My mum is only happy when her boyfriend is here?

[MummytoLeoX]

My mum is in her 60s been with her boyfriend for 10 years now me and him have never got on and my older brothers also dislike him as he has put my mum in a load of debt and is a compulsive liar. I avoid him when he visits because he irritates me and smokes around me. It's just me and my mum that live together which i love as I enjoy her company and she's been great throughout my pregnancy. She keeps moaning that she wishes Mike was here (her partner) "it's so boring without Mike here" and I went to pick up her phone and her messages were left on and she said I miss you so much I can't wait to see you tomorrow. This obviously makes me feel shitty because I'm always in good spirits and enjoy living with my mum we do everything together and she's never that happy. She's just came back from being in town with him now and she's so happy you would of thought she's won the lottery! Am I just being over sensitive? Hope I don't sound like a bratty adult but i just don't understand her.

Yes you're being sensitive. She's an adult. You're an adult. He life has moved on!

You dont understand why shed ve happy about seeing her boyfriend? And your hurt because she cant wait to see him?

I think you need to grow up a bit tbh. Shes allowed a life that doesnt involove you.

You don't understand her?!

She's in love with him. End of.

You need your own place and she needs to crack on making a life with Mike.

I think you're holding each other back somewhat.

Wow I regret posting this now! I did have my own place but had to move back in with my mum when I fell pregnant. If I left my mums now she would be on her own her partner won't move in because he doesn't like paying rent and lives rent free.

She's in like be with her boyfriend. It's not that hard to understand. If you don't like who she chooses to spend her time with maybe you should move out.

Eh?? Your mum needs to have a relationship with Mike.

Why can't she move in to Mike's place?

Because he lives in a old school as a guardian rent free with loads of other people. She would not move in there!

So let me get this straight, regardless of who lives where, you are jealous of Mike?

It's difficult when a close relation is in a relationship with a compulsive liar who gets them into debt.

But at the end of the day she'll have to figure that out for herself.

It's a bit odd to think now you've moved in it should just be you and her.

I'm sure she could cope with living on her own.

Yes, this!

If she's been with Mike for ten years, how come you've only just noticed how happy he makes her?

It is because you've moved in, and now it is 'in your face' and you've got jealous?

I just find it strange when my brothers visit she couldn't care less she doesn't even go to visit them and won't see them for months. But will make sure she sees her partner when he lives just round the corner from my brother.

It's up to your mum and Mike whether they live together. He clearly makes her happy. Do you expect her not to have a life and do everything with you because you've moved home?

Her relationship with your brothers is their business. That doesn't mean she should leave Mike.

I left home at the age of 16 and went to live in Leeds. I've only just moved back now as i fell pregnant and had no choice but to leave my job I'm 21 now. There is a lot more to this story! I guess I just don't like him and wish she had somebody that treated her better.

I never said she should leave him god sakes wish I never bothered posting now

Sounds like it's up to your mum to make her own mistakes.

Your mother is allowed to have a relationship of her own choice. It is normal to want to see you chosen partner frequently.

How is you moving in with her affecting her sex life?

I'd be a bit hurt too given your further posts. I hope I wouldn't be so foolish over such a useless man when I am that age. However it's her life and she only gets one so if that's what makes her happy then you have to just let her get on with it.

Why does being pregnant mean you have to leave your job? Confused..... are you disabled and need your mums help?

Have to admit I'm confused too. Why did being pregnant have to do with anything?

Sounds like your mum is a bit addicted/co-dependent on this loser.

He probably makes her feel a million dollars all the while lying his face off and taking her cash. So she's totally wrapped up in him.

But this is her life and her learning curve. There's no fool like an old fool.