Would you mind your OH having a single friend of the opposite sex?

[fruitandnutlover]

I was talking to a work colleague recently and he mentioned that his wife is really good friends with a single guy and she visits this single guy every week without my work colleague. In fact my colleague says he isn't friends with this man so never goes with her.

I got chatting with my female friends and this subject came up and none of them or their OH's have separate single friends of the opposite sex. In fact a couple of them said if their husbands did they would feel quite uncomfortable about it.

All of my male friends are the husbands of my girlfriends or friends of my DH so there wouldn't really be a reason for me to visit them regularly alone.

Just got me wondering are there many married people who have very close friends of the opposite sex and would you feel comfortable with your OH being friends with a single woman/man?

Reading all the replies on this thread has made me smile because I've read a few other threads on here where people are clearly threatened by opposite gender friendships. It's good to know there are lots of people who completely trust their partners and don't see every single person as predatory. Yay Mumsnet!!

What a dumb and simplistic generalisation to make about regarding all people of the opposite sex as predatory.

Keep on being super cool. Hope it doesn't bite you on the ass.

Thanks Winky it's been a while since I've been called 'cool' you've made my day!

I'm not mad about this expression 'friends of the marriage', actually. Not because I think all friends should want to shag you, but because I think friends are the people there for you. If your friend is in a marriage that makes them unhappy, they are your priority and sometimes friendship means pointing out that this is making them miserable and getting nobody anywhere.

I am neither cool nor a wife, btw.

When I know that this said friend that popped into my mind straight away, has been madly in love with my DP for several years, yes I mind.
I was in last year during england game and she had a party going on. He said going out with the lads at the pub, ended up going across the road to ehr house (few doors up from our house) It really wound me up.

I have a single guy friend (who I don't really talk to as he is creepy weird) that has made it clear to DP that he fancies me a LOT. my DP hates him as much as I hate DP's friend (who he doesn't really talk to anymore!)

however DP's guy single friends are lovely, would never try it on vice versa.

No I wouldn't mind because I'm not a controlling paranoid mess.

A couple of my male friends have been told by girlfriends that they can no longer hang out with me alone. They are now ex-girlfriends. Equally if a man ever told me that I needed a chaperone to spend time with a friend I've known longer than a piece of string they'd be out the door.

A friend of the marriage is one that doesn't encourage deceit and adultery. Nothing more.

Even if the marriage is in trouble, a friend of the marriage isn't trying to get one of the couple into bed with them. A friend of the marriage tries to help sort it out however which way support is required.

I think that's what the term means.

I have several single male friends and I regularly meet them for lunch (either alone or in a group). I work in a male dominated industry, most people I know are men.
My DP also has one female single friend (also very attractive) - the two of them were flatmates at uni and now keep in touch, meet for lunch now and again. I know her very well and sometimes I join them, sometimes I don't because I don't have that much in common with her. We are very honest with each other and have absolutely no trust issues.