DH does his hobby constantly yet has the cheek to be moody with me beccause we're living separate lives??

[RubyDoobey]

He does is hobby every Saturday from 8am until at least 7pm. Often the hobby is done on a Sunday too for similar hours. Plus random evenings in the week.

He's had the audacity yesterday to be in a bad mood because 'we're living separate lives'. He is moody because he likes to go to bed at 9 or 10pm every night, even weekends, as his hobby is tiring. I prefer to go to bed a bit later, usually between 11 and 12.

He won't take any responsibility for the fact that he's out all the time, leaving me to deal with the DCs (aged 7 and 12) alone. When he does have any time not at work and not out doing his hobby he never wants to do anything nice with us all anyway, and is moody and tired and grumpy.

I'm fuming with him!

I've been in a similar situation op and have literally just separated from my dp. After a while you get sick of them acting like they're doing you a favour by ever big home at all.
It doesn't sound like you are asking the world. He knows how upset you are but chooses to live his life how he likes and expects you to fall in line. I think you deserve better.
Do you want your dc to grow up thinking that men get to have all the fun and women are just in the background, skivvying about? What sort of relationships will they go on to have?
It's hard I know but he needs to understand how ground down and lonely you are. If he just doesn't care then you may be better off alone

"Utter pollock" Yes, he sounds very shellfish

Should not laugh, should not laugh.

OP, he's already disengaged, stop doing anything for him at all, wait to see how long til he notices. What an idiot he is.

Sorry, i wasn't trying to belittle the post, just raise a smile.

The upshot is OP that he knows you're upset, but he doesn't care. If he cared he would do something about it by altering his behaviour. He is being utterly selfish, while thinking that he has simultaneously foster a myth that he is a good husband and father because he says so.

He has absolutely no respect. He bats away discussion because, at heart, he doesn't actually believe you should have a voice. Fuck that. He is being vile. It's as if you don't exist, and I'm sure this is a pale shadow of the equal partnership you entered into when you contracted marriage with this man. By putting no value on you, your hard work and care and everything you represent. The sad thing is that this means he also puts no value on what he is potentially throwing away. It is only when it actually happens that he will realise the magnitude of the contribution you make to his comfortable life. It is sad, and when and if he loses his marriage, he would still blindly and implacably blame you for destroying it.

I could have written your post.

I lost my last birthday to coaching commitments (paid, but still)

I've played second fiddle for years and I'm regretting being a doormat.