Can he refuse to buy me out of the mortgage?

[Whathappensnowthen]

We are separating. It's going to be a long process as there's lots to untangle, almost everything is in joint names, including the mortgage. I understand that neither one of us can force the other to leave the property, fair enough. I am more than happy to buy him out (finances permitting - I have an appointment coming up with a mortgage advisor to check this).

However, yesterday my husband told me that, as I was the one insisting on a separation it should be me that leaves. I don't feel any particular ties to the house, so in that sense I'm not fussed, but he doesn't want to buy me out. He just wants me to go. We have no savings, so there's no way I can go anywhere else without some kind of deposit. We have 4 young children and as a result no family or friends have room to put us up, even for a short while. Can he refuse to buy me out?

Just some advice on the tax credits front - please claim these now. Yoy are separated. You are entitled to them.
Additionally, from April 2017, you can only claim for 2 children, regardless of the fact you already have 4 children. The new tax credit rules mean that for any new claims after this date (as well as any children born after this date) only 2 will be paid for. Trust me when I say, you need to claim them now. At the very least, before April.

THIS. With bells on.

I was just about to post the same thing. Ring tax credits today, just ask them for the form as it can take weeks to come through. Then call and explain your situation. I've just been through this and I would also send a cover letter with your tax credits claim explaining your situation. Include the date that you separated - my claim was backdated to the separation date, rather than the date he moved out. That extra months payment helped enormously.

Be prepared to send them bills and evidence of bank statements. Start untangling things straightaway. Any joint accounts that can be split for example.

Sidenote regarding tax credits and childcare vouchers. If you receive vouchers through work and use these to pay your childcare, you won't be able to do this alongside claiming the childcare element of tax credits.

Do see a solicitor. I didn't have to pay until all my stuff was completed.

How would you be able to afford a higher mortgage though OP? I don't understand. You are saying that you have o money but then in the same breath you are talking about getting a new mortgage. Have you checked out what a bank will lend you in your sole name. It may well be a lot less than you think and insufficient to allow you to stay in your home.

If either one of you doesn't want to keep the house and wants it to be sold then unless the other one buys out that share of the house (which requires cash equivalent to half of the value of the equity plus the bank being willing to allow the sole owner to take on the whole mortgage) then the house will have to be sold and you simply split the equity between you.

If neither of you have a spare penny, how would he be able to buy you out??

Friends in similar situations have sold the family home and moved out to live separately.

PPs: I got the impression that OP might not be working FT now but when she does she'll be earning considerably more. Not enough for £1300 of childcare to be comfy, but more.

OP, if that's correct, I agree with a PP in that he's financially abusing you as well.

A remortgage in one persons name is not straight forward, as I am discovering! My ex left 7 years ago, he has 'given' me the house and the equity in it. However, I can't get a remortgage on my own as I don't earn enough!

I had to sell my family home too to split the equity even though I had two small children.