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Relationships

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Original poster

If you had your time again would you still get married?

53 replies

Smurfgirl · 14/11/2006 17:37

So yeah?

Not necessarily about whether you love your husband as much as you used to, more about the institution of marriage.

And if you had a big party for your wedding do you wish you hadn't bothered?

OP posts:

frazzledazzle · 15/11/2006 10:30

I love being married to my DH.We got married in jamaica just the 2 of us simple and no stress it was perfect!

meowmix · 15/11/2006 10:35

yes but would probably do it differently if it were happening NOW as oppose to when I was 25. It really was a wonderful day, just more traditional than I would choose now. Still kept the elderlies happy which was important at the time.

Lizzylou · 15/11/2006 10:38

Definitely would do it all again in a second...was very worried about being focus of day but loved it.
We didn't have a huge do , more a large boozy and laid back party and everyone had a blast, we got loads of people saying that it was the best Wedding they'd ever been to (which I suppose most people say!)

eidsvold · 15/11/2006 10:39

first time round - nope - should have seen the warning signs and run for the hills.

with dh - yup - just wish we had met sooner but being on opposite sides of the world was a slight hindrance.

Loved second wedding - afternoon on Aunt's property in Aus with afternoon tea and left them behind to party just as the sun was setting. Dh read a poem to me - fabulous. Loved it.

cardy · 15/11/2006 10:40

Yes would get married.

Didn't have a big party, I still wouldn't.

Socci · 15/11/2006 10:42

Message withdrawn

mumblechum · 15/11/2006 10:42

If you'd asked me 5 years into marriage I would have said no, we found it really tough going for a long time but have finally got to a stage where I can honestly say I'm very happily married. We've just had 15th anniversary, and about 3 years ago after having a severely brain damaged ds1, ads2 with major probs (now ok), ds1 die, I got cancer,we had a "celebrate life" weekend in a 5 star hotel in Prague and decided, once and for all that we are together forever. You can't go through that much shit together and not either be rock solid as we are or split up.
We had tiny wedding, didn't tell anyone and sometimes I think it would be nice to have some sort of party/vows thing.

Miaou · 15/11/2006 10:43

Yes, I love being married and I do believe in it.

I got married at 23, first of my generation, and had a huge party/frock/reception/posh cars/fireworks - the lot - but it was all arranged and paid for by my parents and I would have been equally happy with something a lot smaller. I'm quite laid back and was happy to let my parents go mad (which they certainly did!)

If I was getting married now (ie at the age I am now), even if money was no object, I wouldn't go to so much fuss. But I don't regret it and we had a lovely day and lots of fab memories.

Wordsmith · 15/11/2006 10:49

Yes I like being married. I wouldn't do it again (if this marriage failed that is) but I think it's a good arrangement for bringing up children and it gives us all financial and legal security.

If I hadn't have wanted to have children I would still have married. But like I say I wouldn't do it twice.

oliveoil · 15/11/2006 11:29

Yes
Love being married, and being referred to as 'my wife', even though to some on here that will make me a freak

We got married in Las Vegas on our round the world travels so couldn't have been less formal really.

I hate being the centre of attention so the thought of everyone staring at me all day in a white merringue makes me feel very ill.

FIMBO · 15/11/2006 11:34

Yes, in fact it is our 10th wedding anniversary on Saturday.

We had a small wedding for immediate family only, lunch in a posh country hotel and that was it.

indignatio · 15/11/2006 11:41

No
Been together 18 years married for 13 and a half. Love him possibly even more now.
For me (at the moment - I may change my view again in time), marriage is an irrelevant piece of paper. We are and always have been totally committed to each other. ds has strengthened that committment. For me, being married is an irrelevancy.

I did love the wedding day though.

hannahsaunt · 15/11/2006 11:50

Gosh yes - esp the wedding day bit - it was fab - I loved being the centre of attention and being the subject of many photos!

Also firm believer in the institution of marriage.

doormat · 15/11/2006 11:52

first marriage no
would of rather of chewed razor blades

second yes
only regret is never did it sooner

Cappuccino · 15/11/2006 11:53

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes a thousand times

had nice meal out; so no

doormat · 15/11/2006 11:55

soz didnt read the op

still love him more than ever, great believer in marriage

as for the party yes I would of rather of done it abroad on our own like las vegas or paris iykwim

kama · 15/11/2006 11:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Bugsy2 · 15/11/2006 12:26

I always find this really difficult to answer, as I am now divorced. I'm not sure if I do believe in marriage any more. It seems to me a much abused insititution these days. I like the idea of having a party to celebrate togetherness, but I'm not sure a wedding cert is something I'd bother with again.

ShinyHappyStarOfBethlehem · 15/11/2006 12:27

I doubt it.

BudaBeast · 15/11/2006 12:35

Yes...............

but not necessarily to DH. Should never have married hm really but was scared of being on my own and it was the right time rather than the right person. Sad I know. But now have a DS who loves us both and we both love him. Am not terribly happy but not too unhappy either. I just know there could be more.

The party/reception whatever is irrelevant although I did enjoy ours.

EllieHsMum · 15/11/2006 12:46

Yes to my 2nd husband, but not my first.

Upsadaisy · 15/11/2006 12:47

Possibly yes.....but would have left it till I was 26 or over.

It's a hard question as I'm sure i take being married for granted. i know it shouldn't but it does make me feel more secure in the relationship even though I know it really doesn't make a difference if somthing happens it will happen if your married or not.

confusedmum2one · 15/11/2006 12:52

I'm the same as Budabeast.

Yes I would get married but I'd marry for different reasons that what I did this time.

shhhh · 15/11/2006 16:20

dh & I married after being with each other for about 8 years. We had a big wedding with everything we both wanted and could afford.
I had the dress (and designer shoes)of my dreams made from scratch along with my bridesmaids dresses. Everything from the church to the venue to the colour scheme was exactly how I wanted it.
We honeymooned in Maurutius and Dubai and we had a welcome gift when we arrived home....DD had been "made" on honeymoon. This was after 3 years of trying and 2 mc's.

Now 2.5 years on I would love to do it all again (to dh of course !) and I wouldn't change ANYTHING.!!! DH & I always discuss our wedding day and how much we both enjoyed it and we would both love to do it all again, and again and again.....

I love being married and all that it stands for. IMO it shows commitment to my dh and vice versa. I wanted dh to know how much I loved and still love him and this was my way.I also wanted our future children to have the stability of marriage. DH did and I did so why should ours be any different. I also wanted to be known as Mrs x. That makes me most proud..
Even if we had gone for a small ceremony etc it would have still been the same BUT we were lucky enough to have funds to pay for "our" day and we wanted the world to know about "us".

EllieHsMum · 15/11/2006 16:32

Sounds wonderful shhhh Nice to hear a postive take on marriage.

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