Anybody else unhappily single and fancy a little group moan?

[SurlyCue]

I am. Single 5 years with brief 4 month relationship ending a couple of months ago. Would just like to meet someone i can rub along nicely with. Tried OLD a few years ago but too many wrong'uns to wade through to find the decent ones.

Anyone else feel like wallowing?

I'll shut up in a minute. I hate being single. W A L L O W.....

I found OLD quite scary really. Lots of quite angry men out there and some were very good at hiding it. Others not so much

Me too 44 2 kids, separated for one year, don't feel like OLD, in a bit or a rut, feeling lonely, eating, work and kids, need a kick up the butt, just cant seem to shake it off at the moment, am really missing an old friend who passed away just wish I could talk to him again, hugs to everyone x

onion so sorry for your loss.

Thanks Surly, it was a long time ago now, sometimes I think he was my soulmate and I won't find anyone else x

Just noticed this thread and would like to jump on too.

Have been single three years. I have one dd who is with me most of the time. Terrified of being alone forever which is how I feel it will be when I'm in my feeling sorry for myself mood. Other times I feel glad not to be in the unhealthy relationship I was in, and happy I can do my own thing- but not so easy when you have a dd who likes to spend all her time with mummy (although I'm v glad about thT too!)

So yes, I relate to everything that been posted. ????

Yes i worry about being eternally alone. Its a scary thought tbh. Especially once the dc are up and out of the house.

I have a friend who never dated, never even kissed a boy/man until she was 20. And the first man she dated is the man she married and they are celebrating 10 happy years together now with first baby due any day. I get jealous of how she struck so lucky. ive met and dated lots of men and none have been keepers. Clearly need to get some tips from her!

Hiya I am glad I saw this thread SurlyCue

I was with my XH for 17 years before we split up (met at 16, married at 27, divorced at 38). We have a DD aged 11yrs who lives with me but sees him loads and had loads of contact, he is a good Dad.

3 years after I split with XH, I met XP. We were on/off for 4 years and in May this year I finally managed to walk away as it was a toxic relationship due to his issues. I really thought he was the one though, I was deeply in love with him, more than I ever loved my XH. I hoped he would change and realise I was the one but no. I couldn't cope with the paranoia and accusations anymore. Then blaming it on his "past" which got quite boring eventually. I think he chose to be a victim of his past and refused to move on; I did not want that for my life so I left.

They are the only 2 relationships I have ever had in my life so I have complete anxiety attacks about the thought of meeting someone new, much as I would like to. I don't mind being single, enjoy own company but it would be nice to have companionship. Obviously I have met men, had some sneaky snogs etc but nothing further in between my XH and XP.

At the moment, I feel I have no social life. All my friends are married and/or expecting babies, none are single. They tell me to "get out there" but it isn't that easy to magic a social life out of nowhere is it? So I can't see how I would meet someone with not much of a social life

I dabbled with internet dating but found it horrendous, and that all men seemed to want is sex. I'm no prude but people asking to meet without even seeing a profile pic is not my thing. Or getting straight into flirting before you have even sent a polite hello!

So that is me, DD is with her Dad and my weekend so far has been 5 hours on here last night, housework all day today, a trip to Tescos at 9pm for some munchies and now back on here :)

I'm lucky DD goes to her XH every other weekend. Although at the moment, I almost wish she was here for the company.

Sometimes I think I am 41 and what exactly have I done with my life? What am I doing with my life? All I think of is sod all. I know everybody says you get out what you put in, positivity draws people to you but as you all know it is damn hard to feel positive when you don't have much to be positive about (if that makes any sense)

BegintheBeguine you hit the nail on the head I want somebody I can have an emotional connection to and a hug from, knowing that I'm as important to them as they are to me.

4 cats here (mum, her 2 grown up babies, & surrogate dad currently curled up in a furry heap on the sofa)

Ecstatically single and content to spend Saturday night at home piddling around on mumsnet and catching up with friends/relatives by email/phone.

With or without felines, unless our number's up in some mass disaster we're all destined to die alone and it's remarkable how many dear departed pop their clogs shortly after those gathered round the deathbed have decamped to the loo/the cafe/the pub.

Sorry for your loss onion. I know how you feel but, without wishing to sound totally deranged woo, there's no reason why you shouldn't continue to converse with your friend if it brings you comfort to do so.

Having had one 'love of my life' and two soulmate relationships I don't discount the possibility of there being more, but it's not my intention to actively seek them out as I believe they manifest as and when it's their time to do so.

goddessofsmallthings I really liked this Having had one 'love of my life' and two soulmate relationships I don't discount the possibility of there being more, but it's not my intention to actively seek them out as I believe they manifest as and when it's their time to do so

I am trying to think that way ... that a lovely man will cross my path at some point when I least expect however I am just feeling a little bit impatient at the moment and wish he would hurry up :)

I'm joining you. If that's ok.

I'm half happy. I dumped someone a few weeks ago and I dumped the guy I was seeing before that.

I'm 40. More attractive than I was at 20. A 'curves in all the right places' size 12-14. But no longer 25, a size 10 or conventionally pretty, which is what my experience is showing me all 40something men really want. And will continue to look for whilst, slightly embarrassedly, settling for me.

Shame really, I'm much more interesting now than I was at 25!

I'd love to meet someone I could trust, who is intelligent, a bit bohemian, loyal, faithful and who would cherish me. But I don't think such a man exists.

I have tried, and continue to try, OLD. Generally, the men of my age (49) don't want relationships, they want sex. Most seem to want to punish whoever they meet for whatever happened in their previous relationships

Yy to lots of angry men.

Despite being married for 20+ years I've never really had a successful relationship .

(I am now divorced, thought I should mention )

Bit late to the party... Been single 7 years. Was doing casual relationships up until last year when I decided I wanted something more serious. OD is the most soul destroying experience, I have met some very attractive, interesting and successful men but they just want sex. I have no idea how to get a boyfriend. I don't want to get married or live with anyone. sigh

Oh, actually I was refused a date this week because the guy wanted children (his own "not anyone else's"). So yeah, they either want sex, or breeding potential.

I think the problem with OLD is that men of a certain age have had the big relationship, found it a bit shit and now want to treat themselves to a new model every few months! It is a kid In sweetshop type environment. For everyone who gets lucky on OLD, there are many that don't!

Good morning! Can I join! I'm single too and the thought of another day without any adult company fills me with a sinking feeling. Forecast says rain all day and my plans to go out were cancelled as it was an outdoor event.
I have 2 ds who I have for most of the time unless ex decides he can fit them in and sees them.
Have also tried OLD but as I dont get much free time from the children it is hard to arrange dates!
A lot of the time I am happy single but when I see happy couples holding hands I do get jealous and think why not me?

goddess I would love to believe that but I don't know how someone can manifest themselves in my life. I don't work (recently made redundant,) I am with my dc 100% of the time and no one is going to knock on my door (no pavement or street lights outside my house!)

Mind you I do know someone who met someone at a bus stop in their 60s. So there is hope.

Another half happy here. I've got my own business which is going really well, and I've got my lovely 3 year old DS and healthy parents/family and friends. So a lot to be grateful for as friends lose their parents or struggle to conceive. A friend died a few weeks ago and it really puts that stuff into perspective.
But honestly, I'd love to have a relationship. Ds's dad has never met him and I was single for about 5 years until I met someone at a wedding jan 2014. I was with him for a year but broke it off as although a lovely guy, he just wasn't interesting or funny enough for me. Then a close male friend told me he was in love with me but he was just out of a relationship and still living with ex, and he ended up being a bit of a dick about it all. I would have given it a go as we got on so well, but now we aren't even friends so that's made me sad.
So now I am totally disillusioned. I am fairly picky - but I don't want to compromise on things like someone making me laugh and being interesting. Plus I own my own home and business so I want someone with their shit together too. I don't care about money, but a career they are interested in and not living in a flatshare and able to pay their way. I hate OLD (did it a few times briefly and always made me feel depressed), when I do go out, I want to have fun with my mates, not try and meet a guy. I can't see how I'll have a relationship for the forseeable future to be honest. I am ok with that in that me and DS rub along pretty well and I am enjoying my work, but it gets lonely sometimes and I'd love someone to go camping with and away for impromptu weekends. God, even someone else to get up with DS or build train tracks with him. I feel sorry for DS sometimes that he only has me.

I only divorced early this year and a new man has appeared out of no where.
He lives 200 miles away which suits me , as I see him once a month. Perfect. We talk every day, laugh and its great when we see each other.

I love my own company and the freedom to do what I want.....but the Saturday night dinner party invitations have dried up, and I realise how much my friends do with their families.
I miss companionship.....sharing a bottle if wine or going for a walk. I don't miss a single thing about ex h though, and never will

It is the companionship of having a partner around, someone to chat to and have a drink with. Weekends are the worst time too as so many of my friends do stuff with their families.

im single forty going through hell would swap a relationship for a decent friend (or five so i dont piss people off too much!)

my ex is trying to reel me in at the moment i will sign the divorce papers i wont because i love you tells me he is so alone staying single waiting for me not interested in anyone else ever sent me a flirty message online on my OLD profile he doesn't actually know its me apparently he is single and very interested would i be interested in a hook up as im local (that actually hurt)