Recycled present from my mum...

[RubbishMantra]

For my birthday, I got sent a bracelet from my mum. The same one I gave her about three years ago. She has done this before, for example, my sister once received a crystal bowl as an engagement present. The same bowl she he had saved up for months for (as a child) to buy for my mother.

Fair enough if she wants to recycle unwanted gifts, but I can't help feeling hurt and pissed off.

Should I say something to her? It's not even like she says "here, have back this unwanted gift", she doesn't acknowledge that she's recycled it.

I think from now on, things she can't regift - so charity gifts, food items etc. or just don't bother giving her anything other than a card. She'll get upset, but you are upset now, and down on the price of a bracelet you gave her. Just give her nothing.

Tbh, I'd be sorely tempted to buy her the most tasteless thing I could find it the charity shops. Then, when it boomerangs back to you, donate it to the charity shop and buy a fresh monstrosity.

That way, you have fun, and charity wins.

Or only buy stuff with her name on it? My mum and I do this for one aunt.
Ha! There is no way she can re gift our gifts back to us then!

NB she too is passive aggressive - she'd moan when we tried to move away from giving gifts but when we did give gifts, she'd give them right back to us...

Just tell her you'd rather not do birthdays and Christmas anymore.

Is she short of money, or on a small pension?
Or maybe she is stingy or mean? I've a friend who re-gifts because she's too mean to buy presents. Loves receiving them though! She admitted to buying her family's Christmas presents in a charity shop last year. She got her mum a paperback novel. They bought her a house. Needless to say she's got stacks in the bank. But nobody likes going for dinner with her! She orders the soup...
Actually, just yesterday she rubbed her hands with glee when she remembered that I don't want gifts or money when I get married next year. We were in a gift shop, "happy days!" she said. Didn't tell her that I'm not having a wedding, so that's one free meal she'll miss...
Anyway, is she like that? Does she buy for the kids?

Swap the gifts with your sister, and each give the others back to her :)

She's rather well off, but hates spending it. For example, when me and DH went up to stay with her last time, we took her shopping. She didn't just want to go to one supermarket, oh no, she wanted us to drive her around them all because she had made a note of all the special offers in each. We'd probably have spent way more on petrol driving her about than she would have saved. I was quite proud of myself for putting my foot down and saying no. We'd driven 7 hours to get there the day before.

When I was a kid, my dad worked abroad for about 6 months. During that time, she was always telling me we were poor, and didn't have enough money to get the bus to town, we'd walk. There was a brand new car in our garage, but she didn't want to learn to drive. My dad lived on expenses, and his entire salary went into their joint bank account, so in reality, we weren't 'poor'. I think she said that to be the martyr, thinking that my dad was living it up abroad.

She doesn't spend money on herself though, its just all squirrelled away in the bank in ISAs and whatever. I don't have kids (am I allowed on mumsnet??) and neither do my sisters, so it's not like they're keeping it to pass onto grandkids. My sisters and I are all financially secure, so I wonder what on earth they're saving it for. They don't even treat themselves to a holiday now and again. They're getting on a bit, so why don't they indulge themselves a bit and enjoy it?

My mate's the same. She doesn't spend it on herself either. She's been wearing the same few clothes for the last 10 years. It's all squirrelled away... I'm careful with money, but I enjoy it. She talks about money / being poor all the time. Doesn't enjoy it though. Looks like there's a type...