Are you all single men haters?

[loganberry12]

It seems that all the advice on almost every thread is saying leave the bastard do u all hate men?

I do mean me BTW

I think given the number of people who do end up with some rather questionable partners, any loving parent would worry until they know their child is settled with someone decent.

Conventional but in this case, convention might just be based on sense.

I do mean me BTW I didn't think otherwise for a second

Meerka so do you think Toby meant to say, "As the parent of children, of course I hate single men and women. Don't trust the bastards an inch."?

My point being that there is a societal norm of men (fathers) being the owner of women's (their daughters) bodies. It infantilises women and perpetuates the myth that women must withhold sex from men and that it's only acceptable for them to have sex within a stable (heterosexual) relationship.

loganberry, I have not seen your other thread, but here goes:

I am married, have 4 sons and assorted male relatives all of whom I dearly love.
I am rather hairy.
I am a feminist and the older I get the more I find it… gives me the rage irksome that many men get away with brutal, damaging, horrible behaviour mostly towards woman and children (although men do seem to do a fine job at damaging eat other too).

I wish you all the best. I hope you find a way forward that keeps you and your children safe. I have no idea what specific advice you have been given, but my experience of the Relationship board is that many posters give very sound advice, often based on very hard won experience. Maybe what they are saying is not what is helpful to you just now, but it may not be wrong.
Also you'll find that MN is full of very varied people - men and women, straight and gay, married and single, various ehthnic/national backgrounds, various political affiliations etc etc. Some of us will be better groomed than others, too

LOL I read this as wondering if we hate all single men.

Yes, because I want to marry them all. How dare they be single.

Why did you start this thread loganberry12?

Do you think all men (whether they're married or single) are as awful as the ones mumsnetters tell posters to leave and therefore anyone who thinks they're awful thinks all men are awful?

That sounds a bit man-hating tbh.

I confess to being single but the implication is I'm either rubbing my hands with glee that one of these single bastards men has come back on the market or that going mwhaha that others now share the same miserable loser fate of not having a man

vivacia I think that tobyjugg was not so much speaking from the societal norm as from the perspective of a person who sees how some men (not all) speak about and view women, without the filter of being aware that a woman is around. (kind of trying to work out how you think here toby sorry - not a good thing to do).

I absolutely agree that there is the thing that fathers / husbands 'own' the bodies of the females connected to them. What was it Stephen King said - something like "he didn't trust any man, since they had his daughter's potential defloration hanging between his legs". But I've observed Tobyjugg post sometimes and he doesn't seem to be like that.

I simply think that some men are highly predatorial, also that some younger men can act like shits but actually grow out of it. Also, toby has a perspective that we just can't access.

Either way, I think a father or a mother would worry until they know their child has learned to spot a wrong'un. The process of learning that is usually painful and they'd like to spare them the worst of that.

'Fucknuckles'

so, er, to be a bit clearer: Yes I think toby was saying "As the parent of children, of course I hate single men and women. Don't trust the bastards an inch."

But perhaps with a bit more emphasis on the males because the way their reproductive urges work leads some to ... well to cut right ot the chase ... to be shits.

NB: not to say all males are like that, not at all. nor are all females nice, not at all. I hope you get what I mean

mutter damn, should not try to post after wine ...

meerka in what way do their reproductive "urges" work differently? Eh? Their anatomy works differently, sure, but let's give all men a bit more credit than to suggest they are in any less control of mediating their sex drive than women, maybe.

not going to bite, dirtybadger, specially not when Im not sober.

Maybe the alcohol meant you expressed it in a way which didn't represent what you intended. Hopefully.

ahem. sorry. time to log out, definitely

I hate your grammar.

Me
Me
Me
I hate all Men

Well except my Dad, he was really rather wonderful.

Oh and my brother, he's ok, ohh ohh ohh and my nephews they're great.

My brothers in law they're not too bad either, I mean they make my sisters happy and help raise my pretty fabulous nieces and nephews. (And 2 of them do great roast dinners)

My uncles are pretty ok too, I mean some of them are a bit old fashioned but they want the people they love to be happy, and are kind to the general public so I guess they're ok?

My male friends well they can be a bit farty at times, but in the interests of honesty so can I…soo I guess I like them.

That man in the supermarket today that I exchanged a wry comment with emmm I guess he's ok.

The men I work with, a bit geeky I'll admit, comes with the area, but they're good too and in the main very nice smelling.

My regular Dr/GP he's ok too a bit fluffy for me but I forgive him.

Oh and the man I've lived with for 20 odd years, he has his own rather fab moments.

So other than them I hate men, or maybe I hate PEOPLE who act like arses and treat people badly?

And sadly in the current climate if a man and a women are in a relationship, if he treats her badly somehow it's her fault not his…

I find this really insulting to the rather nice but normal men I know and love. The idea that they are so so, I can't think of the word/phrase but that they can't act nice unless petted and pampered is down right insulting.

Sad that expecting men to act like decent human beings is seen as hating men.

I feel like an MN failure. :( I don't know all the men in the world to hate them.

Hate them anyway, Jeanne! Why not?

ooohh, that had me laughing! Excellent!

Yes I think toby was saying "As the parent of children, of course I hate single men and women. Don't trust the bastards an inch."

But that's my point Meerka he didn't say that, he made it daughters and men.

But perhaps with a bit more emphasis on the males because the way their reproductive urges work leads some to ... well to cut right ot the chase ... to be shits.

I disagree completely. In general women can have just as much an urge to be sexual, similarly, in general men have just as much capability to not be shits.

To avoid any doubt on this, I made it "daughters and men" because the thread was about hating men.

FWIW, I worry about DS as well. However (and OK I'm gonna get flamed here), based purely on my own personal experience, I do think men can spot a man who's an absolute shit long before women can.

yes I have hairy legs and steel toe capped boots

Agreed men and women have just as much capability not to be shits. It's how far they choose to control that that I'm not sure about. I do think that men tend to be a bit less sexually continent than women (very broad generalization there, it's a scale of course). Women's sins tend to be different.

Whatever the gender, I'll be glad when my sons have learned to spot a wrong'un of either gender. I hope they don't get devastated along the way. You can learn a lot from disastrous relationships but only if you get out in one piece ... and I don't want to watch them going through through that intense pain.