Using food as a tool to win me back

[user1475512791]

Might seem a strange heading.
i left my husband after what Women's Aid described as one of the most abusive relationships you could be involved in.
I've had the police remove me from the property because of concerns for my safety. My teenage son refusing to come into the house through fear, my personal property driven over in the road for all to see & 100's of suicide threats from him.
I finally moved into my own house a few weeks ago. I am pretty self sufficient in term of earnings but things have been tight.
TSBXH informed me he had a large pay day yesterday - I have £4 in my purse - and if we needed to eat (me and son) we would have to go up to his house - he would cook & fed us and we could leave.
On breadline & no where to turn

Glad you have a friend who can help. Please get in touch with one of the agencies listed up thread. I think the Citizens Advice Beauro can give you a voucher for a food bank, look into it.

OP is there anything we can do to help you get into a better position long term? Have you had a benefits check (CAB can help you with this if not) to make sure you're getting everything you should be? Are you working and if so can we help you figure out how you might be able to earn more? Do you struggle to budget (I do!) or is there just not enough coming in? Forgive all the questions (which obviously you're under no obligation to answer) but if you could get yourself into a position where you didn't have to struggle so much he would lose his last little bit of power over you and I doubt I'm the only one who would love to help you get there

Whatever means your ex had of informing you he is minted, block that means!

I can make you a nice food basket OP and deliver it on Tuesday, if that helps.

Check you are receiving all you are entitled to. Also are CMS aware he is having a large payday? Make sure you get them to reassess his maintenance. Take every penny you are entitled to.

I'm on day 17 of leaving my abusive ex. I have a ds of 17. Just about to move into our new home on Tuesday.
I went to the Sally Army to get furniture as I left with only my clothes.
The Sally Army will give you vouchers for food.
If you get low again maybe a local branch could help you.
I wish you all the best because you have been so strong in leaving , you have tasted freedom

You may already have seen this but they are really nice. Mums net had a chick pea and sweet corn burger recipe too which are also nice - the kids have eaten them cold the next day on a picnic so you could cook them all at once. You could cook basics rice to go with them or maybe a cheap bread loaf or potatoes.

Monroe’s Carrot, Cumin and Kidney Bean Burger The ingredients are:

1 x 400g tin of kidney beans.
1 onion, peeled and finely chopped.
1 carrot, grated.
1 teaspoon ground cumin.
A handful of fresh coriander, finely chopped.
A splash of oil, plus 2 tablespoons to fry the burgers.
1 heaped teaspoon flour, plus another to shape the burgers.
According to Monroe this makes four generous burgers, but she makes a triple batch at once and freezes the spare burgers.

Good luck op. I hope you didn't mind me posting a recipe suggestion ( they are bloody nice burgers)!

I once saw, on my local Freecycle or Freegle, someone asking simply for a week's food.

I went back to find it and offer and it was already marked as received, if you could do that I am sure someone would give you groceries. I would.

Have you spoken to your bank about a temporary overdraft/extension to your overdraft? If you're mainly self sufficient with your earnings they are likely to help you out and it wouldn't take much to tide you over until Thursday. Mine were very sympathetic when things got tight for me.

What an unbelievable bastard. If he really wanted to help he could arrange a supermarket delivery to your door. Or just give you cash.

I echo what has already been said. You are very brave OP and are doing brilliantly.

Btw in an emergency, your local church will do their best to help - even if you aren't religious.

QueenLizIII the OP does state in her other thread she had just left an abusive marriage, is it really that strange?

Yes if anyone should be cooking for you let it be your boyfriend

I'm on the Oxfordshire/Berkshire border. There are loads of food banks around here. If you just put food bank into google it should bring them all up.

Busted

Rather than shoving them up your orafices maybe you should try cooking the vegetables into a nutritious soup? Only the unused ones though please!

Oops