Can't get the truth, please help

[TalesFromTheCity]

Hi all. Could do with your thoughts on this situation...Snooped on DP's phone ( yes, I'm a bastard for doing so) and found email from a woman I did not know, was very 'friendly' in tone, enough to make me feel suspicious. Without referencing this email, I asked if he knew her ( made up some convoluted story- don't want to say too much in case I out myself), he said no emphatically. Next time I checked, email was gone. Yes I'm an idiot as should have at least copied it. DP does not know I saw this email and I'm almost doubting myself, but I did see it. So, why would he strongly deny knowing this woman when he clearly does? Only nefarious reasons spring to mind. And what do I do next? If I say I saw email that admits my snooping, but I know he'd deny it anyway.
Please help

Effic- that's amazing, thank you. I will absolutely do that and won't put up with any deflection.

Nope, no coming back. Good, you sound strong. Good luck and look after yourself.

Take care Tales.

Good luck x

Good luck op. Think I'd still try to get evidence but I can totally understand that calmness would be so difficult to pull off.

Good luck to you OP don't let him bullshit you, hope you're ok.

Just be absolutely persistent - remember he also knows he's lying - so no matter how many times he deflects, denies, flies off the handle or flounces off just state the fact and ask again. Once you've made it clear flat denial isn't even an option, and you won't be giving up asking anytime this millenuim, he's likely to try and come up with a plausible story. He'll need time to do that so you'll probably get more denial and stomping off (thinking time for him) and then well thought out story. He's got to come up with two stories though - one how he knows her and the other why he lied. The 'how he knows her' lie is most likely your angle of attack because remember he doesn't know what you (are mostly pretending) to know. If he mentions emailing each other, demand to see them but say that's not how you knew so what else has been going on? Probably more denial here but keep going.

Btw - re: the email - If he says he's deleted email, tell him to just open the deleted folder, when he can't and it becomes evident it's the only thing he's doubled deleted, that's you next question - why double delete that email?

This is just my opinion! Feel free to ignore. I just know how powerless you can feel when someone lies and this is a way, in my opinion, to take some of the power back x

just in case you have time before you confront (and if you think its useful) - the majority of email clients have a 'recover deleted emails' function....have you tried that? (i.e. even after they've been deleted from the 'deleted item' folder) If it was recent that might work

I don't think asking the "why was it deleted twice" question is worth asking because the answer will be the same as why did you delete it once. So the op didn't get in a huff about it.

Did you confront him, Tales?

Sock it to him Tales, we're with you.