Advice from the ladies!!!

[MindOfAMan]

My DW always, always, always deletes the history on the tab. Sometimes I see her quickly closing screens when I enter room. If it was a DW asking about DH the reply would probably be ‘he’s looking at porn’. But what about the other way around? I come from an all male family (no sisters, mother died young) so am at a loss to how you ladies think. What’s the deal here?

Have googled the aforementioned pictures. Blimey.

I am embarrassed if DP sees me MNing when I've said I'm working, looking at clothes on shopping sites (even if I don't buy many), looking at celeb trash or sporn or appalling Daily Mail articles (often linked through from MN ) so I tend to feel uncomfortable and close down the screen if he hoves into view. I don't delete history unless looking at presents for people.

So it could be innocent, but that doesn't mean it it is IYSWIM.

Also MindOfAMan, your name should be used for a perfume.

Ok!! Hugh Jackman is a very fine specimen. Oof!

yarp Yes, ask her, because if my DH asked I would definitely tell him

No need for sarcasm! I'm assuming that the OP knows her well enough that he'd be able to figure out if she was being deceitful, as opposed to just wanting a bit of privacy. If he said "I've noticed you do this and it's worrying me a bit, so what's the reason behind it?" then if it were anything like some of the innocent suggestions on here then presumably she'd fess up, having not realised her behaviour was worrying him, until he said something.

Or not. Whatever. But if he doesn't ask, he's not going to get any further with this, is he?

Men do get rather leaped on for using 'ladies' on here. I don't see the same reaction when women use it. Mind you if someone dares call anyone else 'hun' it's pretty much the end of the world.

I'm a bloke but I'm similar to your DW because I don't allow anyone not even my girlfriend my passwords to my phone or any online accounts. It's not because I'm doing anything sinister I just think it's private. Obviously she is hiding something but it could be anything legitimate or something not so legitimate so don't jump to conclusions right away. If there are other signals that something is not quite right then maybe revisit this but if it's this by itself you shouldn't automatically think something is wrong.

Perhaps she's just googling that picture of Hugh Jackman every day...

It is difficult to guess though, I really would just ask... Good luck.

ladies is fine.
"you ladies" is cock, Oh no that is Hugh Jackman's cock. I mean patronising.

"You men", "you ladies", "you people" "you whatevers" is dreadful.

Just ask her! We don't have special mind reading powers you know.

MindofAMan

Ladies is a nice word, people are pretending they can take a tone of voice from some text.

Your a man, on mumsnet - your going to get your fair share of catty and sarcastic comments, you only have to scroll through these posts to see the kind of things men get called on here. It isn't "Gentleman" very often that's for sure.

Double standards - women slagging off the men all day for not understanding and being shit. Then a man comes on trying to get some genuine advice from a woman's perspective, and all hell breaks lose.

Did you manage to talk to your partner at all? Wondering how it went!

If it's any help and you are still around, I delete mine all the time (it's took me forever to find out that it could be done automatically )

It's just a tidyness thing with me. I'm very organised and it's just an extention of that.

Do you have any reason not to trust her?

How long has she been doing this for? Are you worried she is having an affair? Are there other signs that would suggest this?

Playing Bing or on Mumsnet moaning about you is my guess. Are you happy?

Tea

Actually, I wasn't being sarcastic.

Oh, sorry Yarp.

Tone doesn't always come over well online.

DH and I both do that. The only difference is he sometimes asks me what I'm laughing at on MN but I never, ever, want to know what is happening on classic car fanciers engine parts forum. But he tells me anyway.

Tea

No worries. You are right

Slightly perturbed that I totally misread Yarp's post as Hugh Jackman and bleach!!!

Why do some women get so uptight?! Us ladies, you ladies?! What's so offensive?! I'm off to burn my bra!!!

Anyway OP, how is your relationship in general? If its ok, I would just ask her. If not ok, I would still just ask her.

I am intensely protective of my privacy, but this stems from having an ex who would go through my things when I was out and steal them.

OP, your DW is probably on MN, shopping (for herself or for your Christmas!), or reading Game of Thrones fanfic. All perfectly innocent, yet she still might be a bitemarrassed if you saw.

Well, I am not a laydee but I'd agree the way forward is clearly to speak to your DW, OP.

Good luck.