He disappeared on Tuesday. Seems my life has been a lie.

[Breezy1985]

I hope no one minds me posting here but I really can't bring myself to tell anyone in real life, I feel so ashamed and humiliated
He Everything seemed so perfect, he moved in 6 months ago, yet on Tuesday he went out asked me to meet him a few hours later and never showed up, he rang me an hour after he left to make sure I was still meeting him and he told me he loved me, I haven't heard anything since.
I've since found out that literally everything he ever said to me was a lie, even down to where he worked and showing me fake wage slips.

I found out where he really works, but he left his job on Tuesday and hasn't been back, he told them the same morning.

He has left everything he owns and his work keys, I've been to every address I had for him yesterday, and just kept finding out more lies, I'm far from the first woman he's done this too.

Yet I just want answers and I know I'll never get them, if I do it'll all be a lie. I miss him so much and I hate myself for that, I haven't eaten since, everytime I fall asleep I wake up with him on my mind.
It's so difficult not knowing anything or if he's even safe. I feel so stupid that I didn't find out sooner and for the fact I can't stop thinking about him.

It's my 30th birthday on Monday and we was meant to be going on holiday with my dc, I'm still going to take them but I'm dreading it.
Will I ever stop asking why?
Sorry for the long post but I just needed to get it out

Then you need to ring the police right away and report him missing at the very least. They have the resources to chase things up and all the right computer connections.

The police can look for him, you don't need to be involved with that other than starting the enquiry.

My exhusband was a bit of a financial disaster. Through this I found out that you can write to Experian (credit ref agency) and ask them to disassociate you from someone. They are then obliged to share this info with the other agencies. If you give them all his details and state you have no association at least he won't be able to use your address and credit reputation to do anything new.

yep I agree - report him missing, so if there are any repercussions down the line, such as debt or fraud, then you have covered your own back.

As several days have passed without you or anyone else that you know of having heard from him, please report him missing to the police if for no other reason than having nothing to reproach yourself in the unlikely event that he does, or has done, something foolish.

The police can come to your home tonight or tomorrow morning and there'll be nothing more to it than giving them a physical description and brief details of the last time you saw him.

Sounds like my late father. He had several wives/women on the go for years. He also ripped them off and would disappear. They all turned out for his funeral probably to make sure he was dead, but that's another story....

Sorry to hear of your circumstances. Sadly he's probably already found his next victim and I'm not sure you can trust the friend not to know more than he is letting on. If you can give police information about his life with you and previous gfs they may be able to track him. If the job and payslips were fake and he has apparently left with no id, he could be adopting other identities. Check he hasn't taken any paperwork associated with your dc for example.

You have to be careful not to start thinking to yourself 'I'm the only one that he.......' etc etc etc. (I'm getting little vibes from your posts that you think you might be extra special to him in some way.) If you've got away without too much damage then you'll have been lucky - but that will be all it is. Luck. And, frankly, you may not even know that for some time.

Have you managed yet to start delving etc on accounts, credit reports and so on?

I hope you are feeling a bit better today OP. I know you will still be in shock about finding out all the lies.

You need to have a busy day tomorrow packing for the birthday holiday on Monday,