Anyone left marriage after affair only to be 'dumped' by OM

[allymcbeal1]

I had an affair with a divorced man who said he wanted me to be free before seeing me again (early November). I fell in love and believed him when he said he felt the same. The affair made me realise my marriage was over. I duly stated divorce proceedings and taking him at his word and now after letting him know this (that I am now separated) he has gone completely silent and won't return my text/call. This was a month ago. Anyone been in this situation? I feel so stupid but do know divorce is the right thing for a range of other reasons I won't go into.

Thanks all
Feeling a bit better now - maybe time heals after all.
It was OMs birthday today and glad have stuck to my plan of never contacting him again ever!!! Feeling I had a lucky escape and deserve so much better X

Indeed you do.
Onward and upwards.
Glad you are feeling better.

I know someone who was long term OW and where her boyfriend/boss left his W, she assumed for her, she was devastated to find she too had been dumped as OW and he had gone of with a 3rd not so "lucky lady".

What a treasure!

OP you deserve much better.

Good luck Ally, well done and you're doing really well x

You DEFINITELY deserve better. Well done for ignoring his birthday.

Thanks squiggle. I do have some bad moments still but less than before. I stupidly haven't deleted him from facebook and he put a picture up of him when he had long hair (he said he would grow it again for me - how silly!) and I went a bit wobbly but must delete him now. Have broken off all other contact.

An update everyone. Sometimes things work out! I am now divorced and slowly dating OM who was true to his word and waited for me to be free. We are taking things slowly and I have never been so happy. When you know you have found the one you just know.

It was OMs birthday today and glad have stuck to my plan of never contacting him again ever!!! Feeling I had a lucky escape and deserve so much better

What happened to never contacting him again and deserving better? What changed, what's his explainatiins for going cold on you?

That was a very quick divorce!

This thread is bollocks.

Glad things worked out for op but for anyone who it didn't;

I am going to get mums net nuts awards for this but to simplify it all for everyone;

It's all about mammal mating - some male humans ( like some dogs) have a strong chase instinct - it is there to fend off rival males and make more fertile females available to them and I think we know what happens after that - procreation.

Sadly like many dogs when they have got the rabbit they are not sure what do with it or once all that adrenaline has gone there onto the next chase ( sorry men for comparing you to dogs but it was the best way to describe the chase instinct

To put it in a more comical way, you love your greyhound dearly but would you ever trust it with the neighbours pet rabbit?

Avoid chase instinct men ( usually driven by high levels of testosterone.

I must say OP that things seem to have moved incredibly fast. Did you start the EA with him early Nov, or was that when you split?

And then you were getting over him late Jan but by 2 March you've "never been happier".

Be careful, you are vulnerable from your previous relationship.