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Original poster

Think i am beingcheated on

65 replies

petshopboy · 28/06/2016 22:07

This evening driving back from the seaside in my bf car a weird thing happened he has a i phone and must have had it connrcted to the bluetooth on his car anyway a name flashed up on his car bluetooth dashboard it said dawns i phone
He doesnt know a dawn neither would he have it on his phone unless hes cheating i pretended i never saw but inside i was shocked ive not mentioned anything but ive got a feeling hes cheating i cant get into his phone im a technophobe and hes properly got her name filed under some app were going through a really bad time and i was thinking of asking him to leave anyway so wouldnt be surprised if he was cheating what to do now if i ask he will deny it

OP posts:
SpaceUnicorn · 28/06/2016 22:43

Judging by your other threads, he's a nasty bully and you've wanted to end it for a while. Is that right? If so, another woman sounds like the ideal opportunity to get out of this relationship.

PatriciaHolm · 28/06/2016 22:45

So 2 months ago you looked through all his numbers, clocked there was no Dawn, and now 2 months later think he's cheating because you think there is one?

Realistically, this is deeply unhealthy relationship for you, regardless of anything else.

Original poster
petshopboy · 28/06/2016 22:45

Yes i have its not been good for a very long time

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 28/06/2016 22:46

Well, no need to worry then. Dump and move on.

PacificDogwod · 28/06/2016 22:48

There you go then.
You know what you need to do to make your life better.
Good luck Thanks

Wasafatmum42 · 28/06/2016 22:51

sometimes you just have to go with your gut instinct , I would ask him

Joysmum · 28/06/2016 22:58

When I tried to pair up with Bluetooth, it bought up options for the previous owners/drivers which I've still not deleted.

Alternatively it may have been a nearby car.

If you aren't happy without this, think about if it's the right relationship for you.

Original poster
petshopboy · 28/06/2016 22:59

I can but he will deny it
Its bugging me
Its not good
Maybe could be a random connection
Dont knowHmm

OP posts:
SandyY2K · 28/06/2016 23:08

Usually when that comes up on the Bluetooth, it means the person uses the vehicle and has their phone paired to it. I doubt he'd so that if he was having an affair.

It could be the previous owner.

My car had a woman's name, but when DH connected my Bluetooth, he deleted it. If I sold my car it would have my name and the phone brand .. galaxy, unless the new owner deletes it.

If you suspect an affair, there are other ways to investigate.

PM me if you are interested.

Chinks123 · 28/06/2016 23:08

I don't really fully understand the whole Bluetooth connection thing either, I don't use blue tooth or have a car so no idea on that front Confused But I think my first reaction would be "who's dawn?"..It doesn't need to be an accusation, in a relationship you need to feel you can ask your partner anything. Have you spoken to him about him texting other women?

PamDooveOrangeJoof · 28/06/2016 23:22

Was dawn ringing his phone you mean when you were in the car? And is phone was paired t Bluetooth so her name came up in the screen?
He just let it ring and didn't answer it and you didn't mention it?

PamDooveOrangeJoof · 28/06/2016 23:24

I also think you are getting a hard time here. If. A woman was calling my husbands phone who i had never heard of, I'd think it was a bit odd.
I'm sure he would feel the same vice versa.
Anyone close enough to speak to on the phone would warrant a mention in this house.

MyKingdomForBrie · 28/06/2016 23:30

My car does this - it doesn't forget the previous owners (or showroom sales people's) phones. You have to link the Bluetooth by pairing and once paired they don't forget. As he didn't even react if be 99% certain that is what happened here.

Original poster
petshopboy · 29/06/2016 00:48

Its never happened before
Ive been looking online im pretty sure youhave to connect the bluetooth to someones phone ie pair but im sure he would have deleted previuos owners etc has had the car for 4 yrs its confusing
It just said dawns i phone like he must have been talkjng to her and forgot to turn off bluetooth unless she was trying to ring i didn't hear a ringtone

OP posts:
Redglitter · 29/06/2016 00:53

Surely the most simple and straightforward thing would have been to say at the time 'what's that? Dawns iPhone. Whys that appeared'

I can't believe the number of times people on here tie themselves in knots instead of just asking a simple question

Original poster
petshopboy · 29/06/2016 00:58

I had a family member in the car so i didnt mention it as it would have been embrassing
Im not surr he saw the name flash up as it was gone in 3 seconds
He acted normally but then he had to i suppose

OP posts:
DonnaMurray1 · 29/06/2016 04:56

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

AyeAmarok · 29/06/2016 06:42

That's nice, Dear.

Glad you got your wonderful man back.

SandyY2K · 29/06/2016 08:46

Did the name flash up when he turned the ignition on? Or just randomly
Or was he making a call?

Perhaps you can borrow his car and check the recently dialled numbers or see if Dawn is listed.

hellsbellsmelons · 29/06/2016 08:53

If things haven't been good for a while and you don't trust him... why are you with him?
You don't have to have a reason like cheating to end a relationship.
The fact you don't want to be in it anymore is reason enough.
So just dump him.
Job done.

DeathStare · 29/06/2016 09:13

Who knows whether he's cheating or not. This certainly isn't incriminating.

But does it matter? You are clearly unhappy and insecure in this relationship so leave. You don't need a "big reason" (like cheating) to end a relationship. The fact that you're not happy and it isn't working, is enough of a reason in itself

Original poster
petshopboy · 29/06/2016 10:06

Ayesmorak no need to be sarcastic i dont understand your comment .
No it just came on randomly
Asked him this morning said didnt no anyone by that name and said i was imaging it said he deleted all previusly owners on his Bluetooth car

OP posts:
SpaceUnicorn · 29/06/2016 10:34

The name thing is irrelevant, really. You've posted lots of times about his unpleasant he is, how unhappy you are, and how you want to end the relationship. So whether Dawn exists or not, you know that you don't want to be in this relationship and that it isn't making you happy.

None of us can change your relationship or your life for you. You need to be the one to make the change.

Good luck Flowers

techmonkey · 29/06/2016 10:51

To the OP...
I am a tech expert, I write code and I'm working on a fps game... No matter, just credentials!
Bluetooth is a short ranged WiFi system for mobile devices.
If a phone is connected via its own, or the cars, Bluetooth and a passing car also has a phone connected via Bluetooth then as the cars pass briefly they will do what we in the tech world call a "handshake". This is where the phones introduce each others names and settings to each other.
So what you described happens thousands of times a day.
You may have leapt to assuming this is another woman, but it isn't.
Not saying he isn't cheating... I AM saying this isn't evidence.

On the general subject of your relationship. If you are so fast to assume he is cheating is there something you are worried about? Did you cheat, or seriously consider it?
Because as you say you have no info he is, it strikes me.as odd that you are so sure he is cheating... And my experience its the one doing the accusing who has something to hide...

Original poster
petshopboy · 29/06/2016 10:54

Hi no i dont have anything to hide
Just thought it was odd that a random name poppedup on his bluetooth
So what you are saying is a random name can pop on anyones dashboard bluetooth even though its not been paired ??

OP posts:
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