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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

AIBU to want this police officer disciplined? *Updated!*

75 replies

ahundredacre · 25/05/2016 19:01

I was raped in the summer of 2014, by a man I met on internet dating after my husband left me. The rape was terrifying and traumatic. Initially, I tried to be strong and pretend I was fine and that it didn't matter. But it did matter, and I reported it to the police 10 months later.

From what I can work out, the specialist police officers who dealt with my case simply didn't believe me, or, couldn't be bothered to do the work involved in the investigation. I'm pretty certain they just didn't believe me. They didn't do the work properly on my case, and I'm devastated and so let down.

I've followed the official police complaints process, and the rape is being reinvestigated - far more successfully this time, by a different team of officers, although I know it may be too late now. The other side though, is that the original police officers are just being given 'words of advice', rather than being looked at for misconduct/disciplinary action.

The main things that went wrong are that I told them that the man confessed and apologised by text message shortly after the rape, and they said they would search for his phone to look for the messages, but they never did. Instead they just phoned him, and arranged to interview him voluntarily at an appointment the following week - giving him plenty of time to destroy any evidence. He might not have still had the phone/messages anyway, but you never know until you look.

Then, they didn't take statements from all the witnesses that I had named, which the investigation into my complaint and the reinvestigation has discovered would have brought lots more relevant information into the picture. They took two statements, but they were not the correct/appropriate statements, and failed to take the statements that were relevant to the investigation. Apparently the officer concerned 'missed an email' which led to that happening, as the email contained the full list of witnesses that should have had statements taken from them. I feel like that is a pretty poor excuse?

And finally, the officer in charge of my case was terrible at contacting me, she would constantly say she would call me and then not do it, left me an answer phone message that cut out half way through but didn't call back, not respond to my requests to speak to her or be updated, that sort of thing. She was really dismissive on the phone, and had a sort of casual attitude as if she was talking about the weather, and I found it really hard to tolerate. She didn't empathise with me, or seem to care about what I said or felt.

All of those things have been identified and accepted as 'failings'. The investigation into the complaint says that they should have arrested him, they should have searched for the phone, they should have taken all the statements properly, the communication should have been better, and the officer should have been better supervised. But, as a result of the failings, a rapist will still be out there to potentially rape another woman, but the police officer in question has not only not been disciplined, but has been promoted. They've excused the failings as being a result of a high workload and the officer being inexperienced. (Yes, inexperienced - yet being promoted to a position where she will supervise other officers? Does this sound strange to anyone else?) If she had done the investigation properly, they might have got a confession in text messages, lots of evidence from other witnesses, and taken it to court. Instead, they made me feel worthless and like what happened to me is unimportant and not worth investigating.

I'm trying to appeal the decision not to pass my complaint onto misconduct proceedings. I'm trying to write the appeal letter now, but I'm so exhausted I can hardly string the words together and feel like I'm fighting a losing battle, like the police are accountable to nobody, so what is the point. Am I being unreasonable? Was this really a genuine error that shouldn't be looked at any more? Should I just let this drop now?

OP posts:
ItsyBitsyBikini · 25/05/2016 20:00

No you are not being unreasonable at all. I had to do this 3 years ago, I can't go into details as I will out myself but I complained about an officer who stormed into my house at 6am and practically watched me get dressed (he was male), he got nothing, my 'distress and upset' were unfounded and the report dismissed. He worked in the internal investigations dept so I knew it would be dropped anyway but he has now been promoted and I know he is still incompetent at his job.

Keep going with the complaint, if they see you as a nuisance its because they know you're right! If necessary get the IPCC involved and make sure anything you say to them is in writing and you keep a copy of it.

I'm so sorry you had to go through this horrific ordeal and then on top of that deal with crap policing Flowers for you

Unicorntrainer · 25/05/2016 20:05

I am so sorry for what has happened to you. I have absolutely no experience to offer you helpful advice but couldn't read and run. You are angry and justifiably so, but anger is incredibly draining and tiring. Take any help you can get, it is not deceptive to allow a family member to help you write your letter.

My family did have one occasion to make a complaint about a police officer and got nowhere, but when you are angry you want someone to pay for their mistakes. I do hope you get justice lovely, and that time allows you to heal enough to be able to move on from this hideous episode in your life x

ThatStewie · 25/05/2016 20:13

If you would like to take the complaint further, your local rape crisis may have a specific procedure to do so (outside your ISVA). If not, the organisation Rights for Women may be able to help you. Flowers

Skittlesss · 25/05/2016 20:24

Ahundredacre, that's terrible. I feel mad for you. I work on these cases and some of mine have been reinvestigations and it makes me so angry for the victim that it wasn't done right first time.

Keep pushing. You deserve justice and closure. You have to do what needs to be done.

MilesHuntsWig · 25/05/2016 20:43

How horrific for you. You're certainly not unreasonable. I would absolutely want to pursue it. I hope you're successful and get some form of closure/peace from this.

goddessofsmallthings · 25/05/2016 21:02

Well done on the progress you have made with your complaint to date, OP, and it's not surprising that you are feeling exhausted after being continually stonewalled.

However, as it is my understanding that the mandatory referral criteria requires complaints and conduct matters involving a serious sexual offence to be referred to the IPCC, I would suggest that before you proceed further you ask the relevant police authority whether your complaint has been referred and if not, why not?

As Legal is a slow moving board, I would also suggest you ask mumsnet to move this thread to Relationships where I have no doubt you'll receive the support you need to sustain you in what can be a David and Goliath battle of Kafka-esque proportions.

ahundredacre · 25/05/2016 21:36

goddess - I initially thought that too, but on further reading apparently it is only if the conduct is a sexual offence, not the case it relates to:

The appropriate authority must refer complaints and recordable conduct matters that include allegations of conduct which constitutes:
• seriousassault
• serioussexualoffence
• seriouscorruption

Etc.

skittles- thank you for responding - it means a great deal to me to hear that. I wish someone like you had dealt with my case originally.

I will try to work out how to report this to get it moved!

OP posts:
AristotlesTrousers · 27/05/2016 07:55

How's it going, OP?

coco1810 · 27/05/2016 19:14

Op so sorry to hear what a distressing and traumatic experience you have survived. Have no advice but did think would it be an idea to see if any local solicitors would assist you with your letter for free? There is a term for it, but can't think what it is.

Lilacpink40 · 27/05/2016 19:25

Are you doubting yourself as abuse can make the person who was abused feel guilt and shame. On here everyone is telling you not to feel that way, but the inspector could be triggering these feelings?
Imagine this happened to your friend, would it be ok for her to complain and seek justice? (I'd say yes!!) Flowers

HuskyLover1 · 27/05/2016 20:03

There were witnesses to the rape???

SandyY2K · 27/05/2016 20:24

Having worked with a couple of police forces, I'm quite familiar with the complaints procedure.

I think you should take it further. If the Inspector is making you feel like you should drop it, then construct your complaint and send it to the Chief Superintendent.

I would also state that you are unhappy with the way in which the Inspector is trying to get you to drop it. When he should openly tell you about the complaints procedure if you're unhappy.

Believe me it will be looked at and you should state clearly what you want from the complaint.

Like a full investigation into the original one

A written apology for the way the original investigation was handled

A lawyer can advise on compensation for the additional stress you suffered as a result of an incompetent investigation.

ahundredacre · 28/05/2016 14:50

Husky - no, not to the rape, but statements are typically taken from the person/people you first tell afterwards, and their statements are given some considerable importance, and they are called witnesses even though they didn't witness the event itself.

I have just sat down now and written the next letter. I think before, I was trying to write it 'properly' or analytically to justify my opinion, instead of just writing it from my heart to really express myself. Once I let myself take it on as an emotional exercise, it was much easier because I am absolutely furious, seething with rage, at the police. So I wrote down exactly why, and it actually came out quite well, and after re-reading it and editing, I realised I automatically did explain each point quite well. So this one will be off to the Professional Standards Department on Tuesday.

I realised as I wrote it, that one of my biggest complaints is that the officer who was in charge of my case just didn't believe me. And because she didn't believe me, she didn't investigate properly, and because she didn't investigate, she didn't find the evidence that was there waiting to be found. So she continued not to believe me and dropped the case. I initially didn't think I could demonstrate that she didn't believe me, because it felt intuitive, but then I reread what she'd said in response to my complaint, and it actually demonstrates it beautifully. She has been criticised for accepting the suspect's account without question, and dismissing mine - and actioning the investigation on this basis. I think that basically says it all.

OP posts:
ahundredacre · 28/05/2016 14:52

By the way, do you think I should get a solicitor even though I've written the next letter now? I wonder if any would assist me for free or low cost?

OP posts:
BurningBridges · 28/05/2016 22:52

Well done hundred that took some guts and presence of mind. you can usually get a fixed fee interview, used to be something like £20 for half an hour, depends on the case, I paid a fixed fee of £150 to have a civil dispute reviewed and an opinion given in a half hour interview - wonder if that sort of thing would be helpful for you - Google?

ManonLescaut · 28/05/2016 23:13

I'm really glad you decided to continue with the complaints process and I believe it's important not just for you but all rape victims.

But I have to be honest, what you describe is fairly common - rape victim not believed, thus police don't bother to investigate properly, because they don't investigate properly, they don't gather the relevant evidence.

It's a it of a postcode lottery and some forces are better than others. But bear in mind that the Sapphire Unit, which is sposed to be the Met's gold standard of rape investigation, has had 7 IPCC investigations in the last few years, and is now considering changing its name. They fucked the John Worboys black cab serial case as they didn't believe the victims, they fucked up the Kirk Reid serial case to name but two.

So go as far as you can, but bear in mind that what you experienced is sadly quit common and you can't change the police mindset singlehandedly.

SandyY2K · 28/05/2016 23:27

I'd say you can send it without a solicitor, then depending on the response you receive you can take it from there.

Like I said,.lay out your complaint clearly. I know your very emotional about it, but try not to make it too long and include irrelevant detail, otherwise it becomes very difficult to follow.

If you find that tricky, then it's okay to give detail, but then bullet point your complaints after that to summarise and bullet point what you'd like to happen.

Have someone check it over for you. My experience is that you're taken more seriously when you come over as well educated in complaint letters. Be sure to make it clear who you are cc'ing in the letter.

Internal police complaints do a thorough job.

ahundredacre · 20/08/2016 13:09

A little update on this.

Thank you so much for all the advice and support you gave me when I posted, I was reaching the point of giving up, and it kept me going.

I wrote to the professional standards, appealing the result of the complaint investigation. They have upheld my appeal!!!!!! I am so happy I have been dancing around my house!

They've said

  • the investigation and outcome were not proportionate to what I have complained about
  • the investigation into my complaint raised more questions that needed answering but did not answer the questions I had posed in my original complaint
  • that I should have been issued with an apology from the force, yet this was 'sadly omitted' from the response to my complaint,
  • that they will reassess whether the officers whose conduct I have complained about should face misconduct proceedings.

They apologised to me on behalf of the police force concerned, and have assigned a chief inspector to reinvestigate my complaint, who will apparently be contacting me shortly.

I put a cracking line into my appeal about the outcome of the complaint, accusing them of offering me 'inadequate excuses that have been concocted retrospectively in order to provide rationales of the decision making processes', and they apparently couldn't paraphrase this so quoted it directly in the appeal response when listing the issues with the complaint investigation, hahaha.

Grin Grin Grin

OP posts:
SandyY2K · 20/08/2016 13:13

l remember you.

That's fantastic news. I hoped some of what I said was helpful to you.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 20/08/2016 13:27

Good for you op. I'm sorry you have been treated so appallingly by so many but your courage is amazing.

Thank you for choosing to fight back. It helps make things better for all of us Flowers

IloveJudgeJudy · 20/08/2016 13:44

Really well done. It's great that your tenacity has been 'rewarded', even though it would have been better if you'd never had to pursue a complaint in the first place, obviously; the police should just have done their job properly.

You're obviously a very strong woman. You shouldn't have had to be, though. I hope the original investigating officer understands the enormity of their original cynical attitude, but my cynical attitude leads me believe that this won't be the case.

HughLauriesStubble · 20/08/2016 18:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DearMrDilkington · 20/08/2016 18:36

Well done for pushing it futher! Think of all the other women(and men) you'll be helping by making sure every rape is investigated properly too! You deserve lots of Wine&Chocolate tonightGrin! So happy for youSmile.

DearMrDilkington · 20/08/2016 18:38

P.s your a much stronger and braver woman than me!Flowers

AristotlesTrousers · 20/08/2016 19:15

Really pleased to hear that, ahundredacre. What a great and encouraging outcome (even though you shouldn't have had to go through it to start with). I don't think I'd have been strong enough to do what you've done. I hope you can begin to move on properly now. Star