You no longer fancy your DH- would you end it?

[lesley1960]

I am looking for gut reactions and don't want to give too many details for anon reasons.

Sex life never been great, had doubts at the wedding, went ahead anyway but it's been a stormy ride.

DH is the kindest most supportive guy ever, still in good shape, but there is no chemistry there for me now and wasn't masses at the start- I admit it was a biological clock' must settle down now, it will be okay' kind of feeling I had.

I am now looking at the next 30 years I might have and wondering if I ought to end things. Our marriage is almost sexless- something like 3 times this year and 6 months since the last time. I hate the way he kisses and he just doesn't 'do it' for me, but I'd lose a lot materially and financially.

I read the OP thinking you've been in a marriage max of 3 years and no kids were involved. Love your optimism that you'll live a healthy, active lifestyle another 30 years. Me too!

I was talking to an ex-colleague last night. He and his wife are just both retired; ok for money. He has a few motorbikes and rides them around the UK and she is off in Australia for 3 months. I've got no idea about their situation but it seems they are happy together but now have time to pursue other interests. Maybe (if you are still reading) you could look into going off and doing something for a while and then coming back home; or just staying but doing your own thing. I don't know.

In answer to your original question I wouldn't leave. This is because you don't really say what's wrong and seem keen on deleting the last 30 years from memory. You weren't sure when you married him, but that doesn't matter. You're not even the same person now. You must have grown close in the intervening years. What about the births of your children, and their infancies? It's easy to conveniently forget all the good times when you want to leave.

higgle what a sensitive and caring post