Phone passwords

[cuppateapls]

My boyfriends phone is password protected, and I have no idea what the code is. I absolutely hate it. He also won't give it me, accusing me of snooping and saying I should trust him.

I am curious of what other peoples relationships are like do you know your partners passwords etc?

Didn't try to have a sneaky look, my phone was cut off so I picked up his to make a call then realised.

He does groundworks, so is outside a lot, I've come to the conclusion really that his phone spends most of the time in his pocket.

If you have no intention of snooping then it doesn't matter that you don't know his pass code, surely?

His excuse for turning off the text message notification previews is completely pluasible- both myself and my husband have it set like that for the same exact reason or in case one of us receives a private text while showing a friend/family member a photo or whatever . I would not find that suspicious at all.

Myself and DH know each others pass codes but if he didn't know mine and was pestering for it I would be annoyed.

You sound like you don't trust your DP.

Too bad. If you don't trust him, then do him a favour and end it.

DH and I have our phones passcode protected - it's a basic thing to do to keep the kids and anyone else unwanted out of our business. We've never felt the need to share our codes with each other, just as we don't share each other's email or mumsnet passwords. Even in a trusting relationship, people are entitled to some privacy.

My texts don't appear on my front screen either - I get texts from my bank etc so wouldn't want those appearing at random while not knowing who might be looking over my shoulder.

DP knows my passcode and I know his, we don't feel the need to look though, although when I was in hospital DP looked at a couple of notifications on my phone which were the bank, but he looked because texts came through and he wanted to be sure there was money in my account to cover outgoings (it was the end of the month)

But even my DS knows my passcode because I'll sometimes give him my phone to look up things or take pictures etc

What would concern me is A, the fact that he's changed his passcode, B, the fact that he's so defensive about it. Having said that, if you snoop regularly, and it's clear that you've snooped otherwise you wouldn't know that it had changed, then maybe he's changed it because he feels he's entitled to privacy.

Dp and I have passwords he's told me his and I've told him mine I cAn never remember it though he has to remind me if he's driving and has asked me to check something

And DH has his own phone, his work phone and a cheap one that he uses when he's running, doing heavy, dirty work etc. He has no need to borrow mine.

I only have the one, but in a pinch, I could borrow DS1's. I'm a bit of a prepper at heart, though, so never without it well charged or a power pack to hand.

We know each other's passwords because it's handy sometimes, but I would be really pissed off if he wanted to read through my messages! I have notifications kept to a minimum because I want to control when I am being disturbed.

Changing his passcode is odd though.

It may or may not be, Gold, or it may be what WannaBe said. Either way, there are problems in this relationship, regarding trust.

Both DH and I know each other's codes as it's useful.

When DH and I first got together I did have trust issues from my previous relationship. I trusted before and shouldn't have so doubted my own judgement after that so it's that rather than it being a mistrust of my DH - hopefully that makes sense!

It was DH being so understanding and fully appreciating it wasn't a reflection of him, just a product of my past, and being very open that allowed me to begin to trust again. I've posted before that I did snoop in the early days and that DH understood that need and is glad he was open because it allowed me to heal from my past more quickly, all because DH was mature enough to understand that. Those days seem like forever ago now and makes me realise what an amazing man DH is to have instinctively done what I most needed, rather than taking offence.

Dh knows mine and I know his, we never go through each other's phones, no need to, we trust each other completely, we also know each other's email password, banking details etc...

Nothing says mistrust more than snooping on a lover, there is no need to have their phone lock code.
That way madness lies. What if you find nothing? Maybe he has a second phone? Do you start following him?
You trust or you don't, there is no love without trust.

are employees sometimes required to change their phone passcode regularly, if they're accessing work emails, especially if they contain sensitive info - does anyone know?

Myself and DH change our pass codes every so often. It's no big deal. Some very suspicious minds on here!

I have know OH passcode and he knows mine but i'd never feel the need to go through it. I don't think he's gone through mine either.

The fact his passcode has changed and his notifications are off is a red flag...

I actually think you're being ridiculous. If I had someone banging on about my password, I'd bin them off. What the hell has it got to do with you? If you don't trust him, leave him. If you do trust him, focus your precious time & energies elsewhere

My DH and I know each other's passcodes as they're both the same. I've never snooped through his phone though, and doubt he has through mine. It's more so we can unlock each other's phones if our DD wants to use the CBeebies app.
If you used to know the passcode and he's suddenly changed it and is now being cagey, then maybe he is hiding something. It doesn't have to be negative though...could it be Christmas present related perhaps?

I have a passcode on mine and DH doesn't know the code. We don't know each other's passwords for laptops either. I have nothing to hide but my friends sometimes talk to me in confidence and that means away from my husband too, not that he'd snoop.

However if he suddenly got defensive of his phone and turned off the notifications I would be suspicious. I think it's red flags im afraid

DP doesn't have a passcode on his phone and always leaves it lying around. But I never check it, and if my phone stopped working, I wouldn't think to use his without asking first.

But, I trust him and he happily texts, answers calls or opens messages in front of me. If he suddenly changed his behaviour, then I would be suspicious.

So I think people saying you don't trust him are right. But for good reason. His behaviour has given you good reason to be suspicious.

My phone is protected because I don't want my email, Facebook, etc hijacked if I lose my phone.

I don't think my husband knows the code but I wouldn't hesitate to tell him if he needed to for any reason.

It's one of those connect-the-dot things and my pattern is very simple so I could verbally describe it to him.

Dh doesn't have a password for his phone. I know his email password and PINs. He knows mine and my phone password. Well he forgets and has to ask again every time he wants to use my phone etc, but I don't hide then from him. The only thing he doesn't have access to and never will is my old lj.

I don't know my DH's passwords although he has a lot of them written down so I could find them if I needed to.

DS knows his PIN and his tablet password. And mine!

So if all else fails, DS can tell me or Dh what the relevant password is.

People do need to change their passwords from time to time, sometimes you are forced to by a website - other times you get an inkling or a feeling that someone has been trying to hack your account so you change your password. I did that recently for my email.

My DH and I don't know each other's passwords. He's always had an android phone and I've always had an iPhone so we don't really know how to use each other's phones and never have any need to. It's never worried me, we trust each other.