People just don't want to know the truth about my transformation!

[camillarizzoli]

Last year after I developed a chronic health problem I decided to do a lot of research into health, nutrition and so on to try and cure myself as doctors told me to basically adjust to life with constant illness and just take tablets for the rest of my life. It was a lot of trial and error but over time I found that some things really do work and that it is simple really although it did require me to change my lifestyle completely. It really came down to eating really healthy, all home cooked food, loads of veggies, giving up drinking, reducing stress, exercising 5 days a week, getting plenty of sleep, water, down time, and meditation. After sticking with the program for about 12 weeks my health improved, I lost weight, my skin glowed and I felt alive for the first time since my early 20's. It has been great and the results really do motivate me to keep it up. My transformation is noticed by my friends and workmates and many of them have asked me what I did but when I tell them their faces fall and their eyes glaze over its like they just don't want to know. Its annoying for me because it was hard work but everyone seems to want to think it was a medication, or a supplement or shake diet or that I've had work done when it was really just changing the way I live from top to bottom. I feel like they don't really want to know the truth because its just to hard to really change your lifestyle and it is but once you do it you really would never go back because it feels so great. I woner if without my health problems if I would ever have bothered so maybe that is a big motivator.

Why are people so reluctant to make these fundamental changes to their lives, why does everyone seem to want a quick fix and then roll their eyes at anyone who does make the change?

I'm really sorry OP but you do come across as smug, that might be why everyone glazes over. I'm also interested in what illness you have.

Op if I were you I would practice not giving answers to people who are unpleasant to you on this thread . Then in rl you don't have to explain your health improvement.

jackieo, perhaps if the OP adopted the light-hearted approach you suggest, she might get the response she's looking for from her colleagues (although I'm still of the view that they're just not interested enough to listen to her).

But on this thread at least, she comes across as way too zealous to retain anyone's interest.

Agreed suburban

I just the my 6mo scissors to play with but it's ok I'm still a good mother because I ate an apple earlier.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks op is smug

Do you not think that perhaps they were just being polite when they asked "Wow! How did you manage that?" and hence the boredom when you give such a long and involved answer.

I would think of a short and sweet answer, people will ask questions if they are genuinely interested.

JackieO and suburban - why is it though that people have to be sooooo self-deprecating here in the UK??? Why is one not allowed to be proud of oneself and gloat a little? Every time someone seems to be proud of doing something, people think they're smug.

IMHO - this obsession with being always polite and under the radar is not good and seriously unhealthy. In other threads people are told to gain more confidence, etc. but then, when there is something they can eventually be proud of, people throw the 'smug' card...

human nature, plus ignorance. Witness the shrieks and refusal to listen for those who cannot recognise that a diet that needs to be used more than once DID NOT WORK.

don't worry about it. You can lead people to information, but you can't make them think.

And seriously, some people should take a look at themselves. There were some who were poking the OP knowing exactly that if she retaliated, they'd gather more support. Were this thread happening in real life, and in a school, that sort of behaviour would describe a bully.

Yes you answered your own question really. No one wants to hear that it takes "eating really healthy, all home cooked food, loads of veggies, giving up drinking, reducing stress, exercising 5 days a week, getting plenty of sleep, water, down time, and meditation" - and that doesn't mean they are only interested in a magic shake that will do it all for them, it just means they know they probably can't achieve that total lifestyle switch.

I try to get exercise, I try to eat healthily, I try to cook from scratch, I try to have nights off alcohol and drink water, I would love to have a meditation regime. But there aren't enough hours in the day to get it 100% right, and sometimes I'm so stressed, knackered and hormonal I slob in front of the TV with a takeaway and wine followed by a choc ice, etc. And in that I think I'm like most people, bumbling along OK, some days better than others, I do my best. People probably just don't like the message that their reasonable efforts just aren't good enough to be as bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as you - even if you're technically right.

Although remember that for some people it really is not that simple. Addiction, depression, etc are serious impedimenst. "Stress" isn't something that everyone can just "reduce" - some people are having a tough time and that glass of wine or comfort food makes it bearable.

Absolutely!

MadderPink

The thing is... looking around my work place... it tends to be highly successful people that also put a lot of effort in how they look. Not just my firm, DH has the same thing going on at his.

Like they are all seriously fit. At my level, there are only 3 women here in the UK. The rest are men. No chubby guys among them, and I am the chubbiest of the three women. People tend to go to the gym three times a week, eat healthy, etc. despite busy schedules. The fact that virtually everyone who gets promoted into my level suddenly has a makeover shows that they do think your looks advance your career.

Some people just make it more of a priority (or are blessed with slim genes). It difficult not to think that some really do have it all, and that can make anyone jealous, really. However, I don't hold it against them, and will just work on it, too.

Remember good-looking people and slimmer people are more likely to get jobs and get promoted in the first place.

And if you have a well-paid job, you can afford the gym, more childcare while you go to the gym, or maybe for your OH to be a SAHP so you can go the the gym, while they make your home-cooked meal, and so on.

OP reminds me of that Catherine Tate sketch, where she hovers over her colleagues desk saying go on guess how much I weight , or guess how old I am.

You should never discount, too, how depression can hold people back from going into full-on healthy mode. It doesn't even have to be major depression - but that everyday borderline stuff that can keep you very much in comfort-eating mode, thinking you aren't good enough for anything so why bother, sort of thing.

A lot of us struggle with this daily. And don't want to have "you should..." suggestions.

All in all, I think this was a stealth advertising fail. I think OP was hoping someone would ask her about her magic berries and she'd be able to put up a linky, but we wouldn't feel sold to so it would be more persuasive.

She is the "real mum loses weight and looks amazing with one weird / easy berry" person!

Then it didn't go her way

I must say that I was expecting her transformation to be down to spam fritters.

Spam fritters with a side of dingleberries.

the answer is in your thread title - people don't want to know the truth about your transformation.

This is what we all know deep down (healthy food, exercise, sleep, meditation etc) yet most people would prefer to buy a pill, or a berry or a face wash or a tonic and have it all fall into place. Even though they know it won't.

I'm sure if you are into TM you will also know about detachment. Your answer to your "problem" (if it can be called a problem) is to focus on detachment from what people think of you. This will also involve detaching from any interest in winning people over, or interest in their gossip, or sharing your POV no matter how much you believe you are right or it works, and detaching from thoughts of "you're all mad not to do what I do and experience the changes too".

I like the suggestions up thread to invent a "magic" solution and only share the real stuff with people who are really interested. perhaps you could tell them you sleep under a pyramid?

BTW well done OP! What you have done sounds brilliant, however what I am REALLY interested in is you checking back in here annually to report on how you are keeping up with it all.

hey op well done. Really i mean it. Changing lifestyle sounds easy but is in fact really difficult for some people.

I think the problem here may be your communication style? On here with the most innocuous of topics (a good news story in fact) you have 'turned off' quite a few posters. So you may want to think of different ways to get across your point, perhaps even examine what you may be (subconsciously) hoping to get out of these conversations. Praise? Acknowledgement perhaps?

Undeniably you have a great achievement but equally undeniably you seem to manage to bore or rile people whilst telling them about it. Either way i hope you carry on with your new lifestyle.

"guranteed if people stood us next to eachother it wouldn't be you they'd think looked better"

This thread descended to the schoolyard in quite a depressing way.

OP good for you. I'm glad you're feeling better. I think you're right, a lot of people just don't want to know, and that's why we have the problems we have with obesity, heart disease etc. And I speak as a fat mother of two with a chocolate habit who WOULD like a quick fix but in my heart, I know it's really all down to me.