Would this be a deal breaker for you?

[Dealbreaker101]

I've been with my current partner for 4 years. When we met he took drugs, drank and smoked a lot. I knew this about him but it didn't bother me much. He has a very successful career and in his words 'works and plays' hard.

The relationship has been and is relatively fine. He recently proposed and I said yes. However I recently had a conversation with him in which I told him that if we are going to get married and have a family then he needs to change his lifestyle. I can't imagine leaving a child in the care of someone on cocaine whilst holding a beer.

In his opinion, which is true, I met him when he was as he has always been. I agree that his lifestyle has never been a problem for me this far and he's always been a caring a respective partner. He thinks the next step is to get married and have children. He thinks that he obviously won't be doing drugs and drinking in front of the children but I want him to stop entirely.

Would this be a deal breaker for you, all else being fine?

If you do go through with this you are not only a fool but knowingly risking your future childrens' safety. I cannot fathom why anyone would think twice in your position.

You don't need an excuse or to be kind. "I'm dumping you because you are prioritising your drug addiction over a fulfilling family life" gets straight to the nub of the matter. He is the one with an illegal, dangerous habit. Not you

My BFF thought the same thing when she became pregnant unexpectedly (was told it was impossible, but heigh ho). She thought her 'd'H would give up snorting speed and drinking. He didn't.

Please, I beg you, don't expect this man to change unless he tells you HE wants to for himself. Not for you, not for his child. Himself.

As far as years wasted, if you marry him and it all goes to shit, how many more years will you have wasted?

Say what pocketsaviour said.