Survey to men particularly?!

[Bluejeans16]

Just looking for a glimmer of hope in humanity (particularly the "man" part of that word:
Do ALL men hire call girls or cheat with chat lines and webcams or if you find DP does is it worth hopping on the next train only to find we're all on a merry-go-round of swapping partners in life when they get caught out?

Moral dilemma for me - I feel like many people find partners/husbands cheating and airing their heartbreak on MN so gives me little hope for even bothering trading up ...so to speak.....
Any men want to give anonymous perspective please?

Eww can MrCreosote be banned? What kind of an arsehole comes onto a women's website and makes misogynist comments about prostituted women, who are overwhelmingly the victims of CSA by men? This explains why they have such low self worth that they then go on to work as prostitutes. Many of them are working to support their children too. And many are trafficked by men.

Ok. I have no interest whatsoever in hiring women whose paid job is to pretend to enjoy sex and find me sexually interesting. I think, morally, a woman is entitled to sell sex and a man entitled to buy, but I will never be a customer for those services. It repels me.

I have been with my wife now for.. hmm... 25 years+, and while I had the opportunity for flings/affairs with women who were interested in me I did not take the opportunities up. However, when I was single in my early twenties, I was the 'other man' for a number of married women. So, my personal experience is that women no less are 'up for it'.

Society seems to have this.. odd twist.. that 'he made her do it' when it comes to female sexuality.... either the husband or the lover are the real actors. He was 'bad'. He 'tricked' her. But women clearly have their own minds about who they want to have sex with and why respecting fidelity takes a back seat to their desires.

Man. Never had sex with a sex worker, never cheated. However, I'm not monogamous and I don't enter monogamous relationships. The key thing is communication and compatibility - I think too few people genuinely examine in detail what their sexual desires actually are, discuss them with their partner and then act to stabilise the relationship on that basis. They just try and jam themselves into the traditional mode and find themselves acting badly when they don't fit.

I'd say most men will cheat given the opportunity

I actually disagree. I don't think most men would.

More do I just think a men cheat either. More oand more of the end of relationshipseason that I know of are due to the woman rather than man cheating.

IT happens too often but no, I don't think it's a given.

People rarely post about their amazing relationships and even if they did - not cheating is a bare minimum.

Generally people post about problems in relationships and that tends to be cheating, addiction and lying in general.

Mr I'm glad you don't want to cheat on DW. But honestly calling a prostitute a slapped? She's just trying to make money, there's no need to call names. It's pretty disrespectful.

Oh and Mr just because a woman offers to sleep with a man doesn't make her a bad person. I presume you call married men who sleep with prostitutes all sorts of nasty names. Or was the poor man coerced?

Is it a case of, by 40, most of the 'good' ones are married and not available. Therefore you have a higher % of cunts in the available space. They are probably more active on OLD as well.

I am a divorced man, & never been on a dating site, been on a web cam chat, ( apart from mumsnet ones ) used a prostitute, dont watch porn, not a drug user, don't cheat or abuse women, & feel I am a normal person that will help anyone in times of need. So be relieved there are men that are devoid of the lowlife syndrome in most areas...

Sarcasm. Sorry if I have offended you and others for calling sex workers and yes, I have a lot more names to call the dirty married dicks who use them.
Carol. Have you not thought that, maybe, if a man is single at 40+ that it might actually be the fault of a cheating woman? All women are not whiter than white.

MrCreosote your posts and intellect are both vile and so is the character whose name you have chosen to take. No, you are not funny.

It is not correct to label sex-workers as you have done. The sex industry is huge and growing exponentially. That is worrying in itself because it indicates a growing market driven by demand. One I strongly suspect is driven by men's appetite for, access to and belief in the story of porn. This is a virtual world not a real world, so its 'kind of OK' to receive those images down from the sky and to make oneself feel better by saying those girls are slappers. Your word Creosote but you are, sadly, part of the problem.

The real world is that in the Czech Republic, Hungary, Romania, Colombia, Thailand, and anywhere else where misogyny is rife, young women are encouraged to support their (often lazy) families by stripping for the benefits of mostly western and/or affluent males with time on their hands, to perform on camera or in personal meetings. These girls, are coerced into the industry because they are physically beautiful. Wow....who would have thought this would be a handicap. They could have gone on to get degrees, become doctors or teachers, housebuilders, who knows. Maybe one of them would have discovered the cure for a particular cancer. But we will never know that because the sex industry, driven by demand, is robbing so many women out of the opportunity to take control over their lives.

Is it a case of, by 40, most of the 'good' ones are married and not available.

I was with my wife (then girlfriend) and a bunch of her female workmates at lunch, many years back, I was the only guy there at the time. One of them asked me if I knew any men who were 'available' (this pre-dated OLD). This was, I was to find out later from my wife, a common topic among them... finding men and sharing stories about the ones they found.

I told her I did not know any (well enough to recommend anyway). She then declared something like 'Just where are all the good men?' It was more a general complaint than a question, it drew a couple of laughs from the other women.

Unfortunately I was really tired that day, and coupled with my often blunt manner I shrugged my shoulders and blurted 'With the good women?' Difficult lunch that one.

I think probably 50% of men would cheat if given the chance.

However I can't believe the posters who have gotten all defensive when MrCreosote said he'd rather be with his wife than a prostitute. If you were ever unfortunate enough to find out that your husband had sex with a prostitute or OW (as in a lot of posts on this site sadly). Are you sure you wouldn't be calling them slappers amongst other choice words?

If you were ever unfortunate enough to find out that your husband had sex with a prostitute or OW (as in a lot of posts on this site sadly). Are you sure you wouldn't be calling them slappers amongst other choice words?

Errr.....No!

MoonandStars2 I am very sure that I would not.

I would definitely not call a prostituted woman a slapper under any circumstances

Even if a woman did call an OW or prostitute a slapper, they'd be angry at them and denigrating s specific person, rather than casually insulting a whole set of women. There's a big difference there.

I have cheated before, when younger and in a long distance relationship. But when in a happy relationship, even when it was long distance, I didn't look at another woman once, they just weren't interesting, and I'd far rather just chat with my other half about her day, on the phone, than sleep with someone else.

The thought of paying for sex is a bit repulsive to me, to be honest. I'd rather be with someone who actually wanted to be with me, not the contents of my wallet. Never have, never will.

Thank you moonandstars. I did apologise for calling sex workers but, think they must have missed that.
What I don't understand is that, some people went on the defensive when I called someone for selling sex to married men but, nothing said about calling men "twats".
Double standards?

I did apologise for calling sex workers but, think they must have missed that.

No you bloody didn't. You claimed, after being rightly called out on your woman-hating language, that you were being "sarcastic" and "sorry if you were offended" - a non-apology if ever I heard one.

Being sarcastic. Of course you were, you poor little misunderstood lamb.

Women who earn money by sleeping with men are sex workers.

Men who cheat on their partners (by sleeping with OW or with sex workers) are twats.

The same would apply to male sex workers or female cheats.

It is a fairly clear distinction.

No, not double standards, as others have pointed out.

You're just painting yourself into a shitty corner, to be honest.

Notthetype. When I mentioned sarcasm in my apology, I was talking to the previous poster who was called sarcasm something. I had no intention in offended anyone.
RobinSnood. The reference at the beginning of this thread was calling most men, "twats". Not just the small percentage who pay for sex.
As for one person calling me a woman hater, ha. All I can see on here is a lot of man haters.

Oh really? So it wasn't even sarcasm, you're just a full on woman-hating, sex-negative plank who thinks he's the moral arbiter of women's sexuality?

GET OUT THE WAY LADIES HE'S MINE I SAW HIM FIRST!!11!!

What would you call someone who drops their knickers for money? 😀
I would call them people deserving of respect first and foremost, usually with complex social and mental health problems as a result of a life of awful abuse.
[tragic emoji]
95% have alcohol and/or drug dependency to blot out the dreadful reality of their situation. They do what they do to subsist and support their children as best they can, not because they are second-class nymphomaniac citizens who love being a laughing stock among others ignorant on the subject, including educated people like Richard Curtis who should show more sensitivity in their writing.

What I don't understand is that, some people went on the defensive when I called someone for selling sex to married men but, nothing said about calling men "twats".
Double standards?

Yeah because calling a man who cheats on his wife a twat and calling sex workers slappers are the same thing.

You asked earlier what else would you call a woman who drops her knickers for money?

sometimes trafficked, sometimes underage, sometimes abused, sometimes frightened, sometimes drug addicts, sometimes unsafe. sometimes forced, sometimes desperate, sometimes exploded, but never ever "some slapper" (I said sometimes, I know it's not always)

if my dh cheated with any woman I'd blame him, he's the one who made promises to me and it would be the end can't see myself forgiving him, if he paid for sex I'd not even entertain forgiving him, I'd be dissapointed that he saw women as commodities that you can buy, I know there's ones who enjoy the job, who have fantastic lives but they make up a minority and many wouldn't be selling consent if they didn't have to, the thought of him buying consent from a woman who could be selling it for any of the above reasons turns my stomach. Bought consent makes me feel uncomfortable, I know that not everyone feels like that though, but DH does and that's important to me (and he's not lying to keep me happy) .