Hello...
Well I have posted on here a few times as been single a good year and a half now and your help has been amazing thank you......However in the last few months I have "finally" met a really sweet guy, who I feel is on the same wavelength with me.
As I had such a horrendous last relationship with a controlling partner, I felt I wanted to meet someone the opposite which has been the case here. Im 40, he is 48 and he just had his divorce through in February of this year after 12 years marriage with a really awful, controlling ex partner who reaped him financially where he's having to borrow money to pay her off still. He doesnt want to tell me everything about her but I think he went through quite a heavy depressive time, only for his family to not speak to him for 2 years, dad and brother which sounds incredibly horrific for anyone to disown anyone like that because of an ex partner. All is ok now since they divorced.
She does still come up in conversation i.e. don't have a ring tone the same as hers as it brings up bad memories of her, all I fear is a text coming in thats negative as its normally from her with those nasty words texting me in the past, she was that nasty, she was on anti depressants etc etc....so I think I have a good picture of what she is like.
After a while, getting to know one another, we end up sleeping together as the chemistry is amazing between us and we are so in sync with one another being open etc, however (and this is rather awkward for me to write this) me thinking, the chemistry is strong which it is, when we get down to it, he wants to please, he says, but 2 hours later (after feeling somewhat sore and knackered like another gym session and drained) he still hasnt come. I feel pretty urgh?? so much built up passion...He says he likes to be in control but I kind of like just going with the flow and seeing what happens and if one person is first, hey who cares, we can go again. My last long term relationships where they were amazing physically, were exactly that, hence why it was so many years we were together etc.
I didnt want to stay over at his either, which isn't like me. Instead I am home feeling a tad deflated or perhaps disappointed and knackered incase we had t go through a marathon again the next morning..... my expectations may have been too high or assuming it would be something else and it not been.
2 hours...literally.....he didnt go soft, so perhaps a good thing but after 2 hours we had to have a break (food lol) then he was turned on again, but he couldn't get hard so, at 2am...Im thinking, Im losing my energy levels here and need to go home before i pass out. So I did and asked him to finish off himself (oops) I know I know, that sounds terrible but i was trying to think not another 2 hours .....and wanted him to feel more relaxed at ease. I have mentioned to him I feel he is uptight which he admits he is and he said he will trust or finds trust an issue, his ex ended up being unfaithful.
He's quite happy with me by the looks of things but Im hoping this isn't an issue, as for me this area is such a big thing xx - any ideas or anyone had the same. Looks like all he wants is to please me which is lovely and isn't selfish but 2 hours....I cant even do 45minutes in the gym - ouch!! - I'm aching this morning...I feel old....oh boy!!
I havent mentioned this to him as I don't want to do or say anything that may hurt him again so will find the time when its right if this happens again, definitely feel its a trust, nervous thing
xx thank you xx