You're not pathetic at all chilly!
It's a bloody scary prospect to go it alone. You have to reach the point where your self respect/worth will not accept it anymore I think.
Like, a 'Fuck you mate, I'm worth so much more than this' type of moment?
Why don't you -quietly- start looking at options?
Jobs, rentals etc
See what your options are.
The kids will cope. They want their mum to happy, don't they?
Look, if my husband said this to me, I'd think he was a twat. In a bad mood. And I would make him sleep on the couch and grovel for the foreseeable.
BUT, if I look at my relationship I'm happy, generally.
I have 4 kids under 8 and my husband is really supportive and a great dad.
So that's the difference. People say stupid things in the heat of the moment, and I often roll my eyes at all the LTB's.
You have to look at everything as a while and decide if you're generally happy to stay, or if you're life would improve greatly by taking the leap.
But you're NOT pathetic. Xx