how to handle husband

[pissedonatrain]

DH and I have been married 10 years. We separated in August but are still living in the same house.

He tells me he wants to move out and be single but still be married. I found it really insulting him commenting about how he didn't really appreciate being single when he was.

So I said does that mean I can move on and date and he told me no, as we're still married.

So it seems to me he wants to move out and do what he wants as a single man, but I'm not allowed to do anything.

In Australia, you have to wait a year.

He would trash the house by it being a filthy pig stye. Let the dog poo in the house, dirty dishes and old food laying around, let the grass grow a metre high, etc.

I'm trying soooo very hard to ignore him but today I want to punch his face!!

Talk to us, OP. Testify!

ok I think my mistake is talking to him at all. I am trying to be polite but he is just vile.

It's like whatever he wants to talk about or say, I'm supposed to listen but if I say anything he is dismissive and says I am bothering him and turns back to his computer.

I'm going to turn the lock around on my door so he doesn't just keep barging into my room without knocking.

It doesn't matter of you are "supposed" to listen. Don't. Be rude.

Be rude. Agreed.

More to the point, be "Meh". Shrug, like he just don't matter. Take yourself off for a drive.

Have you changed the WiFi password yet?

Him - "Your shirt is too tight!"

You - "I don't care what you think - your opinion means nothing to me!"

Just don't bother with him at all, if there is noise coming out of his mouth, leave the room halfway through his sentence, you aren't together, you're nothing to each other. If you feel like being polite, sneer at him or say 'mmmmm great.' To whatever drivel he's coming out with, even better if your reply makes it apparent that you're not listening.

Of course your room needs a lock, as does all of your food and cleaning items and everything else, you're seperated, he doesn't get your food or appliances or anything else.

If you want him to leave you have to make him as uncomfortable as possible. Ideally, act as if he weren't there.

No WiFi. No food. No lifts. No chat. No using your toaster. Play loud music when he's doing stuff. Put headphones on when he tries to talk to you. I'd limit my responses to "Are you still living here cocklodger?"

He likes slobbing around and getting a rise out of you. Don't give him the pleasure.

Do you have RL friends who could make suggestions? It could be lots of fun. Perhaps they should come round to visit. A lot.

Considering how you started this thread, what about pretending you are going on dates? Get all dressed up nice, go out, meet a friend or go to the movies, come back late, give no explanation whatsoever beyond, "Yes I am going out. " Show him you spit on his petty dictats.

I'd definitely speak to a solicitor so that you make sure you do whatever you need to do to show you've been separated these three months already... especially if you're still living together.

OMG at noise coming out of his mouth!! I can't stop laughing!!!

My friend thought I should just pretend he's an artificial plant. No need to speak to or respond to a potted plant as that would be a bit odd.

I do need to stop being polite.

I do think I'm going to do the fake date thing.