Cheating?

[IWantToWinTheLottery]

I have another post on here and some of the responses have raised more questions surrounding this matter so I thought Id leave another post to get others opinions, just because I'm interested to see what others views on this matter are.
Obviously having sex/sexual contact outside of a monogamous relationship is cheating and since being on mn I've learned about ea but what other actions would you class as cheating /being unfaithful. What do you class as the difference between simply cheating or unacceptable behaviour. For example would you have a problem with you dh/dp watching porn, what the difference between that and cam girls (is it the interactive aspect that then takes it to a different level) Would you be happy with your partner visiting strip clubs/lap dancers, or would it only become unacceptable /cheating if they then paid for a private dance.
Is it that seeking sexual arousal from elsewhere (even if the actual act of sex doesn't occur)is the problem, would this be a deal breaker?

I have no desire to go to a strip club. I have, however, conversed with and read the disgusting misogynist words of men who pay women to service their dicks.

If they're getting their dicks serviced then that's not a proper strip club. Sorry my existence disgusts you so much but there is absolutely nothing wrong with what I used to do.

Or 90% of the men who go there

You don't disgust me. I am not attacking you. Your defensiveness is misplaced.

DW thought it was disgusting and vile but went on a girly night out to watch some group of male strippers a few months later because it was "different".

Someone said there was no difference upthread, but I think it depends on circumstances. I went to see the Chippendales about a million years ago when they became really popular. It was a huge audience in a proper theatre, so we were miles away. Nobody seemed to be there for sexual entertainment. To me it was just funny and over the top. There wasn't full nudity at any point. It seemed very different to the naked sleazy strip-dancing clubs that are shown on TV dramas. I've never been in a strip club... maybe I'm wrong, but if your wife saw something similar to what I saw, it possibly was quite different.

Neverreturn my two posts are about two different, although related subjects, one led the other. The first was asking for advice, the second opinions. I'm just one of those people who find other people's pov Interesting and my op was asking for opinions based on a specific situation rather than a generic one. Apologies if my op didn't make that clear or you feel I've been aggressive.
Yes on my first thread I did state that my dp RECEIVES porn, on my second thread I defended the point that he doesn'tSHARE porn on the Internet, two very different things I'm sure you'll agree.
I'm sorry to fear If I offended her, that wasn't my intention, I've found her comments/views really interesting, Ive only found two comments on this post insulting and irrelevant to my op, neither of them by the poster you mention

Nobody seemed to be there for sexual entertainment.
So it would have just as entertaining if they hadn't got their kit of then??

Sorry but its still about the objectification of the human form. I actually don't have any issue with people enjoying the physical appearance of others but what I do find disingenuous, and I see this all too often on social media, is when women complain about the objectification of the female body one day but the post a picture of Tom Hardy with his shirt off, accompanied by some some salacious comment, 2 days later.

My friend is constantly putting pics on FB of men 20 years younger with comments like "so would...." etc

It's fucking embarrassing and absolutely no better than men who sleaze about young girls

No double standards here.

No double standards here either, I think it is exactly the same, men with their duck's out, women with their muffs out(sorry couldn't think of a nicer word lol) and I don't think it's about having a 'laugh' or you'd go see Lee Evans, let's face it they arent there telling jokes with their bits hanging out are they.
Look the human form should be enjoyed, I have no problem with my man enjoying and appreciating beautiful women, but surely there had to be boundaries? I was simply asking for opinions based on whether people had definite lines and, if so,, what they are and why.

Sucks 😂

Oops that was meant to say 'ducks' not sucks!! Ffs.

My lines are ... Weird and complicated I guess.

I have no issue in theory with the watching of porn as a couple, when single, or during prolonged absenses. But frequent use of porn in place of sex and intimacy is a no no for me....the ethics of the sex industry disturb me as well (although obviously I don't know case by case details).

I have no problem with going to a strip show as part of a group activity arranged for somebody else (stag/birthday etc) but wouldn't be okay with regular use, it being his/my idea, singular person visit, private interactions/touching etc.

However...on a more personal level...things like revenge porn/receiving or sending pictures etc...I have zero tolerance. Not acceptable to me. (There'd have to be an immediate "woah Buddy keep it to yourself" response and cooling of friendship for me to be even a little okay with receiving even an accidental pic!)

Emotional or Physical connection with anyone but me - complete no go unless previously discussed and agreed as a couple (which is highly unlikely to happen tbh).

I used to be a pushover with boundaries in relation to things like this but over time I have developed and understood my limits and they are solid and unmoving. I consider myself pretty lenient all things considered.

For me porn is fine, both together and alone-for both parties.
Strip clubs are fine, exdp and I would often go together as it was next to his house and open very late, I think unless you have been in the specific club it is hard to tell the atmosphere though.
Threesomes are fine is fully consensual with someone who neither partner has an emotional attachment to.
Any emotional involvement is a huge deal breaker for me, be it an overly friendly hug, text or call.

My brother in law runs a few strip clubs so I've been there with my partner.

If I hadn't of been and seen it for myself I think that I would feel slightly jealous of my husband going but they're really not what is portrayed on the tv etc.

Suppose it depends on what 'level' of strip bar they attend, you can get some really grotty strip clubs, where the women will do 'extra favours' or you go high end where the atmosphere is completely different. The women are not all over the men like leeches.

My husband has also been to Amsterdam, I didn't worry at all, I think I just trust him, I know he's not a sleaze.

It really is your personal opinion and also only you know your husband and what his view of women are and the level of trust between you two.