I've been with my partner for nearly four years and 9 months ago we had a baby. The problem is my partner is like Jekyll and Hyde and it's got worse in the last 9 months. The relationship started off good, got increasingly crappy a while later where he became overly jealous and hated me going out. Then a year and abit ago it started to improve. At his worse he calls me all names under the sun, he picks on the things he knows will bother me .
He states I'm a bad mother to my children ( 1 from a previous relationship)
He accuses me of neglect of my child.
He's constantly stating I have mental health issues ( which is ironic because I work in mental health)
He slates my lifestyle, my family.
He states i have no friends.
Basically he will use any topic he knows will bother me.
I've been with him four years and he detested my old house which I rented so I set up home in a different area , getting myself on the property ladder alone. I then spent money on all the things he said I needed. I quit smoking , cut down on drinking alcohol and got a better job, all which he had moaned about. He remained living with his mum35 miles away but came down often.
At one point during our relationship things were going alright we talked about having a baby , as a result I came of coil on got pregnant. Throughout the pregnancy he was great but from day one of giving birth he was a nightmare. We planned to give birth near his neck of the woods to be closer to him because of work which meant me spending four weeks living with his mum. straight after giving birth the plan was to drive to my home where he'd be moving in, however straight after giving birth he made me go to his mums for five hour where his mum then cried on the doorstep because his mum was leaving home ( he's 35). We then has to make the journey countless times back to see his family.
I struggled with breastfeeding but he wasn't supportive stating if I couldn't do it I should stop, and later stating I was neglecting the baby by doing so as my milk was low.
He accused me of neglect numerous time.
He'd threaten to baby off me and give him to his mum who was more capable of looking after him.
I cook two main meals from scratch every night at different times because he doesn't like warming food up , I clean and ironed although often got behind . He now sends his clothes to his mums to be ironed because I don't iron them the way he likes. He states I do nothing. I've recently gone back to work full time and changed jobs during maternity leave. He's still screams that his time off is his time and he passes the baby back to me as soon as I give him too him. We now pay his mum to look after the baby 35 miles away it's not what I want because it's 35 miles away but I have no say My partner still works over there and travels 1 hour to get to work every day.
He's constantly sleeping at his mums and recently left me for week with the kids because he had a throat infection. Hardly any of his stuffs here.
He's constantly grumpy I feel uncomfortable around him in my own house and often sit upstairs
If I go out the following day he gets worse ,argues with me ,leaves me to look after the children, throws low blow comments
He's has a 1950s attitude to relationship and it drives me mad.
He works 5-6 days a week , he's a manager and speaks to me like one of his employees.
He'd constantly critiding me and my. Parenting ,he tells me his family don't like me .
In a nutshell i want him gone!
I've told him to go before and he's happily gone but after a few days he just lets himself back in ,sleeps and pretends nothing happened. He never apologises. He worms his way back in through the children by taking them out and playing more with them . He's always been great with my eldest.
I can't take anymore of his constant evil comments and insults and it would be so much easier to live alone .his do I keep him out for good ? Without getting any other people involved and with him still being able to see the kids?
Any advice would've appreciated sorry if this doesn't make sense I'm exhausted