Husband's new haircut

[Toastandstrawberryjam]

What's the polite thing to say when your husband seems to be sporting a new hair style that makes him look ridiculous.

Background here is our marriage is almost over, teetering on the edge of an abyss. Has been bad for years. So frankly I don't notice him much these days, but I can't stop noticing his hair.

It's not just me. The DC have commented, so have family and friends. To him and also to me...... In a WTF kind of way.

I get that it's not really my place to say anything but frankly my DC are embarrassed (and yeah I know parents do embarrass children all the time). And yes I would be shocked if he said something to me about my style, but also I would hate to think people were finding me amusing in that way.

I realise this probably isn't anything like it, but when you first described it all I could think was Nick Beggs... :o

Sounds very mid-life crisis.

What can you talk about?.

Why are you still together, what has or is still preventing you from leaving?. Please tell me that you are not staying for the sake of the children!. Dragging out a bad marriage is doing no-one here any favours least of all your children who after all learn from the two of you as to how relationships are conducted.

No gel or wax because he lets it go fuzzy.

Maybe ML crisis but his old hairstyle made him look far younger/better.

What can we talk about? Hmmmm dinner? What's on tv? Occasional work anecdotes?

I'm in the process of starting to sort things out to go. It's been a long struggle that has been very difficult after years of EA, so it's baby steps right now.

Bad haircut...years of EA. I am a bit . The haircut seems the least of your worries.

But if it is bothering you, I'd go with buying him some Argan oil to tame the frizz.

On the bright side, it's very hard for someone to be emotionally abusive when they look like a plank... Like counteracting the Boggart in the Harry Potter books. Riddikulus!!!

The haircut is the least of my worries I admit, but it's a pressing concern when my DC ask me why dad is growing his hair like that.

And yes it is helping counteract any EA, although that doesn't really happen anymore.

Suggest it might be a fire risk?

I think the haircut is just the cherry on top OP..

or the mop

How old are DC? Tell them to ask him. Or you have no idea. His hair. I'd say that and me and dh have a relatively happy marriage although I don't really like his haircut either.

If only Gordon Ramsey's wife had said something to him....

It sounds like my ex's current hair. I don't say a word. (Harder to see his bald spot though)

Sorry about the marital troubles. Is it like this?

Sorry you're not having a good time with him, OP.

If he invested in a pot of wax, he could get it nice and slick like this so it's not as embarrassing for you and DCs. Maybe you could slap it on while he's sleeping...

hmm..well at least it's not a ponytail...what is it with mostly older balding men and greasy little ponytails pulled tight , must be a declaration of still being rock'n'roll and a rebel..eurgh.

Actually I think that sometimes a seemingly innocuous thing like a haircut can be the final straw, a sudden clarification of other reasons why the thing is dead.

Hmmm....lost weight, new clothes,new hairstyle, going to the gym.... is there an OW do you think?

My DH recently grew a little beard but as his hair's jet black and the beard's white as snow, it was soon shaved off again.

I'd never comment on my DH's clothes, hairstyle or appearance, because he's an adult and free to select his own 'look'. I can have a little titter behind my hand though.

I'd be a very cross Spiders if he ever criticised my appearance. He can compliment me though (and often does)

Seriously, I'm so sorry your marriage isn't working. You're trying to be cheerful, but it can't be easy at all. Best wishes.

I really don't think there's OW involved. I'm not being naive about it because it would really help the situation if that was the case.

He has frequently criticised me on my appearance (although again, not lately) but I somehow haven't got it in me to say "wtf is going on with your hair". Maybe he's hoping to get a reaction?

Well, at least you can be sure that if there IS an OW involved, you can laugh in the knowledge that she is, officially, the UK's Least Style Conscious Woman (TM). That will be a comfort

He probably is, but it's obviously dead in the water if you can't even be arsed to comment on it. Quite frankly it sounds like you're better if out of it, without meaning to sound glib. I hope you are able to make the break soon.

So you hate him, want to leave him and feel the need to take the piss out of his haircut ?

Are you 12 by any chance ?

I don't hate him actually. I should do considering I've had a lot of years of pretty appalling behaviour by him. I want to leave because my children are suffering from witnessing how he talks to me and treats me. But actually I still love the man he was when I married him, even if that man doesn't seem to be there anymore.

And I'm not taking the piss, I'm bemused by it. Much as I would be if he suddenly started doing something else very out of character. And I feel sad about the fact I can't talk to him about it, that I can't talk to him about anything.

The haircut is the least of my problems but it somehow represents all of them.

I don't know, Sick, I'm just watching Gordon. I did to begin with, but it's maybe better than the highlighted 15 years out of date shocker that it was before.

OP, I think the shaved sides are trendy. Doesn't really work with no styling though.

This new haircut works as a kind of metaphor, non?

Anyhoo. The children ask why is Papa growing his hair like that, you say Dunno kiddos, dunno

Ps LOVING the pics, nice work, folks

blogs.miaminewtimes.com/crossfade/FlockOfSeagullsMikeScoreInterviewMiami.jpg

Flock of seagulls?