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Original poster

Am I right to be angry??

45 replies

1803h · 10/12/2016 18:03

Hi all, am new to mums net and heard it's really good for all kinds of advice... My OH is a really big fan of sports and it's coming up to his 30th birthday so as a surprise I managed to get him ring side tickets for a boxing match ( they were not cheap) and knowing that I like boxing too I thought we could both go together and have a ball, I would of been so happy to see his face watching the famous fighters he loves close up! However when I surprised him with the tickets he didn't want to go with me but wanted find a male friend to go with, I was upset as all I wanted was for him to be happy & see his face light up and to be able to share that experience with him and make it a memory! He said I was a little sensitive when he told me he didn't want to go with me, I know it sounds petty but do I have the right to be upset over this or should I just let it go & forget about it? I understand his reason for not wanting me to go wit has him was as he thought it may have been to boisterous for me but I reassured him that I was more than happy to go and understood why he was worried but he didn't need to be. Thank you

OP posts:
NiceFalafels · 10/12/2016 18:07

It's fine for him to go with a mate.

TwitterQueen1 · 10/12/2016 18:08

Let it go. I su"spect he would enjoy it more with a male friend - and that's perfectly understandable.

It doesn't mean he doesn't love you, it just means he would prefer to go with a mater. And, tbh, if he's 30, the idea of you watching his face light up... is a bit blah. It's what you do with 3 year olds, not 30 year olds... You bought him the tickets, surely his face lit up enough for you then?

HallowedMimic · 10/12/2016 18:09

It's a bit rubbish to give someone a gift on condition they share it with you.

ElspethFlashman · 10/12/2016 18:09

Tbh you can't dictate how a gift is used.

And I suspect he wants to have a proper blokey evening full of testosterone and that bollocks about it too boisterous is him trying to avoid saying so.

Oysterbabe · 10/12/2016 18:10

I'd be upset too. I think he's been a real arsehole.

birdybirdywoofwoof · 10/12/2016 18:12

I'd be pissed off- if I got tickets for us to go to Rome, or the theatre, I'd expect to go to, obviously.
How is this different?

Scarydinosaurs · 10/12/2016 18:13

I think your gift was his ticket- I would be upset that if I had wanted to go, my DH wouldn't want me to.

Milklollies · 10/12/2016 18:16

IGrin believe you and Rachel from friends have the same problem. This video explains all you need to do for next time: m.youtube.com/watch?v=Fj5l_CZSlok

AmberEars · 10/12/2016 18:16

I'd be upset tbh. In the past I have got my DH tickets to a comedy show / concert etc and assumed we'd go together - I'd have been gutted if he wanted to go with a mate instead. I hate boxing but the OP likes it.

Milklollies · 10/12/2016 18:17

Next time only give him one ticket if you expect to go with him.

RoseOfSharyn · 10/12/2016 18:19

Let it go. I su"spect he would enjoy it more with a male friend

Bollocks!!!! I like boxing and motor racing far more than most blokes. Why would he enjoy it more with a male friend?

Butterymuffin · 10/12/2016 18:24

Has no one other than Amber noticed that the OP says she likes boxing herself? Perfectly reasonable in that case to assume you'd go together.

He's being rude in effectively saying he'll only accept the present under certain conditions. When women express dissatisfaction with a gift on here, they are told to suck it up regardless. Apparently those rules of etiquette don't apply to men.

TwitterQueen1 · 10/12/2016 18:38

I'm afraid I'm laughing at this now. OP - sorry, but you're being a terribly precious snowflake about this.

he thought it may have been to boisterous for me but I reassured him that I was more than happy to go

This is code for - I want to go with a male friend.

Rose the reason I suspect he would enjoy more with a male friend is because he doesn't want the OP to go! Nothing terribly complicated about that. I'm not saying women can't enjoy boxing or any other male sport... FWIW I'm a real F1 fan..

My point is that if you give a present to someone surely it's up to them to decide who they would like to go with? Otherwise you would say, "hey! happy birthday OP! I've got US two tickets to go to XYZ.

TwitterQueen1 · 10/12/2016 18:39

clarification: not happy birthday OP, but happy birthday DH or OH.

Rinmybell · 10/12/2016 18:41

I'd be offended too. I'd let it go, but I would be offended.

Alfiemoon1 · 10/12/2016 18:42

I remember when my sister friends husband bought her 2 tickets for Gary Barlow she presumed it was for her to take who ever she wanted so she invited my sister. He chunnered all night when she was texting him saying what great seats they were lol. Still don't think she realises that he bought them for them to go as a couple

Original poster
1803h · 10/12/2016 19:32

Thanks for the feedback! Women can like sports just as much as men! When I gave him the tickets I did say oh I've got US tickets to go not I've got u a ticket here's plus 1 take who u like hoping he would pick me ha.. I've let it go as I do want it be an great night for him. But uno was a little offended that's all!

OP posts:
sooperdooper · 10/12/2016 19:37

I'd be pissed off too - his ticket was the gift! I'd say if he wants to take a friend that they owe you for the ticket

birdybirdywoofwoof · 10/12/2016 19:38

Thats a good idea Sooper. Yes, 'sell' your ticket to the mate, OP!

Original poster
1803h · 10/12/2016 19:40

Haha milklollies that's video is hilarious.. next time I will use that.. I have a surprise trip booked to Barcelona in April I will be making sure am going to that one as it's a holiday for us both!!

OP posts:
Original poster
1803h · 10/12/2016 19:43

Birdy I can't really expect his mate to pay for his ticket can I? Oh by the way u owe me 500.00 for the ticket if you go Confused ! I will just have to expect that he's going with a friend and I've treated his friend too :) !

OP posts:
EllaHen · 10/12/2016 19:48

I love sport too. If I got dh two tickets to see Celtic, I'd be going with him.

Your dh is being sexist in his argument that it'd be too boisterous for you and rude in his leaving you out to take a friend.

LadyLothian · 10/12/2016 19:52

I'd be irritated by this too. 500 per ticket is a lot of money to spend on someone else's ticket.

I think he was pretty inconsiderate of your feelings too. You put a lot of thought into the present.

I'd be hurt.

flapjackfairy · 10/12/2016 19:59

I agree at 500 quid a ticket you should have gone!

Nocabbageinmyeye · 10/12/2016 21:02

Treating a friend to a £500 ticket??? Not until hell froze over, if he wants to take a friend he find a one with £500 otherwise he goes with you, feck that!!

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