I've been struggling with depression almost constantly for the last 10 years and it's got to the stage where I feel as though there's only one way out.
DS (14 months) deserves a better mum and DH deserves a better wife than the miserable, guilty, self harming, suicidal wreck that I've become.
I take my antidepressants, attend counselling and engage with my GP and mental health services but I can't get up in the morning, I can't get to sleep at night. I only have to look after DS on my own two days per week and even that's more than I can cope with.
I just want everything to stop; to go to sleep and never wake up but I also know that it's a terribly selfish thing to want. I can't believe that anyone would really care if I was gone but they'd still have to clear up the mess that I'd leave behind.
I'm scared and in pain and I don't know what to do.