ILs keep buying clothes for dd- I feel really ungrateful but.....

[angel30]

My mil and sil keep buying clothes for my dd, however they only buy things that are reduced and therefore quite often they are really odd combinations or the wrong season ( eg they recently gave us lots of thin, cotton summer trousers )
I feel really really bad for feeling ungrateful.
Its just we end up with pile of clothes that she'll never wear.
I also feel bad as they must wonder why they never see her in the things they have bought.
Sometimes they buy things that are so not my taste that I can't bring myself to dress her in them.
I get all of her clothes from high street shops, I would never spend loads on them however it seems that my idea of what I want her to wear is massively removed from theirs.
What can I do ? I don't want to hurt their feelings but I wish they'd stop spending their money on things that just aren't getting worn.
If only they just mentioned to me that they wanted to buy something for her then I could point them in the direction of some things that she needs.

Actually I think maybe I am just being really ungrateful.

how old is your dd angel?

I'd ask them to buy books instead.

Sorry, I go with the same theory as with horrible gifts given to me by other people. My house is not becoming a shrine to other people's bad taste and neither is ds. At least my mother says whenever she gives something to me "take it back if you don't like it, I'd rather that, than find it unworn in a bag under your bed in a years time". She has never bought anything vaguely dodgy. MIL on the other hand is a bit hit and miss - but really really upsets me when she says, "oh I saw this, it was only £x" - fine, if it's nice, but don't buy a sodding bargain if it's revolting pleeeease. Why, when they can see what you generally dress your baby in, do they insist on still trying to foist their own bad taste/bargain on them.???

My mum went through a phase at the beginning of buying disgusting ornamental photo frames / old second hand chav jewellery etc for DD, saying 'this was a bargain only cost £1' etc etc. She said that I could give it back if i didn't like it, so i said I didn't like it but could give the photo frames to her with photos of DD in for her birthday - she was horrified and said no thank you - she didn't want her house cluttered up with tat like that. This then opened up the chance for me to say please don't give DD anything you wouldn't want yourself!!! So far it's worked - she hasn't dared buy anything else!

My mum buys lovely stuff but some of it is totally impractical and madly expensive. Dd2 never wore her white Dior tracksuit (bought for her first birthday). Or her Ralph Lauren tennis skirt and jacket (for her second).

Stepmil buys Cherokee which is generally great - however I hate the slogan t-shirts and the denim mini skirt with studs for dd1 got binned immediately.

My mum buys about 90% of the girls' clothing. Her taste is impeccable, so I've no complaints there. NO slogans, hoochie clothes or impractical garments.

It's finally occurred to me that my mil is desperate for a grandson, (she has four granddaughters), and that's why she buys black clothes and boy's clothes for my dds.

If my MIL (or mother) buys tastelsss clothes I usually suggest that they keep them at their house for when the dc's come over to play or stay. Works a treat at the moment!

I did get a bit cross with MIL for buying thick brown cord Monsoon trousers last year in the Spring sale, but thankfully they do still fit ds and are really fab and soft.

It was great when we had Gymboree - I loved their clothes and they always fitted so I used to take MIL shopping and point out what I liked and lo and behold she would then buy it next time she was in town!!

dps family buy bloody awful clothes for dd, his mum got her a cream winnie the pooh dress when she was born, horrible colour, and i hate winnie the pooh, she also got her a gold bracelet, dps aunt got her a white halterneck top with rhinestone thingys, and a denim mini skirt, im sure my face said it all, there was no way either outfits were going near my baby!
if im feeling particularly nice i might take a posed picture in said offending outfit, and get dp to email it to them, the clothes then get bagged up and sent to storage, to be slyly disposed of at a later date

my mil has never bought a single item of clothing for my children but my mum buys really lovely stuff for them (usually really lovely, anyway!)

The main problem I have is the stuff that my mum kept from when we were babies and has passed on to me! Some of it is cute and I'm sure they have a lot of sentimental value but they are SO dated and old looking and sometimes quite weird and often nylony and scratchy. I am not going to keep things for my grandchildren to wear- just buy them nice stuff (which my children will probably hate )

my parents and ILS buy loads but..
..i know suggest we go with them..ds real fusspot too..and it means we get what we need too..
it was never too tacky though just overkill on some things..whilst we had lack of other stuff..

we dont live near and make it shopping trip when we vist and am very grateful for it...

say kids are fussy..can you come with?? next time

ssshake, that's working on the assumption that MILs can spot a quality children's book when they see it. not so, with my mil.

I did have a brain wave - I have started a wish list on Amazon for my DD and have told the parentals and MIL etc that it's there for future birthdays / christmases just incase.... It's got stuff on it that I would like to buy for her when she's older (Dr Seuss etc) and there it is all in one place for me to find easily (unless they've all bought it by then)!

Am PMSL at this tthread, too. My MIL buys my DDs the same thing over and over. We have many a garish polyester cuddly toy cluttering up the place (she bought DD2 4 when she was born) and it's pyjamas or a book (always, always Irish legends or a fairy theme) every christmas and birthday. DD1 had 5 Irish legends books when I tidied her bookshelf out last week and 6 resin ornaments on a fairy theme. And this for a girl who plays electric guitar and is into thrash metal....

My mum, on the other hand has the most immaculate taste, and always asks before buying, but doesn't need to. Her gifts are always fab.

runninglate! that's a great idea! I didn't know you could save a wish list that other people could see...

I loved the look on my MIL's face when DD1 was christened at 10 months wearing a bright yellow HumphreysCorner dress. Luckily her 2 were christened at 6 weeks ish so the 'lovely' gown was never going to fit-phewee!

When DD1 was born she dug out some of my SIL's dresses from 30+ years ago so being hormonal I took them, sobbed for days until DH gave her them back. She only bought a couple of choice outfits following that incident and didn't bother anymore-hoping she won't bother with DD2 either.

You can always accept them then keep them at the back of the wardrobe until too small then send them to charity-at least you won't have binned them.

xxx

I haven't read all posts, but wanted to say that I too am terribly ungrateful for all inlaws nasties. I have found it only encourages more hideous giftage if said horrors are seen to be worn. A far more sensible apprroach imo is to get them down to the charity shop asap!

Wartywarthog - thankfully my MIL doesn't knit, although unfortunately for my DD, I do!!!!

erm....I opened an amazon account under my DD's name and from there, a wish list. You can then email the wish list to all and sundry with a message!

Hipp are running a campaign at the moment called blankets for babies- they are after unwanted baby bankets, clothes (although not sleepsuits) and terry nappies to send to children in Asia and Africa.

There is info on their website, don't know how to link to it though I'm afraid.

Certainly saves just shoving piles of stuff into the loft as I'm doing currently!

ooooh - do they accept nylon do you think??