My mother was an alcoholic and it's ruining my adult life

[bizarrelyjubilant]

I never used to think it had impacted on me so much. I put my lack of success with everything down to school bullying, down to my own bad choices and down to everything really.

But then I found this which was like reading a list of my own characteristics to the point where I've never actually had a relationship because I'm terrified of intimacy.

The question is what can I do about it? I am not sure about therapy; I just can't see how one hour a week is going to change entrenched things that have been there twenty, thirty odd years?

Well, Mindfulness is based on that buddhist idea that it is healthiest to keep oneself in the present and not waste precious nervous energy of things of the past (they cannot be changed) nor invest similar in to the future or events that may never happen (because none of know what the future holds).

I do think while that is good advice and helpful in many situations (for, say, stress management) it is not enough for people damaged by a dysfunctional upbringing whether caused by alcohol or something else.