How do I move on from this?
Moving on is vastly over rated as an initial strategy for dealing with the curve balls life (and loves) throw at us.
If somebody fucked you over, prioritised what they wanted despite what it cost you and lied/cheated/deceived .... they are at the very least caperble of being an unthinking, uncaring, selfish wot not when they feel justified in doing so. "Moving on" from that can be a case of putting on blinkers and pretending you don't know what you know about them. Which leaves you vulnerable to more of the same hurt you have already suffered. And spending everyday feeling like your life is based on a big fat lie.
What, if any, attempts were made on your spouse's part in terms of rolling up sleeves and rebuilding your relationship from the ground up ? Or has it been a case of "let's leave sleeping dogs lie and sort of pretend it never happened" ?
The latter can lead to less of a sleeping dog, and more one that is rotting gently in the corner, stinking up what is left of your relationship.
I think in your shoes, something to consider moving on from is the onus you are putting on yourself to ... move on.
Confront the sleeping/rotting dog. To see which it is. Becuase you can't deal with something unless you have a very clear idea of what it is you need to deal with.
Sometimes, if the dog has gone zombie, ripping you apart on the inside to the extent that there are large chunks of how you felt about a person gone forever...you have to concede defeat and put the bugger down for everybody's sake. If that is the case it is no reflection on you as a human. Betrayal can be extremely hard to work through at the best of time, even with the best of shamefaced partners looking to make right as far as they can.
If the dog is just sleeping/in a coma, you might need professional help working through how you feel and how you want to proceed. Becuase from the sounds of things, this is not necessarily the freshest of wounds. And old, jagged scar tissue can be a bugger to scrape away on your own. But if it doesn't get scraped before stitching, the wound will never heal properly.
Be nice to yourself. You haven't failed as a human because you weren't able to spring back into your previous relationship mindset like a well trained whippet in the name of "moving on". You are just being a perfectly reasonable human, who has been badly hurt. Blaming yourself for not being able to will yourself into a forgiving "kiss kiss, all better now" stance, may well be acting like a bucketload of salt on a still weeping wound.