Does anyone live in a house owned by their partner?

[RobinSnood]

Just wondering how you feel about it?

My partner bought our house outright for cash. I believe he is committed to me, and he involves me in all decisions etc (also in the decision of which house to buy), but somehow I don't feel committed to him/our home. I want him to let me buy a small proportion of it (would be about 7%, maximum) but he thinks I'm being silly. Am I?

PaterPower He bought the house 18 months ago for us both to live in as well as any future children (we have been together around 6 years). I had an equal say in where we bought. I know I should have made more of an effort to sort out my financial and legal position then (I really don't need to be told!) but I didn't and am now regetting it and trying to sort it out.

SilentBatperson what I said about marriage wasn't my reasoning for not getting married, iyswim, it was just a musing.

It's not too late to sort it out now OP, but I think you need to make it a priority.

How is he committed to you at all?. You are his partner but that brings with it no legal status whatsoever. I do not think he is as committed to you as you are to him, you are far more reliant on him and he has used that power to his advantage.

I guess you never sought legal advice prior to your partner purchasing his property for cash. I have to look at you in all this; why has it taken until now for you to realise that your both financial and legal positions are so very poor?. Did you want to believe his promises and or bury your head in the sand?

He bought the house for both of you to live in you write; well infact its for him to live in and you to pay rent on. That is money you will never see again. Your legal position is so very poor and if he were to throw you out, he would be well within his rights to do that.

I would also think he will actively block any attempt you make to have any share of what he really does see as "his" property. I do not think you will be able to come to any sort of agreement with him particularly as he calls you silly.

I would also seek legal advice and pay someone to properly advise you now. I would also consider your own future within this relationship.

My husband had our house (mortgaged) before we met, pre children we split all the bills but he paid the mortgage alone, now married with 2 kids and he pays it all, I look after the kids and work a few hours for pocket money.
I still feel like it's my home.

I would stop paying £500 and just pay 50% of the bills. Take what is left and put in a specific "saving for deposit" savings account.

If he bought the place for cash, he is just making money off you, as he has no mortgage to pay for.

I don't charge my OH of 6 years any rent, as its my place. he saves the cash he would have spent on rent towards a future place. We share the bills and food costs. Does mean he has "no claim" but then he has also saved £30k or so in rent over 6 years as well.

@gloria

Yes! A financially astute person who is well aware that living independently (according to OP) would cost her more than £500 in rent alone, would rather carry on contributing (towards a subsidised condo with bills included) and save hard towards her own property.

I do wonder how people like you get through life?

1% stake doesn't change anything for op rather than validate her emotional sentiment. Houses go up and down in value, and the market is too unpredictable to sit on 1% equity. Instead invest in cheaper cheaper property with much higher equity & if possible get her partner involved to fulfil her need to be financially linked.

Mine had a very small mortgage remaining when I moved in. The day I moved into the house it was our home. All our money became ours and we took advantage eof the fact that together we had more, particularly as we had a small mortgage and I no longer had rent etc to pay. The mortgage is long since paid and I still live in what is technically 'his' house. It has never caused us any issues. I have no need to own half on paper, it's my home.

Sure OP, of course, but my suggestion that you get professional advice both from a specialist solicitor and someone qualified to discuss optimum investments with you stands. I'm not saying you should get married necessarily, or that you should purchase a share in the property.

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt user1408 and assume you're American due to the use of the word 'condo'.

£500 a month could be going towards her own mortgage and she'd have something to show for it.

In the SE of the UK, particularly in London, property doesn't go up and down it just goes up and up.

OP is unlikely to be able to afford to invest in another property given that she's paying six grand a year for this one.

But the thing is gg, the £500 a month couldn't be going towards a mortgage if op can't afford to buy property on her own. (And as per earlier post, I don't think it's that easy to get a buy to let mortgage these days if you are not also an owner occupier, which would rule out buying to let in a cheaper part of the country.) So the £500 a month may be the cheapest option for the op - it's either that or rent elsewhere.

If op is higher earner it may not be in her interests to get married particularly as the effect of marriage on her 'claim' on the house and any other assets is unclear, as another pp has said. Op, I agree get advice from someone who specialises in cohabitation/marriage, and then decide what you want to do. There is no guarantee that dp will want to do it as well, but at least you'll have a starting point.

@ Gloria

The point is, op would still have to contribute towards bills. So she does not have £500 a month all of a sudden.

She intends to buy 1% at roughly 70k. I currently live in SE and it's a myth that property prices will keep going up. Also, I lived and worked outside the SE and I know 70k could buy you a ready to move in rental flat with high equity and decent net yield.

OP has a very good arrangement and she should avail the situation and save for her own nest egg. Even, if she "plays her game right" she could even get partner to free up some cash in form of "soft loan" towards her own nest egg & put a hefty deposit down or buy outright all in her own name.

Let's look at it realistically:

she cant afford to buy equal share on current house which makes it unattractive proposition for someone who owns outright (and doesn't need the money as OP stated).

OP admits the house would rent for 2k ish a month

She also admits they both incur bills and spends to which she contributes the £500 and partner adds to that, which I presume is more - unless OP says otherwise.

I'm afraid OP is about to ruin a very good arrangement. As for getting married,1% equity will not impact how she'd be treated by the courts if they eventually gets married then divorced. She'd be favoured by the courts anyway given time together, age of kids and other factors.

Neither would 1% equity affect how her partner would treat her in future if they split whilst not legally married, the 1% is insignificant to someone who owns 99% outright! So he could still be a dick if he wanted to! As Even without an income he'd still be able to raise finance and buy out the 1%.

To think OP doesn't have rights because she's not legally married is naive. They've lived together for years and have kids ffs.

OP, please seek professional advice. This is a place you come to if you need reasons to get divorced! It's disrespectful of some of you to accuse OPs partner of living A subsidised life at her expense! I guess that's come from stay at home mums who don't contribute at all. Op is contributing at a subsidised level as she admits, and it's better for her to buy rather than push on this silly 1% equity on current property.

No dc user.

And op may indeed have very few legal rights - maybe just those of a lodger/licensee to reasonable notice? but that is something she needs legal advice on from a specialist lawyer, to see if her contributions may have given rise to a beneficial interest, as a pp has suggested.

Op might also be able to make a dependency claim on dp's estate in the event of dp's death - but again that is something she needs legal advice on.

We don't have DC user1480613212. And we are now discussing & doing some calculations regarding the possibility that I could take out a mortgage and buy 20/25% of the house as way to get me on the housing ladder and also make me feel more invested in the household decisions. (Although looking at predictions for the London housing market is definitely giving me pause for thought.) Will definitely get professional advice.

I live in DH's house which is just in his name. He bought it shortly after we married and I don't contribute to the mortgage or bills as I don't have much income of my own (most of my benefits were stopped when we got married as his income is very high). We view it as our home and make all decisions about it together. Our finances are viewed as shared although we keep separate accounts, it wouldn't make sense for us to say he or I contribute a certain amount to bills or the household as it's all 'our' money. I wouldn't have moved in with him without being married first.

Apologies OP, just realised no dc. Obviously mixed up my replies.

It's sensible at 20 -25% and well done! So your dp is not as selfish or horrible after all
( as insinuated by some on here )

Be very careful what you do with the advice you get on here, you don't realise what you have till you loose it.

I guess that's come from stay at home mums who don't contribute at all

Seriously? You thought it a good idea to insult SAHMs on a mother's forum?

I'm not one myself, but most of the SAHMs on here could tell you that 1% of 700 grand is not 70 grand - that would be 10%.

And that the OP has never mentioned 1% - but 7% and 25%.

And that without marriage or a cohabitation agreement, she has very few rights. You're already acknowledged your mistake about children, that you appear to believe she has rights due to the length of their relationship is another one.

Ciutadella you can still get BTL mortgages - but it's more tricky than it was.

You need a deposit of between 25-40%, and the rules on mortgage interest tax relief have recently changed.

Thanks gg, it looks from my quick internet search as though btl mortgage options are more limited (expensive?) if you don't already own a property, but not completely out of the question. So might be another option for op (or anyone else in this position) to consider.

I moved in with my DP into the house he bought before meeting me (mortgaged). We worked out the mortgage + bills etc and I pay exactly half. This works out to £400 a month and we then take it in turns/share the food shopping. Otherwise our finances are pretty separate. Previously my rent alone cost me £700 a month.

It's a short term situation though, we've both lived alone so long so we wanted to make sure we could live together! Turns out we can and it's all going brilliantly, but I have enough put by to get myself a rental should it go tits up. The plan is to use the extra we are both saving on living costs by cohabiting to save a deposit to buy a place together. DP wants to rent this current house out. It sort of both does and doesn't feel like my home, but that's partly because we already know we're going to move on as soon as we can.

This is a tricky one: from your partner's POV, why would he risk his financial security in a mortgage free house for your benefit? Esp being disabled - and if you truly cared for him why would you want it? You have the option to keep earning, he dies not

I own a home (I'm a woman) and I have to say I would not consider allowing a partner to live with me 'rent free' and 'feather his nest' at my expense. Goes without saying it's different for a married couple who decide for a parent to stay at home: that's a choice made as a family.

£500 is not a large contribution: I think half of bills would be more than £100,so leaving your partner a few hundred to live on (I'm calculating £100 each for council tax and gas/elec, then there is water, broadband...)

I say that having paid more than £100 per month for bills in a flatshare some years ago, and current bills more than £200 a month

Where could you rent for £400 realistically and would you be happy to live there?

I can see that you should have some financial security of your own: can you save/buy on current income? Live with your family for less?

Do you feel your partner is exploiting you to have an income? If you left, what would he do for money?

Would he (and you) consider a lodger for income to free some of your income to invest in a place of your own? I would float that suggestion if only to see his reaction...

I think that your own investment and potentially marriage (where his pre-ownership and disability would give him more rights) are the solutions here

CAB info on legal differences between marriage and just living together.

Sorry OP but I don't think your situation is a good one. I think you should either stop paying £500 pm to him and just pay for say the food shopping or the bills. I really don't feel comfortable that he is asking for that money each month given he has no mortgage.

I wouldn't try to buy a "share" of his house - I will get shot down for saying this but I'll say it anyway. If things didn't work out between you and you owned say 25% of the property, plus he relied on you financially due to being disabled / unable to work, I'm not even sure how you would go about getting your 25% stake back iyswim. You would possibly need to go to Court to force a sale but they may take his disability / reliance on you financially into consideration before making any ruling. I think this would put you in a tricky financial situation. Maybe a solicitor reading this can give you advice on this as I wouldn't know for sure.

I would definitely look at buying your own place and renting it out, as a back up and so you both have a home of your own.

Your original question, yes I live in a house that is only in my husbands name. Totally different circumstances though. We went for a house move four years ago and my credit score was off. I'm a SAHM and have been most of our 20 year marriage so he was awarded the mortgage if I wasn't listed. I'm not a financial contributor anyway so it didn't matter. I'm fine with it. He sometimes thinks about it and says we ought to change it but I'm not fussed.