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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Was he using me?

70 replies

livvy88 · 13/02/2015 16:47

It's been a year since me and my lo's dad split up. I hadn't even looked at anyone else until recently. I got asked out on a date and agreed. He's 7 years older than me and I felt this was a plus because chances are he's not going to be an idiot. So we dated, went out for coffee etc and it was really nice. He told me how much he enjoyed my company and wanted to see me more. We then agreed to have a night in at mine, takeaway, drinks and films. He was so lovely, really cuddly, really attentive. Then things got a little heated and let's just say, I didn't expect it but it was good... We talked after and he reassured me that it wasn't just a one night thing and that I needn't worry about it. I woke at 3am and he was getting dressed and said he better head off. I'm aware he had a funeral to attend next day but he literally hasn't spoken to me since. It's gone from always texting me, to nothing at all. I'm pretty upset because I finally bit the bullet and felt good about moving on and this happens! What should I do?

I know it's not because I have LO because he too is a dad.

Your views ladies?

OP posts:
livvy88 · 13/02/2015 17:43

Naturally I did take the comments to heart, I'm human. But I guess I could've explained better. My bad. Iwas in such a tizzy I just wrote what was in my brain!

OP posts:
Jan45 · 13/02/2015 17:45

Livvy, why not call him out on this, 2 months is a fair amount of time, he at least owes you some kind of explanation.

vicarinatutu · 13/02/2015 17:52

more or less same happened to me OP....kind of. Im never going to get an explanation and the bit of one i got didnt quite cut it. it hurts. Ive gone over and over what i did wrong within the space of 24 hours to go from him saying he loved me to him cutting me dead.

livvy88 · 13/02/2015 17:55

Live and let live eh? We solider on. Seriously guys, thanks for your input. My best friend has just surprised me with tickets to Fifty Shades of Grey so I'm off for some much needed girly time.

Bye bye.

OP posts:
GilbertBlytheWouldGetIt · 13/02/2015 18:12

"Don't take the First few comments to heart?" Fuck sake. Mine were supportive and constructive. Shame people only seem to want to read thinks they can kneejerk at.

Rebecca2014 · 13/02/2015 18:12

Oh god two months and he ditches you, that is terrible. The man I am seeing, I invited round to my house after 2 weeks while my dd was in bed. We have not had sex at my place but that isn't the point, it easy to judge when you never been a single mum or you have limited childcare.

He sounds like a total twat, nasty.

GilbertBlytheWouldGetIt · 13/02/2015 18:12

*things.

lemisscared · 13/02/2015 18:41

waves frantically to vicar how the devil are ya? the village is still going strong. We'd love to hear from you xxx

vicarinatutu · 13/02/2015 18:44

lem hi! i posted a thread in chat to see if there was anyone left i knew! its still there....and im glad to say there are loads of you!

sorry op...

Charley50 · 13/02/2015 19:12

Hi Vicar! I remember you from when I first got addicted to mn two Xmases ago.

Charley50 · 13/02/2015 19:13

OP he's a dick. Sorry.

SolidGoldBrass · 13/02/2015 19:21

For whatever reason, he didn't want to continue a relationship. Discourteous of him just to disappear but there isn't really a nice way to say to someone, bored now, bye.
You didn't do anything wrong, and there isn't anything wrong with you. But no one owes anyone a relationship, just like no one owes anyone sex. Write him off and move on, and good luck.

Charlie97 · 13/02/2015 19:27

Gilbert stop making every post about you and how people respond (or not!) to your comments. It's a forum and people skim read!

OP, you did nothing wrong! It matters not if your child was in bed or not. I am sure that you would be able to stop your child coming into a room if necessary, the same as when you are wrapping their presents and they decide to wander downstairs... Arghh! Not sure what fudgeface thinks you should be able to have sex in your home when a child is asleep in bed? When the child is 18 or you have married your partner?

Anyhow, he is a cock, I would text and ask the issue, but I'm an upfront person!

Move on from him, but don't ever let a cock put you off trying again!

X

thenightsky · 13/02/2015 19:34

Sorry if I someone already asked and I missed it (drinking wine and cooking and mumsnetting) but how long was/is it between shag and now?

I mean did you shag him yesterday and are getting angsty coz he hasn't texted today, or did you shag him two weeks ago and heard nothing since then?

NamesNick · 13/02/2015 19:40

Charlie97 you have just made Gilberts night Grin

Charlie97 · 13/02/2015 19:45

Oh feck! Have I? Confused

NamesNick · 13/02/2015 19:57

the fact that you responded at all Grin

Charlie97 · 13/02/2015 20:01

Takes note and kicks self! You are right, but on my defence I have drunk two glasses of wine, is that sufficient reason, or should I kick myself again!

Confused
lemisscared · 13/02/2015 20:59

what is the thread called vic?

maras2 · 13/02/2015 21:33

Hiya Vic !

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