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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Merry effing xmas NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

56 replies

Tyedye · 23/12/2006 10:09

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OP posts:
Carmenere · 23/12/2006 10:11

Well stop drinking now. Your dc's have one selfish parent, they probably need one that is sober at least. Your dp sounds like an idiot. Ignore him as much as possible.

frenchconnection · 23/12/2006 10:12

youre in tears because of pickle??

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 23/12/2006 10:13

Poor tyedye what a pig. Well done on not cutting yourself, I remember that impulse well and it is very strong and destructive.

Carmenere's right though, STOP drinking. It will make you feel worse in the long run.

(((((((((((hug from me))))))))))

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 23/12/2006 10:14

She's not in tears because of pickle, she's in tears because her dp shouted at her and insulted her in front of her kids, again. Can't you read?

pinkchampagne · 23/12/2006 10:16

No great improvements then, Tyedye??
What's been happening? Have you sought any legal advice yet?
It's a bit early to be on the drink!

pinkchampagne · 23/12/2006 10:18

Have a hug from me too. I know how horrible this kind of treatment is.
{{{{{{ }}}}}}

Original poster
Tyedye · 23/12/2006 10:39

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dingdongmerRADLEYonhigh · 23/12/2006 11:56

How are things now?

pinkchampagne · 23/12/2006 13:55

Oh dear.
How are things now, Tyedye?

Original poster
Tyedye · 23/12/2006 14:15

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pinkchampagne · 24/12/2006 10:14

Hope all is calm for you now, Tyedye & that you have a nice Christmas.x

Squiddley · 24/12/2006 10:26

This is the 3rd time I have recommended this book on this site and I only joined a couple of days ago:- "Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft I have talked to quite a few other people who had read this book and it has helped very much. - Amazon £7.09
He has problems with control I would say. I am in a situaltion sim to yours and hes off work until 3rd Jan and I feel sick to be at home with him. Dreading Xmas hols. Please try not to drink you have not cut yourself which you deserve a massive pat on the back for Well Done. If you can resist that you can resist the drink. This will make you much stronger - if what the book says is true thats what he wants this kind of reaction from you. While your heads in a mess from his abuse and your drinking you cannot sort out where you want to be and go for it. Which you can. My hubby is same only physical to. I am in that stage where I want to leave more than anything in the world but scared, this book has helped me and I am hoping that the decisions I have made I will keep up in the new year - just on hold as hes off until new year. I keep telling myself and I know now its true that I can do this. Leave him. Also the book makes it quite clear that this is not your fault. Its his. Please keep your chin up. This site seems really good and the people friendly and supportive. I am going to try and get on over the hols but PC in living rm where he can see. I will try to keep an eye on this thread but if I cannot I will def look first thing when hes back at work.

Pinkchampagne · 24/12/2006 10:31

I have a feeling that Tyedye recently bought that book, squiddley. I am tempted to buy it myself though!
Sorry to hear you are in an abusive relationship too. Do use MN for support - I don't know what I would have done without it!
Hope you have a peaceful Christmas.

vitomum · 24/12/2006 10:32

squiddley and tyedye

Christmas is a time of heightened emotions, please take care and i hope next year brings you the changes you need

divastrop · 24/12/2006 20:47

tyedye and squiddley-just wanted to say im thinking of you,ive been there and at this time of year its so hard,tiptoeing round an abusive man trying to keep the peace for the sake of the lo's and feeling like you're going to fall apart at any moment.

i admit to having used drink as a temporary escape from a nightmare situation also before.

this year i will be with my wonderful dp and my 4 children(plus bump who wont let me drink),having a quiet(well,ykwim)time without having to worry about upsetting anybody etc.it is possible to escape the abuse,there are many mn'ers who have been there and got out,like me.there is hope for you.stay strong,and hopefully next christmas will be quiet and peaceful and happy for you x

Original poster
Tyedye · 24/12/2006 23:31

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Pinkchampagne · 24/12/2006 23:33

How's things, tyedye?

QuootiepieTheChristmasAss · 24/12/2006 23:53

Hiya ~ my eyes are abit fuzzy and tired to read past the OP, but im around tonight if you're needing to chat xXx

Pinkchampagne · 25/12/2006 08:59

Hope all's ok, Tyedye.

glitterfairyonachristmastree · 25/12/2006 09:20

Tyedye am sending loads and loads of love and hugs and thinking of you. SOunds awful.

divastrop · 25/12/2006 19:30

hope today has been ok for you tyedye x

Original poster
Tyedye · 28/12/2006 13:22

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Original poster
Tyedye · 31/12/2006 08:35

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Original poster
Tyedye · 31/12/2006 19:35

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Dior · 31/12/2006 19:36

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