just want to rant.

[Ahappynewmummy]

"D"P just got back from work and first thing he did was walk past me and said I'm going to stay upstairs. I understand he does 11 hour days (not all working this also includes traveling) but to come back and not hug me or kiss me hello just I'm going to stay upstairs. then because I didn't tidy upstairs he went great 11 hours of housework you've done here. does he actually think I can do that much housework also look after a teething baby go out and do my things and prepare and start tea. I'm. other being nasty but if my son is crying cause he's in pain with his gums he comes first over housework. also we're going out on Sat (I organised it all) and I do understand its his only day off and he doesn't have to take us but he went who's going to pay for my petrol I said me even though your company is paying for your petrol this week and you'll have some left over, then he went who's paying for me food and I went me then he went good cause I ain't. I'm like you pig. I also mentioned how I like he's spending time with me so his response was nothing stopped you coming to my work for these 11 hours to see me if you're that bothered about spending time with me. thing is I don't drive and it takes 3 hours to get there an public transport.

I don't want to hear LTB cause he's had a bad day at work and brought it home. he's moved jobs for me and our son so that's why I'm paying for our day out as a thank you but he's just pushed some of my buttons with how I feel neglectful today.

I agree with you. I'm just shocked how he acted as he helped me through so much stuff. when we got together I was trying to get out of an eating disorder and he helped me. I was ill. also when I had my son I had a natural birth no help but I had a horrible tear and had to be rushed to theatre as I was loosing too much blood after it all I couldn't walk sir sleep you name it and he done everything for me. it's just shocked

happynewmummy, people are complex and are not always good or bad all the time. I'm sure he does have his good points, and he looked after you when you were sick after your baby was born. You yourself have said that maybe you irritate him occasionally. This is normal, we all rub each other the wrong way from time to time, it doesn't warrant unkindness, refusal to apologize and verbal attacks.

What matters now is how you treat each other day-to-day. If he does this regularly then you do have a problem. I think you have to address the fact that he needs to be able to accept when he's in the wrong and apologize for it.

You need to have a convo, when you're both relaxed, not stressed etc about 'us'. He needs to start apologising when he's wrong or mean, and to do the things he's said he'll do in a timely manner, not after weeks of you waiting and him prevaricating.