I hve red it. I understnd how you feel, and I understand the guilt you are feeling, because I used to peer into ds1's cot and weep that such a perfect and helpless child had had foisted upon him two such worthless shits as dp and I as parents.
Sometimes I could weep for the world now, and I have had another baby since then.
But just because you feel like a bad mother, doesn't make you one. I am pretty sure you aren't, or you wouldn't be wasting your time telling people how awful you are.
Dp was not ready for a baby, despite him insisting that he was. But, he got ready. He had to, because the baby was right there, and inescapable.
You have both suffered one HELL of a shock - you had a baby. It rocks your world like nothing else. It sounds like you are BOTH suffering PND, and given the amount of stress in your lives, I wouldn't be surprised.
Have you considered relate? I thought it was something only poncy people go to, but my NHS counceller gib=ves dp and I some relationship councelling, and it is fantastic - and this from a woman who - this time last year- was on here raving about how she was going to kill her partner if he spent one more penny.
You will feel like a better parent when you baby girl is older. You don't get a lot back from kids until they hit the so-called terrible twos. but I found it was that age that came spontanious cuddles and shrieks of laughter that make you feel you can't be that bad.
Stick around Mumsnet, because there are people who do feel or have felt very much as you do now, and I know it does pass.
I would suggest going to see your GP, asking for antidepressants, (your dp too!) asking for some councelling, and don't make any major family decisions until your baby is 1, because everything is so much clearer when you aren't in that horrific postnatal haze.