Sorry for length and all encompassing subject but I would greatly appreciate any advice/ thoughts on any of the below!
DH burnt out at work and we (and GP) think he's depressed. He's feeling huge pressure to provide now we have DS (2). In the past it was him who supported me through work crises. He took things in his stride. He feels it is different now we have a child and mortgage. I work but not in an industry that pays anything like his salary. The GP prescribed citapram but he hasn't decided whether to take it yet. We are aware that it might affect his libido (quite low atm due to stress) but also create ED (which he has never suffered from to date). I've organised counselling and he has had one session for now. He's talking to me which is a great start as he finds it difficult to open up and sees all the above as a failure.
Before I had DS we spoke vaguely about having 2 children. When I was pregnant DH mentioned that maybe 1 was enough. I didn't really respond as I felt lucky to be pregnant and thought I'd cross that bridge later. Since having DS (who DH adored from the start) he again said we should maybe stick to 1. However more recently he used the word, 'yet'. As in 'not yet.'
I'm 40 so it is now or never. I have told him this. I would like to try for a second because of the benefits I feel having a sibling would bring. I would like DS to grow up in a house with more children and where he doesn't have to play by himself or settle for inferior adult attempts. I am close to my sibling and always thought that it would be sad to be an 'only' child. Now I know that this could be the case for my son regardless of whether DH decides he does want to try for another. I can see that it might not be a great time to ttc even if DH decides he really wants to. I am so much enjoying my time with DS (even at tricky toddler stage) I'm also enjoying being back at work and I haven't really experienced that crazed need another baby feeling but yes if it was down to me I would have started ttc again a few months ago because of my age.
So to point 1 of thread... please can all you wonderful mums of one give me good stories, tips, advice on bringing up a grounded, happy, occupied sibling free child?
Point 2- if anyone has any experiences of libido/ ed/ lowered male fertility associated with citapram or the opposite, that would also be really useful to know. I'm thinking that if DH does end up taking the drugs that could push back ttc for a further 6+ months (maybe too late then) so I'd like to hear your experiences.
Thank you for reading.