sound bloody horrible to be honest if they've been taking the piss out of him behind his back - I hope you're talking about 12-year-old members of the family, not grown adults

SSShakeTheChi · 02/03/2007 14:19

the clogs are worrying. He can't pretend they're comfy

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 02/03/2007 14:19

well I'd imagine he bought the clogs so he could sing that song, " a little mouse with clogs on, going trip trippity trap on the stair"

mousetraps?

clogs?

feeling bored praps?

SpawnChorus · 02/03/2007 14:20

PMSL Sorry if you're for real. Does his mum have very big feet?

Cappuccino · 02/03/2007 14:20

i don't see what is worrying about clogs

I have some garden clogs I often wear to the corner shop

they are easy to get on and off

must admit that they are very discreet however and look a bit like crocs without the holes

I can see the convenience

aDad · 02/03/2007 14:21

arf

expatinscotland · 02/03/2007 14:22

Each to their own and that, but for me, when he was just my boyfriend and he wanted to wear the slippers I'd have been out of there. Instant dealbreaker.

I'd ask him point blank if he were a cross-dresser - nothing wrong with that if that's what you're comfortable with, he's comfortable with, etc. - and go from there.

ScottishThistle · 02/03/2007 14:22

Where do you live?

< sorry still laughing about the clogs >

What colour are they?

frumpygrumpy · 02/03/2007 14:22
expatinscotland · 02/03/2007 14:23

Aye, those would go over a treat in Scotland .

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 02/03/2007 14:23

a

mouse lived in a windmill, in old amsterdam...

I saw a mouse, where, there on the stair, where on the stair, right there. A little mouse with clogs on, ...

ScottishThistle · 02/03/2007 14:24

If a man wore clogs in Scotland he'd be the laughing stock of the whole Country!!!