Feeling very stupid and more than a bit upset at the latest online dating mug-off and wondering where I went wrong?
My history with online dating has not been good. Last two men I had sex with disappeared afterwards (I don't have sex with everyone I date), so that hit me pretty hard. The first had done the three-date 'say the right things' and then disappeared, the second I slept with on the first date (so to be expected I suppose). But I was determined not to make it a hat-trick.
So met this guy, he is totally different from my usual type; respectful, feminist, quite a deep thinker sort. He came with his own problems - namely a pregnant ex from a fling, which he told me about on the second date (just after he had presented me with a book he thought I would like). I spent a while talking to him about my expectations; that I didn't want to have sex with anyone if they were not sure about continuing to date afterwards, he reassured me that he was not a "going for the goal" type chap so date three lasted all weekend and was very pleasant. (!)
After that, I was unavailable for two weekends and then had an operation. He offered to 'keep in touch', which he did, loosely, which was fine. I did notice though that if I mentioned meeting up when I was child free (eg on a weekday) he was busy, and did not offer an alternative. This pattern has continued for six weeks. I have called him on it once, he was adamant that he was 'keen' to see me still. Yet the last message, which was a reply to my asking when he was free, was him saying he had started his course and things would be full on this week and the next. So obviously I have cut my losses and wished him well.
So in summary, how can you continue to date when you can't trust your own judgment, or believe anything anyone says? I feel like whoever I choose they end up being a game playing dickhead, whatever they say. Feeling very miserable this evening.