After a lifetime of shit relationships, one of which brought me two wonderful kids (but was nevertheless still shit) I had completely given up.
Nine years single, and not so much as a sniff of a man in that time, not looking, not interested, shut down and closed in. I honestly, hand on heart, thought I was done, finished.
My posting history on here shows how cynical and resolutely single I was for many years and there was nothing anywhere in my life, on the horizon, not a hint or a clue that was going to change.
I didn't do online dating and I never met anyone in real life. Also, like many of us ... when I was younger I attracted a lot of male attention, but in middle age I had become invisible, or so it seemed, and so for nine years I was celibate, alone and resigned to it. I wasn't looking and no-one was looking at me. I wasn't 'happy' as such, but I was ok, even good, and most of the time, fairly contented.
Reading MN Relationships also helped because I often thought, thank fuck I don't have to put up with all that shite anymore. So along I went, single, cynical and generally ok with my lot.
But guess what?
Here I am now in a joyous relationship with an absolutely lovely man. And yes, much to my surprise they do exist, because I've got one. Never in a million years would I have dreamed this could happen. If you'd have asked me a year ago if this was possible, I'd have laughed at you.
People often spouted the old cliches to me 'you never know what's around the corner' 'you'll meet someone when you are least expecting it' and so on. Nine years on your own and you just think it's bollocks.
I'm not besotted, I'm not swept away, I'm not deluded either. I'm a cynical old cow who has been a long time single .. but I know a good bloke when I've got one because I've had so many arseholes.
If it can happen to me it can happen to any of you.