Three months and they're off - is this true? Dumped for first time at 47!

[SAHMlikeitHOT]

So, never ever dated before in my life as got married to first boyfriend. At Christmas I met (internet) lovely man (similar relationship background (he married his wife within a month and been separated for 10 months)) who came on incredibly strong - wanted us to be engaged after 10 days, we met each other's kids, parents etc, we saw each other every day, my kids had two sleepovers at his wonderful house, we are just back from holiday he paid for (me and my kids) and he promised me the stars and a long life together. Then, wham, out of nowhere - 'he has to let me down'. 'I believed those things when I said them' etc, and worst of all 'I don't feel it as much as you do'. I am totally heart-broken as am head over heels in love with him, his certainty made me lower my defences. So, two questions - how can I stop it hurting (I can barely breathe) and (pathetic, I know) is there any hope he may change his mind....

Thank you again - this has been better than therapy, and has helped me go 'no contact'.

I am 'filing' away a huge number of texts I would have sent to him and plotting lots of imaginary 'revenge' scenarios! These often include meeting up with his ex (don't worry - not in real life would I ever do that).

I had another terrible night - very up to date with world affairs right now! But I eventually dozed off and have slept in this morning which I think is another small recovery step.

Funnytobe I know now I am not the only one who has made similar mistakes - thanks for sharing. Part of the problem was that we could be so easily accommodated into his life - not to many hard decisions to make ...

We were both so nervous of getting it wrong at the beginning, and relief that it wasn't so hard possibly fanned the flames ... As I have said, two cups of tea are wonderful after being on your own for a while

Update - am now at my sisters (after 7 hours of driving) and am receiving love and wine. Not heard anything from him, which is a relief after reading your messages because I am absolutely certain that as soon as the door opens, I'll be rushing in! Although I know you would advise against it.

I had a similar experience after being in a loveless relationship - it was wonderful to be loved, and listened to and go places and feel at last I was happy.

It ended badly and i was very hurt, but i worked on my self esteem, got myself a social life and I am now a different person.

Don't rush into another relationship and go absolute NC with him - keep your dignity and delete him from your life or he will hurt you again.

If you rushed back in he would do it again. Be kind to yourself. You couldn't have seen this coming. But you will be a better person for having been through it. Although it doesn't seem like it now!

Thank you - I am extremely worried that if he makes any effort whatsoever to get back in, I will NOT be able to resist. So that's what I am fixating on now - keeping NC!!! Its so hard - he had quite a regular routine so I have a loop in my head of what he's doing at every moment but then it hasn't been a week yet.

My sister is being a star!!!!!